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In the first years of our school, we learned about limits of interaction with other children. Our teacher told us that every child has an invisible boundary around us. Every child has different people who are allowed to cross that boundary. Since every child is different, and some children are more shy than others, some have a bigger circle of boundary around them. That means that if we were to talk with such a child, he/she would feel comfortable if we had some extra distance between him/her and us, while speaking. Other outgoing children can have a circle that is closer to their body, so you can stand much closer to them, and they would still feel comfortable having a conversation. So our teachers told us, some people are allowed to come into the circle, like our parents, siblings, closets friends. If anyone crosses our boundary, without permission, then we must be strong, and able to speak up and remove ourselves from the situation. Teachers made up an example of a situation, and children were taught how to remove themselves from the treath.

I think it is very important that this is taught to children and teens. So they are aware of it. Make them strong and able to protect their own boundaries. and not allowing any outsider to cross them. Ya Allah, make it easy for us to protect ourself. Ya Allah protect every ummati, from those who cross their boundaries, without permission. Aameen

positive parents, children, upbringingGood and bad health is in the hands of our Creator. There is also something we have in our hands to change the situation. Many people know the right of the parents and talk and praise those who treat them well. Though we need to talk more about how parents should treat their children also. Their childhood shape them for their adulthood. If we want them to be good contributors as adults, we nee to know how to mould them into what we want them to become. I have a few thoughts about this, I would like to share.

Children Above Their Age

Children need to learn the parents rights. The parents also should be aware of the children’s rights. If a childs` opinion is validated, and their parents make them feel like they can contribute to the conversation, even with their little intellect at the moment. They would be able to, see with amazement, that many times children say words that are above their age, and good for the conversation. It is the parents that build the childs` confidence in the beginning. Just like any spouse want un-divided attention, children also need a good dose of positive attention, love, care and nurture from their parents. If the parents are able to show this in a good way, they help build healthy people who are an asset for the community and the people they interact with.

parents recognize childrens abilites and efforts,Don`t Downplay Their Abilities

It is so easy to for a parent to say to a child, don`t be disrespectful. Though the parents must also realize that if you treat he/she with respect, and teach them how to behave in a good way, with encouragement, they will. If the only way to get any attention is when children does something wrong, of course, the child that need validation, would do anything for it. To bring out good qualities in our children, we must comment positively and take out time to listen to them and reason with them, to help them think good. Not only teaching them what to think, but how to think right. Don`t downplay their abilities. That is where they learn to downplay their own abilities, in their relations as adults. At the time a child is born, it is like a white sheet. Whatever it becomes and how it behaves depends on the values that are cultivated in him/her. The parents need to realize their responsibilities before it is too late. Encourage your children and see them blossom. Build confidence and self-esteem while keeping them humble and filled with humility and gratefulness. Knowing that good would not happen to them without the will and help of Allah and hard work. When they don`t win the game, appreciate their efforts, because they worked hard. We need to raise children that will be good for the community, muslims and non muslims, but most importantly, good for Islam. May Allah help all elders and children value and respect each other and fulfil their rights and obligations towards each other in a sunnah way and help them become resourceful for the community and to each other.

svane familieMany people often neglect children’s need to be seen and heard and valued for who they are, where their abilities are appreciated regardless of their siblings or friends achievements. A childs joy, when their parents listen attentively, and value all the siblings individually, when they are together as a family, is important. Often we wonder why some adults are so quiet and not into talking that much. When they grow up amongst many siblings, where some are very dominating, it is obvious that other doesn`t get that much chance to blossom or show their abilities. It could lead to they not cultivate their talents as much as their potential. People in general grow better in the right environment. Since everyone has different needs, we grow the best in different places. Seeing your child as the individual he/she is and value them for who they are, without comparison to other, is important.

 

Undiscovered Potential

Sitting at the dinner table with the family, and giving everyone chance to respond and talk to the family, is must, no matter how old they are, because their opinions need to be valued, to make them feel that they also have important opinions. Who hasn`t heard a toddler or a young child say something that is beyond his/her age. By excluding some children from the conversations, we can damage their self-esteem, and prevent them from believing in themselves. The saying “ghar ki murghi daal barabar”, is quite funny and accurate to prove the point. People outside of the family, sees so much potential in a child, while within the family, he/she can be neglected.

 

Values Are More Important Than Education

Our parents might have had this way of raising us. If we havent learned from their mistakes, we have not learned anything worthwhile. What can be more important than moulding our next generation into beautiful/giving people with good values who has the confidence to stand for what they believe in. I`m sure if we ask our friends all of them has something to point out about how they got raised by their parents. Good solid education won`t do any good for anyone, if the conduct, character, morals, manners, self-esteem etc are not cultivated and sound.

