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We know that many muslim families in the west, help their children start wearing hijab from primary school. Many non-muslim disagree about this practice. Even politicians have spoken against it, and want the authorities to ban hijab from school. Hijab is fardh, obligatory, from puberty, in Islam. The years before puberty it is optional for the child if she prefers to wear it. Often parents want the child to start with hijab early, because parents want their child to use hijab from their early teens. If they get used to the idea, it will become an easy choice for them to choose it also for their early adulthood. The problem arises because non-muslims think that children are forced to wear hijab. So they are thinking about banning it so no child is forced to wear it. The parents here are helping children wear covering clothing that increases the dignity and honour of girls. That can prevent them from becoming easy victims of sexual abusers.

Teens Who Hide Their Age

How do they dress in the west? Children are influenced to wear clothing like adults. The media, commercials, socializing with friends, celebrities sites. A whole industry of buying what is “popular” right now. The pressure is immense. Many children wear revealing clothing that adults wear, that while their real age is 10, they look like they are adults. In other words, 15-20 years ago, it was easy to see the real age of children from what clothing they wear and their behaviour. Now that is impossible. The influence of youtube and media, how a child behaves and what she chooses to wear, often robs them from their childhood. The children’s mind and thoughts mature faster than their age. When children, girls, behave and think and wear clothing that is above their age, they will easily attract the opposite gender who are more mature and elder than them. When they go places no-one knows their real age, they can easily fake being 18 etc. We know the issue about under aged children, fake ID and trying to get in contact with elder people, just to experience the thrill of having done something brave, and a good story when they meet their ordinary friends. We have heard real incidents in Norway and in uk about underaged girls having sexual relations with men in their twenties. There is a possibility that these girls have hid their real age. We can`t be assured that it is only the mens fault. It is of great trouble for the community when children look like adults, because of what they wear and how they behave. It is very important for a child to have friends that are on their own age and not above their age. When they first grow up, they can`t be a child again. But if they grow up too early, and we could prevent it, we robbed their childhood from them. That is really sad. If we are to decide that a muslim child can`t cover themselves completely, I think it is also about time we decide that non-muslims are not allowed to wear certain revealing clothing at the primary school. If we Morally evaluate the effect of half-naked children at school, compared to all-covered children at school, the effect of lesser clothing, is worse than the effect of those who choose to cover themselves completely.

How A Rapist Choose His Victim

When we read about those who have raped, some people have done a study of these people. As to why they rape, and who they choose. In these studies, they have come to the conclusion that if the rapist saw two women coming to the area he wants to attack, and one of them are dressed half-naked and the other is wearing covering clothing, he will choose the woman with less clothing. In other words, the rapist won`t choose a woman who is covered. Even though we agree that raping is not allowed. And those who rape are not allowed to rape, even if the whole town doesn`t wear clothing. Even if it is not the victims fault that she is being raped. To protect her from being raped, every caring mother would tried to convince her daughter to not wear these clothing outside the house, where she is in danger of being a victim of abuse. Where she can come across other rapists. We have to help our children make good choices so we can save them from these dangerous people. No-one sends their children to dangers. We love our children more than we love ourselves.

How Can Our Sons Focus Easier And Learn More At School

When there comes to understanding relationships and why and how men or women behave, we all agree that they are different. Different in how they understand love, how they understand respect, different in what qualities are important for them in their relationship. Men are turned on differently then women. Men are visual. The more of beauty that can be seen of a woman the more the man will have difficulties to not look. In the book “What you need to know about inner life of men” by Shaunti Feldhahn, she explains how men think and why. This is how Allah made men. This is the test of men. If women are more aware of their clothing when they step outside their home, and hide their beauty with hijab, many men would have easier days outside their homes. If men lose focus of what they are doing when they see a beautiful woman, I`m positive so does a boy lose focus of what they are doing when they see a beautiful girl at school. As a mother of boys, how well do you think your sons focus is in school, if a girl, a class-mate of his is wearing half-naked clothing every day of summer?

