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you are good enough, dont let anyone tell you otherwiseA home should be a place where everyone has sanctity. There is a huge different in being a place where you are tolerated instead of being a place where you are celebrated. A place where we accept each other, where we can be just as we are, without having people who always pinpoint something wrong in you. The parents are responsible to help children develop positive attitude towards their siblings and others. When they make a positive environment for their children, a place where they practice compassion and attentive listening, without sarcastic remarks, their attitude will rub off on their children as well. To cultivate good qualities is important both in home, at school, work or with friends.  When children and family members have space to ask question without being laughed at or feel dumb, they will grow as people, and become smarter. The same goes at school or at work. As long as there is an environment where people are welcomed just as they are, without being ridiculed or humiliated for it, they will play an active part in the goals that are for the group. We often talk about how certain people can improve their lives. Those who are succesful and smart have an idea of how it worked out for their life and so they like to share their view, to help others. That is good until they somehow indirectly put other down or somehow indirectly tell them how they failed. Without creating a positive environment, any change can be difficult to maintain for a long time.

Different Understanding

Teachers especially knows what I am talking about. Picture you are a teacher for a group of teenagers. You have just been selected for the job. After a few days of teaching you understand that the class has different level in their understanding. You can`t use the same material for all of the students. You have to use different methods to teach them. Not only that. Since some of them are slow at learning and some are quicker, the slower are making more trouble in class, because they see how in-adequate they are compared to the other who are smarter. The teacher has to make a good environment for learning if they want the children to progress.

Put Aside Differences And Work For A Common Goal

The same goes for a working place. If the manager wants all the employees to make progress he has to make sure that the environment is encouraging and people enjoy working there. The employees are often different, but as long as the management is good, the environment will also be good. Which in fact means both for the students in the classroom and the employees at a working place. The management / teacher has to have certain rules, that if and when are broken, they will be sanctioned. They should not be afraid of showing a yellow card the moment they see that some people are misbehaving. The most important point is to find out the reasons behind a persons misbehaviour. Sometimes the one that is making the most trouble is the one that is being treated unfairly by others. Sometimes people indirectly exclude some, just because they are different. Here the management/teacher has to make sure that all the rules are being followed. They can say : “We don`t have to agree about everything to cooperate about a project or task at work or school”. Surely most of the places we are either in home, school or work, most of the people are very different. So we learn to put our differences aside and work for a common goal, which is a, b or c.

Compassion Will Change Your Thinking

It is so easy for those who have a succesful recipe for life, to point out mistakes in other people`s life. If they had done certain things differently everything would have been better. No. We don`t know what other people are going through. What kind of obstacles that are in their life. We can`t be indifferent to people’s struggles when they are coping with anything, without being in the same shoes. We have to practice compassion. As easy as it seem to do things differently, a bad environment won`t make it easier to change anything. It boils down to creating a good environment for learning to apply what we learn. As long as we don`t have that, it will take more time to improve, if at all possible to make any change.

jannah, paradise, promotion, exams, allahA common quality amongst friends is that they support each other through all kinds of difficult times they experience. Often people help others and usually expect that their favour will be returned some day. Prophet Muhammad pbuh has said that those who doesn`t thank people doesn`t thank Allah so a good way to show your appreciation to Allah is to thank the ones that help you. What kind of circumstance you help another person in, depends on your own taqwa, godfearingness.

You Can Share In The Burden Or The Reward

In Ayat 5:2 in the Quran it is quoted “Help each other in Al-Birr and At-Taqwa; but do not help one another in sin and transgression”. It is not difficult to imagine that if we help some people in committing sins we will share in their burden for every people they wrong and those that learn the cruel tactics from them. Similarly if we help people to do something that is good for the community, we will also share in the reward for all the good that it leads to. It is up to us we want to earn reward or share the way to our destruction.

Be Just In Every Relation

Prophet Muhammad pbuh has said if people see something bad they should try to stop it, either with their hand or speech or at least think of it as something bad, if they are not able to stop it, and that is the weakest of Iman. It is very important that we try our best to be just in all our relations and in between each other. A father being just between his children. Spouses treating their in-laws justly. A husband being just between his spouse and sisters. A wife being just to her parents and siblings. We are human and bound to err sometime, but the best of those who err are those who repent. And then make amends. Whenever we see that we are on the wrong track, simply rectify our actions and change the track to something better. It is not fair that the faults of a mother is passed on to her daughters or a fault of a brother passes on the his siblings. Being just between different relations is not an easy job. One of them may not like you if you take the others side. That is why it is so important to make sure that you know whom is correct and that you are not taking the side of those whom are wrong. Supporting someone who is doing something wrong will increase his confidence and can lead him/her to do worse deeds in the future. If that happens you will have a share in the bad deeds that it leads to, until or if they make amends and come to the straight path.

