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It is annoying sometimes, when muslim leaders tell families, to keep their women at home. It is correct that women has a bigger responsibility when it comes to raising children. But we can’t close our eyes to the society we are co-existing in.

Your Opinion Matters

Number 1. The first matter spouses often have disagreement about, is money. Number 2. If there wouldn’t be any females in different professions, the muslim women would have to go to male doctors, male nurses male teachers, males in kindergarden, males in shops for women and etc. At a time where they need to talk with people of the same gender. Number 3. The most marriages in the west need two salaries to be able to pay for their expenses. Number 4. The wifes’ that stay home for the kids upbringing usually have a small social network. In other words, their need to socialize is not met by only going to the mosque sometimes a month. Number 5. Many muslim men doesn’t pay for the expenses of their wife. They do not fulfill their duty of providing for her and giving her a certain amount every month etc. Number 6. Instead of holding back our women from work because of their hijab, why do we not at least educate muslim men, to treat other muslim women within the boundaries of haya, modesty, lowering gaze, guarding tongue and private parts? Number 7. Help the women in your family to choose profession where they can be an advantage for the community, while also keep their hijab and modesty, and also be safe, where she is. When Muslim women will take an active part in their work, they will be able to influence decisions that affect muslims in their community. They will help build strong communities. The muslim womens opinion matters. 

The Patient Can Choose The Gender Of The Doctor

If every family told the women to stay home because of Islam, within a few generations muslim women would have far more trouble in going outside. The places where the female gender is necessary would be male-dominated. That could cause more trouble. I don’t know if anyone have been in Pakistan lately. There is a reason why they have built malls (shops) for females only. Or in a specific timing, only females are allowed to go inside the mall. That means only female workers will attend them. In that way, they do not have unwanted attention that decrease their freedom. And the safety of women is also safeguarded. Imagine, a woman doctor in Norway, can`t choose to only have female patients. She has to treat both genders. Neutrally with haya, of course. If there weren`t any female asian lady doctors, many asian women today, might not be able to get the proper help they needed. In the time of the Prophet pbuh, many sahabi took part in the battles where muslims fought. Sometimes as nurses bandaging the wounded and also as fighting the enemies. It`s in our islamic heritage. The community need more women to take part in building healthy communities. Islam does not dismiss women working. It just want both genders to practice the ethics of Islam at work and school, as at home.

The Beauty Is In The Perfection

I believe Islam is beautiful. I love Islam. Alhamdolillah. But sometimes we have to be a bit practical. Islam is perfect. But the practice of Islam in the ummah, makes it look ugly. A dai (preacher of Islam) once said. There was a time when muslims practised Islam in such a way, people said, look at so- and so- to motivate other muslims. Nowadays the name is often muslim, but the practice is so poor, that when we talk to some people who are interested in learning about Islam, we tell them to learn it from the Quran and sunnah. Go back to the real source. Don’t look at muslims, who doesn’t pray, and lies, and backbites and earn money in a haram manner. Their practice is not islamic. I`m sure many muslims knows families where the whole family has been muslims for at least three generations, yet still neither of the generations is following even the basics of Islam. Yet they call themselves muslims.

Lets Look At The World

In some countries, wagons of the public transport, is different between the genders. To prevent harassment of women. Some countries have been talking about it. In Afghanistan, a woman goes out with niqab and all her body covered. Even the face. Still these women are harassed there. It is because the men aren`t lowering their gazes and practising haya. In india, group-rape of women, and rape in general is widely spread. In egypt, women have their undergarments teared off in the street, by men walking by. It is not enough to keep women at home to protect them from assault. Parents must teach both sons and daughters how to behave within the boundaries of Islam. Haya, hijab, lowering gaze, and less interaction. If these men were taught good values from their childhood, many of them would have had a good character. It`s not enough to name your son as a muslim, if you don`t teach him good values, than it will be your own loss. Remember in many countries, women are wearing hijab, yet are still being harassed. Obviously the men must also lower their gaze and protect their private parts, and practice modesty.

First Look At Your References

Keeping the women at home, to protect them isn`t the answer here. It is the time of internet, YouTube, snapchat, Skype. Filth can be found, in the media, within your home. With free time, and boringness, many people can go astray. Ya Allah, protect us. Aamen. If you don`t teach your children to fear Allah, they can easily get misguided. The reason why such, problems are on the increase is because we think just knowing Islam is enough. That`s completely wrong. Even non-muslims know about Islam. Many times more than many muslims. Yet they don`t accept it in their heart nor do they practise it. We muslims accept the message, but do not live according to it. It is not enough to know that salah is important. Unless you pray the prayers every day, you will not be granted khusho, or the sweetness of salah. That which is the coolness of Hazoor Paak ‎ﷺ  and his biggest comfort in hardships. We need a spiritual awakening of the ummah. Where we also are doing the good we know. It`s like when your supervisor is going to hire a new colleague. No one hires a new employ based on what they know. Even if they have a master degree. First they look at their references. Do they have practise from the subjects they have studied. That`s why most people have many difficulties finding their first job. To have that first reference, that will open doors for better opportunities. When we improve on our sprituality we will practice islam also in private, not only in public. The wisdom of Islam comes from practising what you have learned, not just talking about it.