I Worry More About My Daughters

Often people worry about mothers of daughters, because they think that they have a more difficult job raising their children than those mothers of sons. I don`t think the one is easier or more difficult than the other. Both jobs, raising a son or a daughter is challenging. It is important to teach both genders to behave modestly and good. Sons must be taught to respect women regardless of how they behave. Women must be taught to respect themselves and behave with dignity and honour and protect their beauty. If we allow children to go around half-naked at school and ban those people who choose to cover themselves completely, we are shooting ourselves, by making it more troublesome for the children to focus in their learning, and may not be able to protect them from illicit relations / problems were the moral standards are low. If the authorities could balance their decision, it would be more helpful. Do not allow children to wear half-naked clothing of sexual art at school. Those children who choose to cover themselves should be allowed. If we think from what the child says, that she is being forced to wear a hijab, than take action. If we find out that children are wearing hijab with free will, it should be allowed. There should be some sort of balance. Non-muslims do not understand the detrimentalness of socializing between boys and girls who have no sence of modesty, dignity and honour. The police in Norway often update their social media platform, with info about crimes in Norway. Lately they have said that there is an increase of sexual offences. Many experts in the field assume there are much higher number of sexual assaults than what is reported to them. This often comes from filth in the media, nudity, weird programs on internet and tv, internet and socializing with the wrong people and alcohol and drugs. No boundaries is equal to chaos. If we look at the behaviour of places in Norway there is more muslim youth and places where there are less muslim youth, experts say in places with many muslims, the youth smoke less and drink less alcohol. And places where there are less muslim youth, the youth drink more alcohol. It is said that if the parents drink alcohol, it is likely that their children will adopt the drinking habits of their parents. If we look at the education of muslims and foreigners, they are on top when it comes to taking higher education. Especially the girls. The boys are behind. Maybe the reason why boys are behind when it comes to higher studies is the fitnah, tribulations they experience. So we see that the muslim community has also increased the communities with goodness. It is not all negative. But negative information gets more coverage in media. They blow up information. People who don`t know or check the real facts, start believing the mis-information of many journalists. Ya Allah, please help us to protect every ummati from negative influence and grant every ummati all good righteous company everyday, all day. Help us to protect our communities for our families and for the families that will live here in the future. Aamen

Often times many women, also the muslim women, talk about fighting for equality with men. Equality in leadership, in pay, in society, in communities. This thought is not adaptable to Islam. In Islam men and women have different rights and duties. Men and women are incomparable because of their differences.

In-Comparable Differences

In every hospital, there are doctors and nurses. Although both are needed for the treatment of the patients, they both have different responsibilities in their work. We can`t only have doctors in the hospital or only have nurses. Both are needed for the function of the hospital. In an operation of a patient we can easily see that the doctor has more responsibility of the well-being of the patient than the nurses. Both are needed for the patients operations. We can`t equal the pay of the doctor with the nurses or the nurses pay with the janitor. Although these professions are needed, we can only have full equality between professions who have similarities. There can`t be any comparing between different professions. Doctors can compare their pay with other doctors. Nurses can compare their responsibility with other nurses. Janitors can compare their work-load with other janitors. That`s why many skilled workers join union movements. To fight for the rights of their profession. So when it comes to women and men, they also are non-comparable to each other, because of their difference in their function emotionally. biologically, physiologically and psychologically.

The Empathy And Sensitivity Of A Police-Woman

There is a reason why there are more men in some professions than women and vice versa. Often times there are more women working as teachers. There are often more men in the profession of doctors and engineers compared to women. The “incomparability” is the key word. This doesn`t mean that we can`t strengthen the rights of women or men in different professions. No matter how much we facilitate for women / men in some professions, not every profession is made for the majority of women / men. For example no matter how strong a woman police officer might be, when she experience something difficult, because of her natural in-built empathy, her response to the crime scene will be more sensitive. Because women are more sensitive than men. And no matter how caring and gentle a man is, he can can`t replace a mothers love, care and upbringing for her child. It`s just impossible. The role of bearing a child, can`t be given to a man, because it`s given to women by Allah. So in every profession where women work, one time or the other, she will have to take a years leave for her duties as a mother. That is her right and responsibility, and it follows her no matter what profession she chooses. Let`s rather use the resources we have on matters where we can have a positive impact for the community and society. Some professions are tougher and harder than others. It will have an impact on the human that chooses those. For example, police, psychologist, doctor, social worker, child welfare employee, social security employee etc.