 

When You Are On Right, You Will Be Rewarded

Teaching children that nothing comes in this world without hard work. There is no elevator to success, everyone has to take the stairs, one step at a time, as long as you work hard and abide by the rules, you are a winner, no matter the outcome. Even if others doesn`t value your efforts know that Allah sees your struggles and will reward you, in this life and next. A good environment starts at home and as the child grows older other places like kindergarten, school, college, work and friends will have an impact on them. If we don`t cheer our children for their achievements, no matter how small, they will find someone who does. And that someone isn`t necessarily a good influence on them. For them to have a solid confidence to say no to bad things, they must have a good dose of self-esteem and confidence, that is taught from their early years. When children realize that Allah will reward, they will turn to Him, instead of other people for validation. Help them see the beauty in their conduct and character not their appearance. Having a rich character, makes one feel good. The only way to feel good is to know that you are doing something right, and having trust that you will be rewarded for it by Allah.

 

 

happy feetSee, Hear And Value Your Children

Treat them as individuals. Cheering them for having good conduct, character, and filling their bucket of esteem and confidence, and cultivating good values in them, will help them in all their struggles in life. Helping them believe in themselves will make it easier for them to cope with challenges. There is no bigger favour a parent can do for his/her child. Being fair so that no one is excluded and everyone gets a fair chance to speak, is important. It proclaims a message of equality. We need to be fair when some of the children are more dominating. When we teach children to listen to each other, they will of course do that. Growing up in an environment where we can`t express our views without fear of being ridiculed by other siblings, is damaging. The parents can make rules for a healthy conversation/discussion at home and make sure that they are also followed. Since the parents are the shepherds of the family, they need to make sure that their children are under good care and that their individual needs are filled and they are given space where they grow best. They will be questioned about their care, from Allah.

internet, teenager, family,We often get so consumed in this materialistic world, that we tend to forget what is important in our life: Our Loved Ones ❤ I was taught a lesson in this regard.

For a couple a days now we are renewing the living room. We haven`t had any internet or telephone since a couple of days. But we have our mobile phones in case of an emergency. These couple of days has made me realize a few things. Now as we don`t have internet or television and no living room, we have to eat in the kitchen. No distractions. No one is watching the news 24/7. We have to what they say, look at each other and actually have a conversation. It feels like we have met after a long time and are talking about stuff in our life. I haven`t been so content and calm as I am nowadays. We smile, we laugh, we quarrel, we discuss, we talk together and the atmosphere is lovely.

The fact that we often forget our relations because of all kinds of distractions is not rare. Sometimes family members grow so far away because of this that they don`t know each other anymore. I guess in a couple of days, everything will be like it was, and we`ll become busy in our lives. These days have taught me the true value of the relations in my life.
Simple life = Happy life and No television = Happy wife.

Our relations are important in our life. Not our job, hobby, interests etc, but rather the people who make our life worth living. Even if we don`t always agree with them about everything. Just admit it, if it wouldn`t have been for our family and loved ones, we would most certainly not have been what we are today and where we are today. ❤ It is a blessing, cherish it, and tell them. ❤

These small incidents that wakes us, once in a while, makes an impact on our thinking. We realize what our priorities are. When we first have realized that, what is important is to keep that thought and not let it fade away. As some people say, sometimes life knocks you down on your knees, little do we know, that the same position is perfect for sujood. Allah wants us to ask Him.

Check out and click on site www . Purify Your Gaze . com

https://purifyyourgaze.com/

My Prayer..

“O Allah, place light in my heart, and on my tongue light, and in my ears light and in my sight light, and above me light, and below me light, and to my right light, and to my left light, and before me light and behind me light. Place in my soul light. Magnify for me light, and amplify for me light. Make for me light and make me a light. O Allah, grant me light, and place light in my nerves, and in my body light and in my blood light and in my hair light and in my skin light.” Ameen

Bukhari and Muslim

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Surah 105 Al Fil

Let not man be intoxicated with power, Or material resourses, They cannot defeat. The purpose of Allah. So Abrahah Ashram Found to his cost. His sacrilegious attack On the holy Fane of Allah brought about His own undoing:what seemed but frail Destroyed his mighty hosts in a day!

The foolproof tip of the day for everyone else!

USE YOUR OWN VOICE TO RAISE YOUR OPINION!

Nasiyat..

(",) My Mum always says that
you should marry someone
who loves you more than you
love him, because that man
would never ever make you cry
or be the reason that your
sheding tears. He would do
anything to always keep you
happy and satisfied (",)

Poetry

(“,) Your heart is mine and mine is yours, and so it`s been since I`ve known love`s true meaning itself, holding each others hand we stand together beneath the lovely sky, gazing towards the same destiny, just U and I (“,)

Naat/hamd-Quote of the moment :)

Saari duniya ke liye dard
se mahmor hain jo..
Ik faqat Rehmat-e-aalam
hi ka seena dekha..

Ye sab tumhara
karam hain Aka
ke baat ab tak
bani hoyi hain..

Ehsas dein toofik dein..
Phir jazbaen Siddiq dein..

Kya ye zarra likhein
Shaan Unki, jin pe
bejhein Salaam
khud Khudai..

Quote of the moment :)

Though we might sometimes
have to struggle through thick
or thin,We will receive each
other’s support to be there to
win..And we will blossom like
this through eternity..
InshaAllah
Ameen summa ameen

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Inderlighet. God
giverglede skaper
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