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Sisterhood, brotherhood, world, earth, united, care jpgMost people with a caring nature and good values, would happily give a helping hand to anyone in difficulty, even if they wouldn`t personally know who the other person is. Sometimes without even thinking of it having any consequence for themselves in the future.

Are You Careful Who You Help?

As time has become more rough and many people are in difficulties nowadays, many people with good intentions of helping others, are experiencing corruption in many cases. Many examples are known from the media, were good and caring people help others in need and are in return either hurt or somehow criminals steal their belongings. Leaving them in worse case, than if they would`ve not cared and just walked away, like they didn`t see that someone needed help. Since the rise of corruption is at its peak, many good people are now very aware of the fact that they have to be careful who they trust and help. Giving a helpful hand, is not the same as for a few years ago. The consequence is of course that people who are entitled of help, doesn`t get any help they need. Because we don`t know if they are true/sincere. So we choose to do a background check before we send any money or give charity through any company. We don`t always know if the money is truly being utilized where it was sent for.

Ulterior Motives For Helpfulness

When our parents bring us to life in this world. They do not bring us in order to make us dependent of them. Most parents want us to be able to live a good life and be independent. If we are too dependent of them, one day when they no more, we would have difficulty adapting to this. Their goal is to raise children who can contribute positively to the community, muslims and non-muslims. If a police-woman sees a man wanting to take suicide from a bridge, and she manages to talk him out of it, believing that he has a purpose in life, even though it looks a bit dark right now, doesn`t mean that the police-woman had ulterior motives for being helpful. It is her duty. So when some people help other people, because of their softheartedness, believe in the good in them. Most of us are just practising the life of our Prophet pbuh. We can`t start spinning on the idea that she saved him, because she wants to marry him or would want some money in return for being helpful.

politenessWe Want Humanity To Win

Good-natured people are helping. Although so many countries are facing severe trials. Lets not be the reason why people stop believing in goodness. A life is precious no matter whose it is. To save a life is like saving humankind, and to take a life, is like killing mankind. -Quran 5:32. Allah sees and knows those who do good. Don`t come in the way of others success. If someone has helped you through a difficult situation, just supplicating for them when you pray, would be sufficient for you to repay the favour. You don`t have to be a part of their life for it. It so happens often that when someone from the opposite gender helps us, we think they help us because they love us etc. It is important that we regain believe in kindness. Not always mistaking kindness /politeness for flirtation/love. Bottom line, kind people with a sound heart and good intentions help others out of difficulty. That`s it. Nothing more. Don`t expect or put so much in a nice gesture that because of this, people stop doing good deeds. If we get the idea that a good gesture will backfire, goodness will decrease. People falling on a sidewalk, where thousands are walking, won`t be helped by anyone. We don`t want that kind of world? We want a safe world where people help each other. No matter if anyone is rich or poor, just because we want humanity to win. If people fear for their family’s security when they help other people, they might stop helping other people in need. We don`t want such a society. Very few people are so un-selfish that they dare to risk their loved ones lives in order to save someone they barely know. Our a priority is our family. May Allah make it easy for us to practice kindness without it backfiring. Aameen.

rose, quality muslimah, islam, conduct, knowledge, wisdom, practice Islam, understandI have met so many amazing muslimahs the last 9 years. Women who has so much to offer, yet their resourcefulness is not being utilized. Their lives would have been so much more meaningful, if their family had backed them more. Let me explain more.

The Help They Need

A wife`s first priority after marriage is her husband, and after some time their children. In most asian muslim families, where daughters are brought from back home to the west. It take many years to help them adapt to the society here. Some learn the language easily, while others might never ever be able to pass test to be able to work. Although it is the family`s responsibility that these women are helped through there first years here, many times they do not get the help they need.

First Of All Imagine.

You have a network of family and friends back home. When you come here, you not only have to adapt into a whole new family but also build your own new network. That is not always that easy. Especially for wives, when they often get busy with parenthood, before they are able to learn the language properly. They have to postpone their own dreams in order for the family. I might dare say, many women come back to school, years afterwards, where they tell how much they also wanted to utilize their life for something more meaningful than just stay home with children and the little network they have or might not have. They have dreams to also earn a living, using their resources to earn money and buy things without always thinking of their expenditures. A little more planning and help from the husband could have made their situation easier.

Being A Mother Is Very Giving

Every woman has dreams of her own. Apart from being a mother and a wife. Doing something meaningful that is important to here. Having a social life, friends, network, buying things she need, without always have to ask for permission, or to be able to have women only evenings with her friends. Husband doesn`t realize that if they would support their wife more in achieving her dreams and some sort of independence, she would become a much better wife for him and a better mother for her children. Often times when women get married, they give little precedence to their own needs. Their husband needs come first. Than their children’s needs. Then their in-laws preferences. After a list, at the end their own needs come, if they have any energy or time to spend for themselves. For a mother to give her children to her husband and have a friends dinner out, is if i might dare say, not the reality for many asian wives. Although the husband in the same family, has at least one day a week, he can enjoy with this friends. If not many more. Even though the parenthood is both parents responsebility, often the mothers take the most heaviest burdens. They have a such job, that they never get any time off. It`s a 24/7 on work for their family.