Allah has made the world and everything in it. Humans are the only creature who have been given intellect. In every species, there is a she and a he and from them both, comes a child. Only the she over every species can bear a child and there has to be a male and female of the species to bring a child to the world. Allah decided that for the animals, to make it a sign for us humans. Since humans have to find their way back to Allah themselves, they have to understand this wisdom to stay on the right path and protect themselves from one-gender-relationships. People often find excuses that some people are born gay. I don`t think that is correct. Every human is born as muslim, a natural inclination towards accepting Islam. And then his parents and friends make him a jew, christian or a muslim. It means that the people we interact with from our childhood, their beliefs, their conduct, their morals has an effect on our own belief, conduct and morals. If the environment we are brought up in has such a great impact on our belief, why wouldn`t it also have an impact on our sexual orientation.

Gap Between “Feeling” And True State

A person who eats much despite being full in the stomach, because of some emotional disturbance, still “feels” hungry, so eat more than what he / she has the capacity of. He / she “feels” hungry, but is full. It is an emotional need that “feels” like a hunger, it is not because the body needs food. Another human who has anorexia, he / she eats less than what his body need of nutrition. He / she “feels” that eating too much will harm him / her. He / she doesn`t “feel” like eating, even though the body, is weaker because of eating less than what is needed. Often times when we have a fever, we “feel” cold and feel chilly. But when we check our temperature we find out that we are warmer than what is normal of a human being. But we are “feeling” cold. These examples explain that humans are “feeling” something else than how their body actually is. Can we then rely on their “feelings” or should we rely on the actual state of their body?

How Allah Protect Us

What we read, hear, talk about, learn, who we interact with, in what way we interact with others, all of these matters has a great impact on our personality. If we don`t protect ourself from impure information, our thoughts will become impure, which again will have an effect on our behaviour. Allah gave us rules on how to interact with the opposite gender and also the same gender. Allah gave us boundaries to protect the purity of our soul and body. When Allah warned the People of the time of Prophet Lut alahisalam, He warned them because he wanted to keep them pure.

In The World Of The Unseen

We also need to understand the world of the unseen, ghayb in this. Muslims believe in the creation of Jinns, who whispers in the breasts of people, Surah falaq ayat 5. When we remember Allah, and keep our hearts pure we are protected from such whispers. The creation of jinn, some are muslims and some are not. Those who are not, can harm the humans by whispering in their breasts. That means that we can`t be sure that the thought in our mind is actually from ourself or a whisper from shaytan or jinns. Only way to protect ourself from bad thoughts is keeping the heart pure, wudhu, remembrance of Allah, salah, morning and evening adhkar, removing the hair in the underarms and private parts, 6 kalimah of Islam. And since the eman increases and decreases, the bad thoughts will come and go. When we use the muslim ways of keeping ourself pure, we will be rewarded by Allah for our struggle. Bad thoughts come, because these shayatin and jinns wants to take us off the right path. When we try to get on the guided path, sometimes the bad thoughts increases. That is because the shaytan is trying to make us turn away so we won`t get close to Allah and granted his Qurb and forgiveness. Shaytan doesn`t go to someone who doesn`t practice eman, a heart that doesn`t remember Allah, is poor and of no value for shaytan. Shaytan only distracts those who turn to Allah, and struggle with highs and lows of eman. That is why we need to ask Allah to guide us, and keep us pure. So we can fight every battle against shaytan and the nafs, the self. There is no pleasure of this world that is better than the souls eternal bliss in paradise. Ya Allah, grant all ummah paradise Al-Firdaws. Aamen