When We Don`t Stop Injustice

Prophet Muhammad pbuh has said: “Help your brother when he is unjust or the victim of injustice”. The sahaba said: “we understand that we should help people if they are unjust, but how can we help them if they are victim of injustice. Prophet pbuh said: “Prevent and stop him from committing injustice and this represents giving support to him”: Maybe you have heard about some people who lives in a town and the most of them where really bad people. So Allah said to the angels, go and crush the town because of their deeds. The angels went there when they saw some people who were good and was praying to Allah, so they went back to Allah and said: ” how can we crush this town, when there are good people living there”. Allah said: “It is because of this that I want you to crush them as soon as possible. The good people didn`t stop or try to prevent the bad people from doing bad deeds, so I want you to crush them all.

Being Patient With People`s Annoyance

Of course you can imagine if there are only a few good people in a whole town how hard it is for them to stop the others from doing bad deeds, thus even bigger is the reward. Prophet Muhammad pbuh has said: ” The believer who mingles with people and is patient with their annoyance, earns more rewards than the believer who doesn`t mingle with people and does not observe patience with their annoyance.

Don`t Look Down On Those Whom Are Struggling

It is important that when we see other people struggling to avoid sin that we try our best to help them or at least not put more obstacles in their way. We don`t know our end, no one does. Prophet Muhammad has said that was a person whom had taken 99 lives and then repented, and by the Mercy of Allah, he was forgiven. Allah is Merciful and forgives all sins as long as we sincerely repent. Don`t look down on those that are struggling today, there might come a day when those same people will be the ones that help you on your way. So if you are able give them a helping hand, do it. When Allah wants something good for His slave, He helps others through him. Imagine you are sleeping and several good deeds are put in your account for those people you have helped, you don`t even know it. Never belittle a good deed. We don`t have to be rich to give sadqah. One can do that even without any amount of money, that also is sadqah.

Allah Knows And He Rewards

Know that even if people don`t see the good that we do, Allah knows everything, and it is He whom is the only One whom will give us reward. He doesn`t forget. The reward of those who do good is never lost. The struggle is real; Be good, do good, and if you can`t stop others from doing bad, at least think of what they are doing as bad, don`t put hurdles in others way when they are struggling, pray for each other, and help those you can, one day you might need their help. Allah puts us in the most amazing places, sometimes to teach us something, other times to, test our patience. May we pass every test, and may Allah give us barakaa in our lives a good akhirah. Ameen summa ameen.

butterfly - tough times reveal true friendsEven if you keep on telling a lie a hundred times, it will still remain a lie. If the truth is left unsaid, it will still remain as the truth. People lie so much nowadays that it is seen as something normal, which you have to do in your everyday life, if you wish to survive in this cruel world. Of course some lies are allowed even in Islam. For example when our Prophet Muhammad pbuh and Abu Bakr Siddiq raa made hijrat to medina they met a lot of different people on the way. When some of them asked Abu Bakr raa who the person with him was, he said, “he is my guide”. Those people understood it as being a guide of the roads in this world. But in reality he raa meant guide in the meaning of the Hereafter, Paradise, to prosper etc. It was allowed because they were in danger and people would have told their enemies about their whereabouts.

A siddiqin and a liar can never be the same

A person whom tells a lot of lies, will not be seen as a siddiqin, the same way a person whom speaks the truth, will not be seen as a liar. It is told in an hadith that when the end will be near, lying will become so normal, that people will say that in that place and that town, that person whom lives there and there is truthful. Because there will be so few of them, they will be easy to recognize, and people will know who he/she is.

A real life story

In 1.grade at school, my mother bought me a pen that could write in seven colors. I could just click on the color I wanted and the writing would come in the color I chose. One day another classmate, stole my pen, and put her own pen in it`s place, which was almost like the one I had, but not the same thing. When I recognized my pen being in her stuff, I talked to the teacher. Obviously the teacher didn`t have any solid proof from any side, as it was my words against hers. I told mum about it and she said, we will buy you a new one. That day never came, but I realized one thing, no matter how well you know a friend, you can never be 100% sure that the same thing wouldn`t happen again. This lesson has followed me through my life, and I have understood, that not every person is going to be happy when you achieve something. Some people will try to put obstacles in your way, and some will envy you. Therefore when you are succesful, it is not always that smart to spread the word out. We need to understand whom are our well-wishers, and only share these kinds of victories with them. We also know that the evil eye is true, so sometimes we need to tone down a bit before sharing some good news.