Housewife From Back Home

Many women in arrange marriages, who travel to norway, with their spouse, live at home for the first 10 years of their marriage. In Pakistan still many women are housewifes. Many gain weight. Many sleep the day and wakes after mid-day. No specific routine of day. The social life in Pakistan is better than in Norway.  A wife that is married to a pakistani here in norway, often have small social circles, and have to start from scratch, in building network. After these women have stayed home the first ten years of their marriage, raising children, they are often very eager to start an employment. Socialize with other. The children doesn`t need them that much. Their expenses have increased or not paid by their husband. Very little social life at home. Many eagerly start learning the language of their country. In hope of a job. Many health issues from poor diet. These women, most of them, wants to get out more. They have lived the life of being a housewife, in Norway. Their problems are underrated. Few talk about it. Many are also struggling in their marriage.

The Community Need Muslim Women In Many Professions

We can live in a bubble and think that this is what we want. Unless the world is able to offer it, we have to seek insight in the reality of our time today. Keeping women at home, is not the only option. First parents need to educate both genders about ethics of islam. Cultivate in them fear of Allah. Help them choose good friends and good education according to their gender. If you really want to protect your wife from the ill of this community, talk with others about how we can educate men and sons to practice islam also outside the home. Social life in norway is very different from Pakistan, and many wife`s lead a very deppressive life, staying home as housewifes. Help them choose profession where they can utilize their abilities, earn salary, socialize. All this within the boundaries of Islam. All this will help the muslim women increase their  quality of life. They will be happier. Active. Learning. Changing. Growing as people. Know more about the society they live in. That is important to raise good obedient children. They can positively  influence the development of our community. Ya Allah, help the community succeed in making it easy for muslim women, if they wish, to have an employment where they can use their qualities, while also taking care of all of her duties at home. Aamen 

rose, quality muslimah, islam, conduct, knowledge, wisdom, practice Islam, understandI have met so many amazing muslimahs the last 9 years. Women who has so much to offer, yet their resourcefulness is not being utilized. Their lives would have been so much more meaningful, if their family had backed them more. Let me explain more.

The Help They Need

A wife`s first priority after marriage is her husband, and after some time their children. In most asian muslim families, where daughters are brought from back home to the west. It take many years to help them adapt to the society here. Some learn the language easily, while others might never ever be able to pass test to be able to work. Although it is the family`s responsibility that these women are helped through there first years here, many times they do not get the help they need.

First Of All Imagine.

You have a network of family and friends back home. When you come here, you not only have to adapt into a whole new family but also build your own new network. That is not always that easy. Especially for wives, when they often get busy with parenthood, before they are able to learn the language properly. They have to postpone their own dreams in order for the family. I might dare say, many women come back to school, years afterwards, where they tell how much they also wanted to utilize their life for something more meaningful than just stay home with children and the little network they have or might not have. They have dreams to also earn a living, using their resources to earn money and buy things without always thinking of their expenditures. A little more planning and help from the husband could have made their situation easier.

Being A Mother Is Very Giving

Every woman has dreams of her own. Apart from being a mother and a wife. Doing something meaningful that is important to here. Having a social life, friends, network, buying things she need, without always have to ask for permission, or to be able to have women only evenings with her friends. Husband doesn`t realize that if they would support their wife more in achieving her dreams and some sort of independence, she would become a much better wife for him and a better mother for her children. Often times when women get married, they give little precedence to their own needs. Their husband needs come first. Than their children’s needs. Then their in-laws preferences. After a list, at the end their own needs come, if they have any energy or time to spend for themselves. For a mother to give her children to her husband and have a friends dinner out, is if i might dare say, not the reality for many asian wives. Although the husband in the same family, has at least one day a week, he can enjoy with this friends. If not many more. Even though the parenthood is both parents responsebility, often the mothers take the most heaviest burdens. They have a such job, that they never get any time off. It`s a 24/7 on work for their family.