Different Reasons For Attraction

Attraction is not equal to love. Some are attracted to others because of their intellect. Some are attracted because of others empathy and care. Some are attracted because of others beauty. Some are attracted because of conduct, morals and manners. An attraction means you admire a quality in another human. It doesn`t have to be anything sexual. You may be attracted because of the quality despite the gender of that human. Humans have a soul and a body. Both needs nourishment. The body needs food, drink and sexual activity. The soul need noorani nourishment, gained from Allah. That is achieved from practising spirituality, through Islam. Often humans make sure to nourish the body and forget the soul, while the soul is starving to connect with Allah. When our soul lives according to the morals and manners of Islam, and we nourish it by our obedience and practising of Islam, we are able to avoid the spiritual death of our soul. Obedience of Allah is equal to a good spiritual health. Muslim believes that body will die, soul will pass on to the hereafter. The soul will be rewarded or punished because of how the body lived in the world. We believe that the hereafter is for eternity. Why put your eternity for risk, by not living according to the morals of Allah in the world. Allah made the soul and the body. Only the Creator of the human knows what is good for the human. The creation can`t always grasp the wisdom behind everything. Allah is All-Wise. Even when we don`t fully understand everything, we put our trust in the fact that Allah knows best for us. And we don`t put a question to it. Allah sees everything in the universe, knows everything, even before the universe, the stars, the planets, the solar systems, and all the creatures in it. How can our mind be able to fully comprehend that? We have spent years to understand what happens beyond the earth on other planets. And still we know very little. And think that there are probably many other planets and systems beyond what we can see and know. Not to talk about all the creatures we can`t see, like angels and jinns. Allah sees the whole picture while we humans only see a pixel of the whole picture. How can we comment wisely on a picture we only have seen one pixel of. No human will be able to comment what the picture is about if he only knows that little. Impossible. Just like a mother will protect her child from any danger, because she loves her child. Children doesn`t understand the dangers of life in that fragile age. The mother protects the child, til the child becomes an adult and is able to take care of himself / herself. The Creator, Allah, wants to guide the creation because He Allah is Al-Wadud, He loves us, and wants what is best for us, paradise, and want us to keep ourselves pure, so our journey back to Him, will be easier and grant us reward and acceptance. Ya Allah, grant for us to accept the truth in what is written here and forgive us for our mistakes. Aamen.

It is annoying sometimes, when muslim leaders tell families, to keep their women at home. It is correct that women has a bigger responsibility when it comes to raising children. But we can’t close our eyes to the society we are co-existing in.

Your Opinion Matters

Number 1. The first matter spouses often have disagreement about, is money. Number 2. If there wouldn’t be any females in different professions, the muslim women would have to go to male doctors, male nurses male teachers, males in kindergarden, males in shops for women and etc. At a time where they need to talk with people of the same gender. Number 3. The most marriages in the west need two salaries to be able to pay for their expenses. Number 4. The wifes’ that stay home for the kids upbringing usually have a small social network. In other words, their need to socialize is not met by only going to the mosque sometimes a month. Number 5. Many muslim men doesn’t pay for the expenses of their wife. They do not fulfill their duty of providing for her and giving her a certain amount every month etc. Number 6. Instead of holding back our women from work because of their hijab, why do we not at least educate muslim men, to treat other muslim women within the boundaries of haya, modesty, lowering gaze, guarding tongue and private parts? Number 7. Help the women in your family to choose profession where they can be an advantage for the community, while also keep their hijab and modesty, and also be safe, where she is. When Muslim women will take an active part in their work, they will be able to influence decisions that affect muslims in their community. They will help build strong communities. The muslim womens opinion matters. 

The Patient Can Choose The Gender Of The Doctor

If every family told the women to stay home because of Islam, within a few generations muslim women would have far more trouble in going outside. The places where the female gender is necessary would be male-dominated. That could cause more trouble. I don’t know if anyone have been in Pakistan lately. There is a reason why they have built malls (shops) for females only. Or in a specific timing, only females are allowed to go inside the mall. That means only female workers will attend them. In that way, they do not have unwanted attention that decrease their freedom. And the safety of women is also safeguarded. Imagine, a woman doctor in Norway, can`t choose to only have female patients. She has to treat both genders. Neutrally with haya, of course. If there weren`t any female asian lady doctors, many asian women today, might not be able to get the proper help they needed. In the time of the Prophet pbuh, many sahabi took part in the battles where muslims fought. Sometimes as nurses bandaging the wounded and also as fighting the enemies. It`s in our islamic heritage. The community need more women to take part in building healthy communities. Islam does not dismiss women working. It just want both genders to practice the ethics of Islam at work and school, as at home.