Trust yourself

It is also important that we trust our instinct, and don`t fall in the trap other people put in our way. When we know the truth, even if the whole world is saying something else, we should be strong and bold enough to stand on our rights, and be confident. You know, the whole world can say that your “turban” is black/purple/blue/yellow, as long as you know that it`s white, you should disregard what others say, and not give their statements any value or attention. Or simply nod and smile. A lot of people say a lot of bad words about Islam and muslims, but we know we are on the right. That doesn`t mean that we should stay quiet when others say bad things about us. But is sure means that we should choose our battles wisely, and that sometimes it is better to just be quiet and smile. Sometimes people say something, and later on they have to eat their own words, because they are proven wrong. As a wise person once said : “Be good, but don`t waste time to prove it”.

hold firm to rope of allah, do not become divided.We often see that some people come closer to Allah bit later in their life. Maybe because dunya has occupied their life until something happens in their life, that turns their life around. From knowing nothing about Islam they gradually start to become more and more practising muslims.

Some obstacles that they meet when they want to become better is that other muslims keep throwing comments in their face about their past. I guess they don`t realize that when a person sincerely repents from a mistake, he / she is as if she has never done that mistake at all. When Allah has forgiven them, why are they then so full of grudges against them. The least they could do is to inspire those new practising muslims to excel in their deeds. Or do they actually want them to lose hope in Allah`s forgiveness. Instead of pushing them away from Islam, they should embrace their brothers and sisters and guide them to improve themselves. And they will receive immense reward for every good deed of theirs.

May Allah help us to see the good in others, and make us His patient, obedient slaves. Ameen summa ameen.

status of women in islam 2Every boy is taught by his parents and especially the males in his life, how to treat women. If those role-models have poor character, than that would rub on of the boys/kids. This is mostly the parents fault as they are not teaching the right values to their children. It would not be far from the truth that if a kid grows up in a family, where the head of the family, is very strict, and his sisters and the mother has to do all the work home and is not treated fairly. That is what they will become when they become adults.They will think, that only their sisters, spouse, mother, daughter etc has to do all the work. That they can treat them the way they want. They will have zero respect for them and oppress them. It won`t stop them from mistreating girls at school, work, in the bus, and wherever they see them they will look down on them like they are less worth than them. Would they have liked if someone treated someone they loved like that? If they behave like that they don`t even know what love is, or what true love is.

Imagine, a kid that has grown up with the values of the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh), because his father and the men in his life practiced those values. How do you think that person would treat his mother, spouse, sister or daughter. Wouldn`t he just cherish them beyond means and be the best to them. Not only to respect them and help them around the house, but also protect them and have a strong feeling of gheerah towards them.

If the kids aren`t taught the right values, that would have an impact on them throughout their lives. Of course, it`s not always the parents fault either. Sometimes the parents has done a great job in raising their kids, but the influential environment they are living in, their friends and surroundings, have bad influence on them. Just to play cool and be liked by their friends, they end up mistreating the same gender of the one that gave birth to them and took care of them when they couldn`t do anything by themselves.

In respect of how our Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) taught men to treat the women in their lives, there are several lessons to learn. For instance, the prayer of your mother (father) is near to Allah and answered. If you are good to them, they will pray for your good. If you are mean to them, no matter how much they try to control of themselves, Allah can listen even their supplications in their hearts. So if you shouldn`t mistreat your mother, than you are also in respect of the gender never mistreat any other girl/woman also. Remember that the prayer of the oppressed is near to Allah. If you oppress someone their prayer could ruin your life or worst of all, your akhirah (Hereafter).

There is an hadith where the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) says that if parents/brothers have three of four daughters/sisters and they are good to them, and teach them Islam and they practice it, Jannah will be theirs. A girl/woman is a rahma to the family. They have soft hearts and are more gentle in mind and have more EQ (emotional intelligence) than men. Think if men had the responsibility of raising the children. It is the nurturing of a woman who raise children that becomes good people and a treasure to the society they live in. The Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) visits the house, where there is born a girl. That is truly a blessing.

Another thing is that men may have protective gheerah towards their own woman, but soon as they see another girl/woman, They would say bad things about her and treat her like trash. Isn`t she someone`s sister, spouse, mother daughter? Would you want some people to do the same to the women in your life? I reckon your answer is no. Therefore always know that you should love for your brother what you love for yourself. Just like you have a right to live happy, married and blessed, so does your brother. If you want to have all the great things that life has to offer. So does your brother 🙂 If you put obstacles in your brothers way, than you should be scared of the punishment for that from Allah. No one deserves oppression. Not even Pharaoh, to give an extreme example. Allah is just, and will give patience and victory to the oppressed.

