You are currently browsing the tag archive for the ‘Siblings’ tag.

At work. As doctors, advocates, engineers. We are often very proud of ourselves when we attain some kind of position in society. People who achieve some kind of business or work, with a big salary didn`t come to that point themselves. They probably had many people backing them up. First of all their parents, their siblings, their good friends, and those teachers that guided them to make good decisions in life. Without these people they wouldn`t have been where they are today. Not only these people. Also other people who backed them when they were in difficulty. Prayed for them when they had some kind of troubles. Not only elders. It could have been a supplication of someone whom you hardly know. The same goes when it comes to something good or bad happening in your life, that turns your heart towards Your Creator. When your heart already yearns for Your Creator, you only need a little help, to walk, to join the right path. A muslim brother or sister who encouraged you to pray, a spiritual teacher who helped you remember Allah. and the list goes on.

Each Who Helped Us

Most of these people I have talked about in this text, helped you unconditionally. They expected nothing in return. They helped thinking of you, not themselves. It is very important, that when we achieve some kind of position, that we don`t forget these gems. These gems, who helped us, when we were lost, and needed good advice. They saw the potential in us, when we didn`t believe in us, as much as we do today. The best we can do is, be with them and help them, and do good for them. If that is not possible, than at least pray for them. Supplicate for them, every day. I would certainly not have been where I am today, without those people who believed in me, throughout my life. Ya Allah, have mercy on those who has helped without me knowing it, and while me knowing it. Ya Allah, each who has helped me while me knowing it, or while me not knowing it, grant them infinite blessings in both worlds. Aamen. In every one of every infinite blessing, grant them infinite new blessings of both worlds. Aamen. Guide us to the right path, and keep us firm on the right path. Aamen. Without doubt, Allah is able to do all things. I put my trust in my and your Creator. Allah will suffice me. Aamen. Protect me from those I know are bad for me, and protect me from those I don’t know are bad for me. Accept this for every ummati. Aamen

life is a prison for the believers and a paradise for the disbelieversInstead Of Competing

In every relationship we have to balance between rights and responsibilities. We can`t keep on expecting from others without fulfilling others rights upon us. Without having knowledge of it, we will also have difficulty to deliver. Most of the first generation that came to the West only know what rights they have. Most of the second generation have understood that the first generation hasn`t fulfilled their obligations towards them. How can we know expect to have a healthy, giving relationship between the two?

Parents Have Rights and Responsebilities

It is important that children take the responsibility of caring towards their parents. Likely it is important that the parents should have understood and practiced good parenting from the start. They were to occupied with earning a living. Not understanding that buying things is not the same as spending time cultivating values in the children you have brought into this world. We can`t expect without giving in return. Prophet Muhammad pbuh has talked about the right of the parents but also the responsibility of the parents.

It Is Rare To Find Genuine People

Wanting for your brother what you want for yourself has become a rare phenomena. Mostly sibling rivalry, or jealous friends make it quite difficult to share the good things that happen in our lives. The evil eye is real. People have found a passion in competing with each other, rather than helping each other prosper. It is so rare, to find someone whom is genuine in regards of wanting the best for us.

Chose The Easiest Matter, As Long As It Was Halal

In between all this our culture is not making our lives easier either. Clashes between culture and religion, makes difficulties in our lives. People give more consideration to what people might say rather than what Islam has to say. Between two matters, Prophet Muhammad pbuh, always chose the easiest, as long as it was halal. Nowadays people have made halal difficult for people whom want to live pure, because of our self-made rules. The world is indeed a prison for the believer and a paradise for the disbeliever. May Allah help the muslims keep the deen easy. And give each other glad tidings, instead of scaring each others away from our religion. Aameen.

svane familieMany people often neglect children’s need to be seen and heard and valued for who they are, where their abilities are appreciated regardless of their siblings or friends achievements. A childs joy, when their parents listen attentively, and value all the siblings individually, when they are together as a family, is important. Often we wonder why some adults are so quiet and not into talking that much. When they grow up amongst many siblings, where some are very dominating, it is obvious that other doesn`t get that much chance to blossom or show their abilities. It could lead to they not cultivate their talents as much as their potential. People in general grow better in the right environment. Since everyone has different needs, we grow the best in different places. Seeing your child as the individual he/she is and value them for who they are, without comparison to other, is important.

 

Undiscovered Potential

Sitting at the dinner table with the family, and giving everyone chance to respond and talk to the family, is must, no matter how old they are, because their opinions need to be valued, to make them feel that they also have important opinions. Who hasn`t heard a toddler or a young child say something that is beyond his/her age. By excluding some children from the conversations, we can damage their self-esteem, and prevent them from believing in themselves. The saying “ghar ki murghi daal barabar”, is quite funny and accurate to prove the point. People outside of the family, sees so much potential in a child, while within the family, he/she can be neglected.

 

Values Are More Important Than Education

Our parents might have had this way of raising us. If we havent learned from their mistakes, we have not learned anything worthwhile. What can be more important than moulding our next generation into beautiful/giving people with good values who has the confidence to stand for what they believe in. I`m sure if we ask our friends all of them has something to point out about how they got raised by their parents. Good solid education won`t do any good for anyone, if the conduct, character, morals, manners, self-esteem etc are not cultivated and sound.