The Beauty Is In The Perfection

I believe Islam is beautiful. I love Islam. Alhamdolillah. But sometimes we have to be a bit practical. Islam is perfect. But the practice of Islam in the ummah, makes it look ugly. A dai (preacher of Islam) once said. There was a time when muslims practised Islam in such a way, people said, look at so- and so- to motivate other muslims. Nowadays the name is often muslim, but the practice is so poor, that when we talk to some people who are interested in learning about Islam, we tell them to learn it from the Quran and sunnah. Go back to the real source. Don’t look at muslims, who doesn’t pray, and lies, and backbites and earn money in a haram manner. Their practice is not islamic. I`m sure many muslims knows families where the whole family has been muslims for at least three generations, yet still neither of the generations is following even the basics of Islam. Yet they call themselves muslims.

Lets Look At The World

In some countries, wagons of the public transport, is different between the genders. To prevent harassment of women. Some countries have been talking about it. In Afghanistan, a woman goes out with niqab and all her body covered. Even the face. Still these women are harassed there. It is because the men aren`t lowering their gazes and practising haya. In india, group-rape of women, and rape in general is widely spread. In egypt, women have their undergarments teared off in the street, by men walking by. It is not enough to keep women at home to protect them from assault. Parents must teach both sons and daughters how to behave within the boundaries of Islam. Haya, hijab, lowering gaze, and less interaction. If these men were taught good values from their childhood, many of them would have had a good character. It`s not enough to name your son as a muslim, if you don`t teach him good values, than it will be your own loss. Remember in many countries, women are wearing hijab, yet are still being harassed. Obviously the men must also lower their gaze and protect their private parts, and practice modesty.

First Look At Your References

Keeping the women at home, to protect them isn`t the answer here. It is the time of internet, YouTube, snapchat, Skype. Filth can be found, in the media, within your home. With free time, and boringness, many people can go astray. Ya Allah, protect us. Aamen. If you don`t teach your children to fear Allah, they can easily get misguided. The reason why such, problems are on the increase is because we think just knowing Islam is enough. That`s completely wrong. Even non-muslims know about Islam. Many times more than many muslims. Yet they don`t accept it in their heart nor do they practise it. We muslims accept the message, but do not live according to it. It is not enough to know that salah is important. Unless you pray the prayers every day, you will not be granted khusho, or the sweetness of salah. That which is the coolness of Hazoor Paak ‎ﷺ  and his biggest comfort in hardships. We need a spiritual awakening of the ummah. Where we also are doing the good we know. It`s like when your supervisor is going to hire a new colleague. No one hires a new employ based on what they know. Even if they have a master degree. First they look at their references. Do they have practise from the subjects they have studied. That`s why most people have many difficulties finding their first job. To have that first reference, that will open doors for better opportunities. When we improve on our sprituality we will practice islam also in private, not only in public. The wisdom of Islam comes from practising what you have learned, not just talking about it.

Housewife From Back Home

Many women in arrange marriages, who travel to norway, with their spouse, live at home for the first 10 years of their marriage. In Pakistan still many women are housewifes. Many gain weight. Many sleep the day and wakes after mid-day. No specific routine of day. The social life in Pakistan is better than in Norway.  A wife that is married to a pakistani here in norway, often have small social circles, and have to start from scratch, in building network. After these women have stayed home the first ten years of their marriage, raising children, they are often very eager to start an employment. Socialize with other. The children doesn`t need them that much. Their expenses have increased or not paid by their husband. Very little social life at home. Many eagerly start learning the language of their country. In hope of a job. Many health issues from poor diet. These women, most of them, wants to get out more. They have lived the life of being a housewife, in Norway. Their problems are underrated. Few talk about it. Many are also struggling in their marriage.

The Community Need Muslim Women In Many Professions

We can live in a bubble and think that this is what we want. Unless the world is able to offer it, we have to seek insight in the reality of our time today. Keeping women at home, is not the only option. First parents need to educate both genders about ethics of islam. Cultivate in them fear of Allah. Help them choose good friends and good education according to their gender. If you really want to protect your wife from the ill of this community, talk with others about how we can educate men and sons to practice islam also outside the home. Social life in norway is very different from Pakistan, and many wife`s lead a very deppressive life, staying home as housewifes. Help them choose profession where they can utilize their abilities, earn salary, socialize. All this within the boundaries of Islam. All this will help the muslim women increase their  quality of life. They will be happier. Active. Learning. Changing. Growing as people. Know more about the society they live in. That is important to raise good obedient children. They can positively  influence the development of our community. Ya Allah, help the community succeed in making it easy for muslim women, if they wish, to have an employment where they can use their qualities, while also taking care of all of her duties at home. Aamen 

If your husband has female “friends”, you will have problems in your marriage. 