Education Going To Waste

When husbands stop their wifes from getting a job or an education or to work when they have a sound education. They should re-think what they are doing. If and when the parents of a muslimah doctor had thought the same. The wife of these husbands had to meet a male doctor at the hospital for a check up under her pregnancy. Thank god, that some parents encourage their daughters to get a decent education with good values so that they can contribute to the community. We have muslimah doctors, nurses, teachers, dentists, engineers and so on. It is not easy for them to go out of their home and work. Their best hijab is in their home. But yet we must not forget that if every muslimah had thought that, our own muslimah wives, would have had difficulty getting any good help, without meeting their own “tribe”, when they need some sort of help/assistance. We can`t stop these resources from contributing positively for the society, and be so selfish and only think about our own good. Of course that comes first, but we must also try to help others, whom might have more difficult life than ourselves.

Muslimah`s And Islam – The Sunnah Way

Under the time when the prophet Muhammad pbuh had to do hijrah to medina with Abu bakr Siddiq raa, they left makkah and passed by cave thawr. They stayed there for a few days to protect themselves from their enemies. The daughter of Abu Bakr siddiq raa, Asma Bint Abu Bakr, came to them with food-supplies, through difficult roads and facing many dangers. The muslimah sahabi`s have helped Islam not by being passively at home, but by being with the muslims in wars, also fighting the enemies and taking care of those wounded. So you see it is not Islam that oppresses women, it is the illiterate minds. Even knowledgable people can be illiterate for not being able to believe in what is right and haqq. If knowledge opened minds of everyone than the most knowledgable lecturers would have accepted Islam. Not everyone does. Even in the most intelligent people there are many who doesn`t accept what is right for what is right and what is truth for what is truth. I believe that if you as a mailman have managed to find your way to Allah and believe in him and try to enjoin good and forbid evil, you are more intelligent than the lecturer with a phd, that thinks that Islam is not haqq or right. I have learned to calculate people, from how faithful and obedient they are to Islam. Islam doesn`t oppress women. Mostly the wrong culture does. May Allah give all wives help to realize their dream in their life. And make all the muslimah`s resourceful for each other and helping each other prosper. And guide husband to be more supportive of their wife. The sunnah way. Aameen summa aameen.

positive parents, children, upbringingGood and bad health is in the hands of our Creator. There is also something we have in our hands to change the situation. Many people know the right of the parents and talk and praise those who treat them well. Though we need to talk more about how parents should treat their children also. Their childhood shape them for their adulthood. If we want them to be good contributors as adults, we nee to know how to mould them into what we want them to become. I have a few thoughts about this, I would like to share.

Children Above Their Age

Children need to learn the parents rights. The parents also should be aware of the children’s rights. If a childs` opinion is validated, and their parents make them feel like they can contribute to the conversation, even with their little intellect at the moment. They would be able to, see with amazement, that many times children say words that are above their age, and good for the conversation. It is the parents that build the childs` confidence in the beginning. Just like any spouse want un-divided attention, children also need a good dose of positive attention, love, care and nurture from their parents. If the parents are able to show this in a good way, they help build healthy people who are an asset for the community and the people they interact with.

parents recognize childrens abilites and efforts,Don`t Downplay Their Abilities

It is so easy to for a parent to say to a child, don`t be disrespectful. Though the parents must also realize that if you treat he/she with respect, and teach them how to behave in a good way, with encouragement, they will. If the only way to get any attention is when children does something wrong, of course, the child that need validation, would do anything for it. To bring out good qualities in our children, we must comment positively and take out time to listen to them and reason with them, to help them think good. Not only teaching them what to think, but how to think right. Don`t downplay their abilities. That is where they learn to downplay their own abilities, in their relations as adults. At the time a child is born, it is like a white sheet. Whatever it becomes and how it behaves depends on the values that are cultivated in him/her. The parents need to realize their responsibilities before it is too late. Encourage your children and see them blossom. Build confidence and self-esteem while keeping them humble and filled with humility and gratefulness. Knowing that good would not happen to them without the will and help of Allah and hard work. When they don`t win the game, appreciate their efforts, because they worked hard. We need to raise children that will be good for the community, muslims and non muslims, but most importantly, good for Islam. May Allah help all elders and children value and respect each other and fulfil their rights and obligations towards each other in a sunnah way and help them become resourceful for the community and to each other.

siblings, brother, sister, sur, little brotherHaving children is a great blessing for parents. To pass on the legacy of Islam to another generation that will live Islam. Often both parents prefer sons over daughters. Mainly because they think that they will be the most supportive because they become providers too. They have forgotten that Prophet Muhammad pbuh`s legacy was passed on by his daughter Fatima raa.