Education Going To Waste

When husbands stop their wifes from getting a job or an education or to work when they have a sound education. They should re-think what they are doing. If and when the parents of a muslimah doctor had thought the same. The wife of these husbands had to meet a male doctor at the hospital for a check up under her pregnancy. Thank god, that some parents encourage their daughters to get a decent education with good values so that they can contribute to the community. We have muslimah doctors, nurses, teachers, dentists, engineers and so on. It is not easy for them to go out of their home and work. Their best hijab is in their home. But yet we must not forget that if every muslimah had thought that, our own muslimah wives, would have had difficulty getting any good help, without meeting their own “tribe”, when they need some sort of help/assistance. We can`t stop these resources from contributing positively for the society, and be so selfish and only think about our own good. Of course that comes first, but we must also try to help others, whom might have more difficult life than ourselves.

Muslimah`s And Islam – The Sunnah Way

Under the time when the prophet Muhammad pbuh had to do hijrah to medina with Abu bakr Siddiq raa, they left makkah and passed by cave thawr. They stayed there for a few days to protect themselves from their enemies. The daughter of Abu Bakr siddiq raa, Asma Bint Abu Bakr, came to them with food-supplies, through difficult roads and facing many dangers. The muslimah sahabi`s have helped Islam not by being passively at home, but by being with the muslims in wars, also fighting the enemies and taking care of those wounded. So you see it is not Islam that oppresses women, it is the illiterate minds. Even knowledgable people can be illiterate for not being able to believe in what is right and haqq. If knowledge opened minds of everyone than the most knowledgable lecturers would have accepted Islam. Not everyone does. Even in the most intelligent people there are many who doesn`t accept what is right for what is right and what is truth for what is truth. I believe that if you as a mailman have managed to find your way to Allah and believe in him and try to enjoin good and forbid evil, you are more intelligent than the lecturer with a phd, that thinks that Islam is not haqq or right. I have learned to calculate people, from how faithful and obedient they are to Islam. Islam doesn`t oppress women. Mostly the wrong culture does. May Allah give all wives help to realize their dream in their life. And make all the muslimah`s resourceful for each other and helping each other prosper. And guide husband to be more supportive of their wife. The sunnah way. Aameen summa aameen.

wrong and right.In some countries eating with your hands is seen as something good and normal. In other societies it is seen as abnormal to eat without cutlery. Societies and countries have made their written and un-written rules about what they see as normal. Something that is common in some societies is seen as backwards or illegal in other societies.

In many countries smoking cigarettes is seen as normal.

In fact if people attend a gathering and they don`t smoke or drink in that gathering, they are seen as backwards or old-fashioned. Even though we all know that smoking is hazardous to our health. It`s even done major campaigns to help people get motivated to stop. Drinking is also seen as a norm. You can`t have fun without it. The people who attend a party and doesn`t drink, do not know how to have fun. Though the police often talk about drunk teenagers being in a really bad condition after going home from a party. Drinking leads to many bad things, nothing good comes from it. Even though drinking is seen as normal, and anyone who doesn`t drink is seen as abnormal.

In some countries it seen as normal to have children outside of marriage.

Though we know that most children that grow up with one parent, doesn`t get the proper up-bringing a couple can give. Though it is seen as normal, even if it leads to people with many problems in the society. It is not good for a child to not have both parents with them. Or to have to have a father or a mother. A father can never take the whole role of a mother and the mother can never take the whole role of a father in a child’s life. The father and the mother complete each other and give their children the love, nurture, care and provide for them better when they have each other. Therefore same-gender parents are not good for the children. Even though in some countries it is seen as normal. Again the norm of the society makes something that is bad for the children, allowed. If the child grows up without knowing who their parent is, that is also detrimental for those individuals.

We know that weapons and knives can harm

We know that it is not good for all people to have weapons. We know that people can get killed and injured. Even when it can be an accident. We know out of numbers and incidents that in America there are many deaths because it is easy to buy weapons. Many people harm other because of it. It is not good for the society. Using weapons and showing off with them, is seen as cool and normal. Though we know it can take a life. We say we don`t want more wars, but many countries are earning lots of millions because they are selling weapons to other countries. This is seen as normal. I know your going to mis-use the weapons I`m selling you, but just because I need to earn that money, I don`t “mind” that you take as many lives as you want with it? Is this normal for you? We are talking authorities here. Not ordinary people. Authorities that maybe sitting in some peace congregation and promoting peace for all. But are they really, really working for it or against it? Being biased is seen as normal. That is not normal to me. These weapons take lives. A life in Pakistan or Syria is just as much worth as a life in Britain, Russia or America. When we are making it easy for other to kill other people, we are not working for the peace we were promoting in the congregation of UN or work for betterment for children or mothers like UNICEF promotes.

The average people has talked about someone in their absence

I guess over 70% of people backbite others. It is seen as normal in most societies today. If you are of those people whom dislike it, you would probably avoid social gatherings. Most socializing involves talking behind some people. If you don`t you are seen as a bore, whom doesn`t have anything to entertain with. When in fact a person whom is talking about others life, is indirect saying that my life is so boring, that I need to tell you about another person so that you would want to talk with me. The best people are those who talk about ideas and have healthy discussions that does not involving in talking bad about other people. Talks that are meaningful and bring out good, motivates and inspires.