If your wife has male “friends” you will have problems in your life.

There is no need to socialize more than necessary with the opposite gender. It will lead to fitnah. No one is immune to fitnah, no matter how many masters or bachelors they have in their cv. That is one of the main reasons why mixing between genders is prohibited in Islam. 

If it can’t be avoided because of work, at least minimize it to the bear minimum, and be as proffesional as possible. Nothing breaks the heart of a spouse more than realizing that his / her spouse  is engaging with others in non-islamic ways. 

I can’t understand why there is any need to have friends from the other gender. These friendships ruin lives. Infatuation. Many wrongs happen when fitnah is not stopped. 

May Allah protect all marriages. And keep us pure, from having friendships with the opposite gender. And protect us from jeopardize our marriage for anything else. Aameen. 

verden-i-blomster-world-in-flowersNestekjærlighet finnes i alle religioner. Være en flott borger, nabo, venn, kollega, medmenneske, familie. Å praktisere medmenneskelighet går på tvers av kultur, religion, kjønn, etniske bakgrunn. Når man viser godhet/omtanke om andre via medmenneskelighet så betyr det som oftest ikke at en er forelsket i det menneske. Det betyr kun at du ønsker at det menneske skal leve et godt liv. Ønske et godt liv til andre, slik som en ønsker for seg selv, viser at vi har et godt hjerte. Å rekke ut en hånd til noen som trenger det, er det som får verden til å gå rundt. Nestekjærlighet og positivitet. Uten dette i et samfunn, hadde det blitt tøft å overleve. Jeg er så takknemlige for at det finnes mange ok mennesker her i verden. 👍

Og du som leser dette er en av dem 🙂

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My Prayer..

“O Allah, place light in my heart, and on my tongue light, and in my ears light and in my sight light, and above me light, and below me light, and to my right light, and to my left light, and before me light and behind me light. Place in my soul light. Magnify for me light, and amplify for me light. Make for me light and make me a light. O Allah, grant me light, and place light in my nerves, and in my body light and in my blood light and in my hair light and in my skin light.” Ameen

Bukhari and Muslim

Calender

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Surah 105 Al Fil

Let not man be intoxicated with power, Or material resourses, They cannot defeat. The purpose of Allah. So Abrahah Ashram Found to his cost. His sacrilegious attack On the holy Fane of Allah brought about His own undoing:what seemed but frail Destroyed his mighty hosts in a day!

The foolproof tip of the day for everyone else!

USE YOUR OWN VOICE TO RAISE YOUR OPINION!

Nasiyat..

(",) My Mum always says that
you should marry someone
who loves you more than you
love him, because that man
would never ever make you cry
or be the reason that your
sheding tears. He would do
anything to always keep you
happy and satisfied (",)

Poetry

(“,) Your heart is mine and mine is yours, and so it`s been since I`ve known love`s true meaning itself, holding each others hand we stand together beneath the lovely sky, gazing towards the same destiny, just U and I (“,)

Naat/hamd-Quote of the moment :)

Saari duniya ke liye dard
se mahmor hain jo..
Ik faqat Rehmat-e-aalam
hi ka seena dekha..

Ye sab tumhara
karam hain Aka
ke baat ab tak
bani hoyi hain..

Ehsas dein toofik dein..
Phir jazbaen Siddiq dein..

Kya ye zarra likhein
Shaan Unki, jin pe
bejhein Salaam
khud Khudai..

Quote of the moment :)

Though we might sometimes
have to struggle through thick
or thin,We will receive each
other’s support to be there to
win..And we will blossom like
this through eternity..
InshaAllah
Ameen summa ameen

Når du er forent med en
du elsker, er det ingenting
du ikke klarer :)

Gode ord skaper tillit.
Gode tanker skaper
Inderlighet. God
giverglede skaper
kjærlighet:)

Mood :)

Content.