 

Pray For Piousness

Parents shouldn`t focus on the gender of the child, but rather praying for it to be a good muslim/muslimah. Praying for pious children even before marriage shows that you are responsible and worried about their Hereafter. Instead of competing in numbers or a specific gender, rather be motivated to increase the quality of upbringing. We don`t always know whether a son will be more valuable than a daughter. Allah is going to send tribulations through our sustenance. We will meet both difficulties and ease. Thinking that those who have daughters are less blessed is wrong. Most parents realize later in life that daughters are a greater blessing. Mostly because of their softheartedness and emotional intelligence they take better care of their family/parents, compared to their sons.

 

Practice Equality In Giving

Often people with children from both genders, prefer the son more than the daughter. Prophet Muhammad pbuh was once sitting with some sahaba when one sahabi`s daughter came and she seated herself beside him. A while after his son came, he kissed him and let him sit on the lap. When the Prophet pbuh saw this he said that we can`t treat our children differently, but they should be treated equally. If you give a gift to one, the gift has to be given the other siblings. If not they will be questioned about that on the Day of Judgement. When Fatima raa visited Prophet Muhammad pbuh, he pbuh would kiss her hand and let her have his pbuh seat. She would return the gesture to him pbuh, when he pbuh visited her. He pbuh was also helpful in the house. Even if times have changes some men doesn`t help as much as they should. Learning about the sunnah might motivate men to do more.

 

When Allah withholds A Gift

It is Allah whom chooses sons for some and daughter for others. We can`t complain to Him and question His Wisdom behind the decision. Whatever Allah gives us, be grateful in good times and show patience in difficult times. There will be both. The happiest people are those who are content with the little they are blessed with. Being happy with the decree of Allah shows our dependency and trust in Him. He is the one in Control. We can draw a comparison through the lesson where a child is in his mother’s lap and wants to touch the fire. The mother knows that if he touches the fire, he will burn himself. The child doesn`t know that. The mother because of the love for her child, will keep him away from the fire. It is the same with every blessing. Sometimes Allah withholds something from us because He think something can hurt us through it. Other time He withholds to give us a bigger gift or to purify us and raise our status before we are given a gift.

 

Every Child Is Precious

Be fair to your children and express your love to them often.  Make them feel loved, so they are not misled by people. Fill their bucket of confidence. Don`t hesitate to motivate them when they are down, or gently correct them when they need to be advised. Teach them good values to make them a contribute for the Ummah and their community. Through your efforts in their early years they can be a sadqah jariyah for you. Most of all treat them equally. Sibling rivalry can easily be controlled if the parents are fair between them and each child gets quality time alone with parents, so they don`t feel neglected. The other siblings won`t get jealous of the love they are giving. Gently advising them privately is the best way of getting any changes in their behaviour that can be improved for the future.

 

If you want to compete, compete about those things that matters. Not only in your life but also in your Hereafter. Ready, set, go!

starting line, race, competition

  1. Instead of competing about things in dunya, compete about ranks in the Hereafter.
  2. Instead of making apparent others faults, conceal them, so that Allah will conceal your faults on Judgement Day, when it matters the most.
  3. Instead of beautifying your looks, improve your character, because in the end, your looks  won`t do you any good if your character isn`t well.
  4. Instead of competing about having a lot of kids, compete in teaching them good values, so that they become good people and great contributors to the society.
  5. Instead of competing about having the biggest salary, compete about having sakina in your life.
  6. Instead of bragging about how many friends you have, compete for the friends that matters, those that will join you in Jannah and help you gain it.
  7. Instead of making a show of your good deeds, make sure you have become a better person than what you were yesterday, or just the other minute.
  8. Instead of bringing others down because of envy/jealousy, try to make see the beautiful things in your own life, because we all have good things in our life.
  9. Instead of competing about having the biggest house or a brand new car, compete about attaining a house in Jannah that is close to Prophet Muhammad pbuh.
  10. Instead of competing about buying the most expensive gifts, compete about giving those things that gives the greatest impact on others life, things money can`t buy, like good values, time, knowledge that will benefit, support in bad times and righteous company.
  11. Instead of bragging about your good deeds, be afraid of the fact whether they are accepted or not, may Allah give us barakah in our lives.
  12. Instead of pointing fingers and questioning others` intention, think good thoughts about your brothers and sisters in Islam. Let your life be an inspiration, and leave the judging to Allah.
  13. When racing about doing the most ibaadah, remember that you also have a responsibility to your family, friends, relatives. In order to please Allah, make sure you don`t neglect them. We will be questioned about that also.
May Allah accept our good deeds, forgive us our faults, give us barakah in our life and join us with the righteous in this life and the Hereafter. Ameen summa ameen.