It is not normal until it is good for you

We know that smoking, drinking, buying weapon, mixing without marriage, backbiting is bad for us. If the society and its people set a norm that is bad for the people, why is it seen as normal, when it makes ab-normal people. This has everything to do with humanity and wanting what is best for each other. We don`t need to be christian, jew, hindu, atheist or a muslim to know that all of these matters are harmful for our well-being. I can`t understand the fact that the community can legalize anything that is harming its citizens. It is not ok. And it is not normal. We need to define what is good, as normal. Don`t let people with wrong values decide what normal is to you, just because a lot of people are indulging in it. Right is right even if only one person is doing it. Wrong is wrong even if the whole community has “legalized” it. We want to normalize as norms, what is good for our  hearts, souls and bodies to build healthy people and good communities for muslims and non-muslims where we live.

smiley starYou know when your children come home from school, and you see that their arguments and their behaviour has changed. The first thing you should find out is if they have been with some new or old friends lately. Most people are easily affected by people and their thoughts. Some people let others opinion have precedence no matter how many good points they have to contribute.

 

The Sun Is White Today

It is great to have friends and have someone to spend time with, share ideas, have fun, and be yourself. Though it is very important that we understand that friends arguments are colored by their opinions and values. You should make your own opinion about matters rather than letting other people (your friends) decide what you should think. It is like some friends can say; today the sun is white. You won’t believe it because you know that the sun is always yellow. But when you see that all of your friends are saying that the sun is white today, eventually you’ll stand beside them, and say the same. Pressure.

 

Research, Research, Research

Listen to others opinions, but make your own thoughts about the matter, after you’ve heard all sides. In that way you won’t let your opinions be based on a few distorted opinions that are far from the truth. Rather your opinion will be based on what is right and correct after you`ve researced all sides of the matter, and concluded with your opinion. Since all of us are not born einstein, we sometimes have to ask other people to help us, when there is something that is out of our own understanding. Make sure that you ask people who are reliable and knowledgable and they wouldn`t distort the truth for some benefit, but would rather be bold enough to say it as it is. Not to gain support but to open people`s mind to what is happening.

 

Conclusion

No matter how many people your socialize with don`t lose your own voice, even when you are in a crowd. Hear all sides of the story but at the end make your own opinion. Talk with experts in the field rather than listening to people`s random opinions about the subject.

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My Prayer..

“O Allah, place light in my heart, and on my tongue light, and in my ears light and in my sight light, and above me light, and below me light, and to my right light, and to my left light, and before me light and behind me light. Place in my soul light. Magnify for me light, and amplify for me light. Make for me light and make me a light. O Allah, grant me light, and place light in my nerves, and in my body light and in my blood light and in my hair light and in my skin light.” Ameen

Bukhari and Muslim

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Surah 105 Al Fil

Let not man be intoxicated with power, Or material resourses, They cannot defeat. The purpose of Allah. So Abrahah Ashram Found to his cost. His sacrilegious attack On the holy Fane of Allah brought about His own undoing:what seemed but frail Destroyed his mighty hosts in a day!

The foolproof tip of the day for everyone else!

USE YOUR OWN VOICE TO RAISE YOUR OPINION!

Nasiyat..

(",) My Mum always says that
you should marry someone
who loves you more than you
love him, because that man
would never ever make you cry
or be the reason that your
sheding tears. He would do
anything to always keep you
happy and satisfied (",)

Poetry

(“,) Your heart is mine and mine is yours, and so it`s been since I`ve known love`s true meaning itself, holding each others hand we stand together beneath the lovely sky, gazing towards the same destiny, just U and I (“,)

Naat/hamd-Quote of the moment :)

Saari duniya ke liye dard
se mahmor hain jo..
Ik faqat Rehmat-e-aalam
hi ka seena dekha..

Ye sab tumhara
karam hain Aka
ke baat ab tak
bani hoyi hain..

Ehsas dein toofik dein..
Phir jazbaen Siddiq dein..

Kya ye zarra likhein
Shaan Unki, jin pe
bejhein Salaam
khud Khudai..

Quote of the moment :)

Though we might sometimes
have to struggle through thick
or thin,We will receive each
other’s support to be there to
win..And we will blossom like
this through eternity..
InshaAllah
Ameen summa ameen

Når du er forent med en
du elsker, er det ingenting
du ikke klarer :)

Gode ord skaper tillit.
Gode tanker skaper
Inderlighet. God
giverglede skaper
kjærlighet:)

Mood :)

Content.