If you are feeling sad because your brother has been given a blessing, then be patient and happy for him. He may have struggled his buts of for it for years. Instead of putting obstacles in his way, be happy for him and pray that Allah grants him more. A part of that supplication is for yourself, as an angel by your side will say: ” and may you have something similar”. Be patient. When your time will come, Allah will grant you abundance. Allah is great, and has so many blessings to offer. As a saying says, there are plenty of fish in the sea. Just because there is one fish less, doesn`t mean we are out of fish 😉 Be happy for each other instead of putting each other down. Remember, if you support your brother in his times of need, Allah will support you, in your times of need. Because as you reap you shall get. 🙂

be nice awesomelyWe need reminders like we need air to breath. Sometimes what takes us years to build, someone else in a minute destroys everything. Often because they are jealous. A shaykh once said that even if it takes you years to build something and someone destroys it a matter of second, build anyway. Because in the final reckoning it`s not between you and them but it`s between you and Allah anyway.

So when we remember that we are doing what Allah wants us to do, we might not get any appreciation from the beings in the worlds. Were are looking for the appreciation at the wrong places. For example, Some people are mean to us because the are jealous of something we have. They try to put obstacles in our ways so that we don`t reach our goal. If we are on the right (haqq) they won`t be able to stop us even if they are larger in number or has more power or has more strength. I.e the story about David and Goliath, where David won even though he was smaller in size and strength. The second point is that we will receive our ajr (reward) from Allah when we despite of other people being mean to us, we are nice to them, or don`t let their offences offend us. After all, it is not that we are being nice for the people. We are doing it because Allah has told us to and we will gain our reward from Him, not the people. It doesn`t matter how much mean people we will have to face. What matters is our attitude that we are going to be nice no matter what, because our Prophet (pbuh) has taught us that way, and we are his (pbuh) followers. Lets try it out 😉

strength 1It`s not that easy. But when we understand the meaning behind it, we feel calm and are able to suppress our anger. Remember that when other people talk bad about us, to our face or behind our back they are actually giving us their good deeds. And when they don`t have more good deeds, they will have the burden of our sins. So it`s a win-win situation in being calm. We`ll have to struggle and it is definitely going to be worth it.

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https://purifyyourgaze.com/

My Prayer..

“O Allah, place light in my heart, and on my tongue light, and in my ears light and in my sight light, and above me light, and below me light, and to my right light, and to my left light, and before me light and behind me light. Place in my soul light. Magnify for me light, and amplify for me light. Make for me light and make me a light. O Allah, grant me light, and place light in my nerves, and in my body light and in my blood light and in my hair light and in my skin light.” Ameen

Bukhari and Muslim

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Surah 105 Al Fil

Let not man be intoxicated with power, Or material resourses, They cannot defeat. The purpose of Allah. So Abrahah Ashram Found to his cost. His sacrilegious attack On the holy Fane of Allah brought about His own undoing:what seemed but frail Destroyed his mighty hosts in a day!

The foolproof tip of the day for everyone else!

USE YOUR OWN VOICE TO RAISE YOUR OPINION!

Nasiyat..

(",) My Mum always says that
you should marry someone
who loves you more than you
love him, because that man
would never ever make you cry
or be the reason that your
sheding tears. He would do
anything to always keep you
happy and satisfied (",)

Poetry

(“,) Your heart is mine and mine is yours, and so it`s been since I`ve known love`s true meaning itself, holding each others hand we stand together beneath the lovely sky, gazing towards the same destiny, just U and I (“,)

Naat/hamd-Quote of the moment :)

Saari duniya ke liye dard
se mahmor hain jo..
Ik faqat Rehmat-e-aalam
hi ka seena dekha..

Ye sab tumhara
karam hain Aka
ke baat ab tak
bani hoyi hain..

Ehsas dein toofik dein..
Phir jazbaen Siddiq dein..

Kya ye zarra likhein
Shaan Unki, jin pe
bejhein Salaam
khud Khudai..

Quote of the moment :)

Though we might sometimes
have to struggle through thick
or thin,We will receive each
other’s support to be there to
win..And we will blossom like
this through eternity..
InshaAllah
Ameen summa ameen

Når du er forent med en
du elsker, er det ingenting
du ikke klarer :)

Gode ord skaper tillit.
Gode tanker skaper
Inderlighet. God
giverglede skaper
kjærlighet:)

Mood :)

Content.