 

race, finish line, win, athletics

womens rights in islamIf a female member of your family had a doctor’s appointment, I`m sure you would have preferred it, that she was going to a female doctor. If your daughters wanted to learn swimming, I`m sure you would want the teacher to be a female. If we want less issues for girls/women in this society, we would have preferred that there were some women in the places where they interact the most.

It is so weird that people want their girls to be educated, but after their marriage, most of them has to stay home. Men want doctors as their wife, but yet would prefer it if she stayed home. What is the point of taken a degree if you`re not going to make it of any use? If we want the women of this Ummah to be active in the community we have to help them through the hurdles of everyday life so that they also can contribute. Because they have a lot of potential, and should be heard.

When we let the girls and women of this Ummah take an education or work, we have to know that they are going outside of the safe zone “home”. We need to make sure that they are safe. They will meet all kinds of people be it at workplace or at the university. Some people would look at them with the wrong intentions. We need to prepare them for how they are going to react to that, how they can prevent it, and if they come in a dangerous situation, how to get out of it.

Some points that can keep you safe :

  1. Correct hijab is very important. A least it would minimize the dangers.
  2. Girls/women should learn self-defence.
  3. Walk in groups.
  4. Ask your parents to pick you from the station. If it`s dark outside and late.
  5. When you`re alone, don`t take shortcuts through the forest.
  6. Walk where there are people.
  7. Don`t talk with strangers.
  8. Always let your family know where you are and who you`re with.
  9. Stay away from cars that stop by to ask the address of any place.
  10. Another thing that is quite important is that, just because there are other people in a place, doesn`t make it safe. I heard about some young boys here in Norway, who were drowning. They called for help. Even though there were people there that heard them, no one helped them.

These point will at least minimize the risks. Girls /women has to be cautious wherever they are and whoever they`re with.

Just think about it, if you raise a daughter/sister and she becomes a doctor, teacher, nurse, scientist or anything similar within the boundaries of Islam, she would be a powerful contributor to the community. We need people in the community that helps the Ummah rise again. To help them through their difficulties. Every good deed she does, even if it is in her job-description, you would reap a reward as well, because you made it possible for her. Every person she helps, good deeds will be transferred to your account, without it decreasing in her own reward. You can do the calculation. Allahu Akbar ❤

May Allah give us barakah in our lives, keep us steadfast on the deen, help and guide us throughout our lives, accept our good deeds and sincere efforts and give us inspiration to help the Ummah rise out of every problem. ❤ Ameen summa ameen.

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My Prayer..

“O Allah, place light in my heart, and on my tongue light, and in my ears light and in my sight light, and above me light, and below me light, and to my right light, and to my left light, and before me light and behind me light. Place in my soul light. Magnify for me light, and amplify for me light. Make for me light and make me a light. O Allah, grant me light, and place light in my nerves, and in my body light and in my blood light and in my hair light and in my skin light.” Ameen

Bukhari and Muslim

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Surah 105 Al Fil

Let not man be intoxicated with power, Or material resourses, They cannot defeat. The purpose of Allah. So Abrahah Ashram Found to his cost. His sacrilegious attack On the holy Fane of Allah brought about His own undoing:what seemed but frail Destroyed his mighty hosts in a day!

The foolproof tip of the day for everyone else!

USE YOUR OWN VOICE TO RAISE YOUR OPINION!

Nasiyat..

(",) My Mum always says that
you should marry someone
who loves you more than you
love him, because that man
would never ever make you cry
or be the reason that your
sheding tears. He would do
anything to always keep you
happy and satisfied (",)

Poetry

(“,) Your heart is mine and mine is yours, and so it`s been since I`ve known love`s true meaning itself, holding each others hand we stand together beneath the lovely sky, gazing towards the same destiny, just U and I (“,)

Naat/hamd-Quote of the moment :)

Saari duniya ke liye dard
se mahmor hain jo..
Ik faqat Rehmat-e-aalam
hi ka seena dekha..

Ye sab tumhara
karam hain Aka
ke baat ab tak
bani hoyi hain..

Ehsas dein toofik dein..
Phir jazbaen Siddiq dein..

Kya ye zarra likhein
Shaan Unki, jin pe
bejhein Salaam
khud Khudai..

Quote of the moment :)

Though we might sometimes
have to struggle through thick
or thin,We will receive each
other’s support to be there to
win..And we will blossom like
this through eternity..
InshaAllah
Ameen summa ameen

Når du er forent med en
du elsker, er det ingenting
du ikke klarer :)

Gode ord skaper tillit.
Gode tanker skaper
Inderlighet. God
giverglede skaper
kjærlighet:)

Mood :)

Content.