 

When You Are On Right, You Will Be Rewarded

Teaching children that nothing comes in this world without hard work. There is no elevator to success, everyone has to take the stairs, one step at a time, as long as you work hard and abide by the rules, you are a winner, no matter the outcome. Even if others doesn`t value your efforts know that Allah sees your struggles and will reward you, in this life and next. A good environment starts at home and as the child grows older other places like kindergarten, school, college, work and friends will have an impact on them. If we don`t cheer our children for their achievements, no matter how small, they will find someone who does. And that someone isn`t necessarily a good influence on them. For them to have a solid confidence to say no to bad things, they must have a good dose of self-esteem and confidence, that is taught from their early years. When children realize that Allah will reward, they will turn to Him, instead of other people for validation. Help them see the beauty in their conduct and character not their appearance. Having a rich character, makes one feel good. The only way to feel good is to know that you are doing something right, and having trust that you will be rewarded for it by Allah.

 

 

happy feetSee, Hear And Value Your Children

Treat them as individuals. Cheering them for having good conduct, character, and filling their bucket of esteem and confidence, and cultivating good values in them, will help them in all their struggles in life. Helping them believe in themselves will make it easier for them to cope with challenges. There is no bigger favour a parent can do for his/her child. Being fair so that no one is excluded and everyone gets a fair chance to speak, is important. It proclaims a message of equality. We need to be fair when some of the children are more dominating. When we teach children to listen to each other, they will of course do that. Growing up in an environment where we can`t express our views without fear of being ridiculed by other siblings, is damaging. The parents can make rules for a healthy conversation/discussion at home and make sure that they are also followed. Since the parents are the shepherds of the family, they need to make sure that their children are under good care and that their individual needs are filled and they are given space where they grow best. They will be questioned about their care, from Allah.

love people who dont look at their schedule when you need themOften when something happen to someone you expect a certain reaction to what to what they will say or do. When you give a gift, you expect a positive reaction. When something unexpected happens, since we didn`t know it to happen, we are not aware of what kind of reaction it will create.

 

Bursting Out In Rage

For those whom have younger siblings or children in their family. If and when they fall and get hurt, their parents reaction can be quite different from what is expected. For instance they can be yelled at or even shaken by their elders; “What were you thinking, crossing the road without looking at both sides”. The reaction of their parents, may seem a bit hard, but actually displays that they care. The reason why they burst out in rage, was because they were afraid of you getting hurt. The parents got scared and because of that feeling of being afraid of loosing you, they yelled at you. Instead of thinking that they are to strict, be thankful that they doesn`t want you to hurt yourself, or see you hurt.

 

The value of having someone who cares

Those whom have lost someone in their family knows the value of having somene who cares for you. Someone whom make sure that you`ve had you meal on time, prayed you salat, come home in time, and that you wear clothes according to the weather, are not up to late and that you take care of yourself when you are ill and that you get a good dose of hugs. The ironic thing is that we value people more when they aren`t there than when they are. For years we think that our parents, or elder siblings are really giving us a hard time. But when they are somewhat away, we realize they are the one that has our back, when we fall or something negative happens. The ones that stick with you, when everyone else is out the door, no matter if they are friends or family, those people are the one that truly care. Those that help you not because of what you have, but because they love you no matter what you have or are, unconditionally caring people, are hard to find. Make sure that you appreciate them when you realize who they are, because they are your true treasure.

siblings, brother, sister, sur, little brotherHaving children is a great blessing for parents. To pass on the legacy of Islam to another generation that will live Islam. Often both parents prefer sons over daughters. Mainly because they think that they will be the most supportive because they become providers too. They have forgotten that Prophet Muhammad pbuh`s legacy was passed on by his daughter Fatima raa.

 

Pray For Piousness

Parents shouldn`t focus on the gender of the child, but rather praying for it to be a good muslim/muslimah. Praying for pious children even before marriage shows that you are responsible and worried about their Hereafter. Instead of competing in numbers or a specific gender, rather be motivated to increase the quality of upbringing. We don`t always know whether a son will be more valuable than a daughter. Allah is going to send tribulations through our sustenance. We will meet both difficulties and ease. Thinking that those who have daughters are less blessed is wrong. Most parents realize later in life that daughters are a greater blessing. Mostly because of their softheartedness and emotional intelligence they take better care of their family/parents, compared to their sons.

 

Practice Equality In Giving

Often people with children from both genders, prefer the son more than the daughter. Prophet Muhammad pbuh was once sitting with some sahaba when one sahabi`s daughter came and she seated herself beside him. A while after his son came, he kissed him and let him sit on the lap. When the Prophet pbuh saw this he said that we can`t treat our children differently, but they should be treated equally. If you give a gift to one, the gift has to be given the other siblings. If not they will be questioned about that on the Day of Judgement. When Fatima raa visited Prophet Muhammad pbuh, he pbuh would kiss her hand and let her have his pbuh seat. She would return the gesture to him pbuh, when he pbuh visited her. He pbuh was also helpful in the house. Even if times have changes some men doesn`t help as much as they should. Learning about the sunnah might motivate men to do more.

 

When Allah withholds A Gift

It is Allah whom chooses sons for some and daughter for others. We can`t complain to Him and question His Wisdom behind the decision. Whatever Allah gives us, be grateful in good times and show patience in difficult times. There will be both. The happiest people are those who are content with the little they are blessed with. Being happy with the decree of Allah shows our dependency and trust in Him. He is the one in Control. We can draw a comparison through the lesson where a child is in his mother’s lap and wants to touch the fire. The mother knows that if he touches the fire, he will burn himself. The child doesn`t know that. The mother because of the love for her child, will keep him away from the fire. It is the same with every blessing. Sometimes Allah withholds something from us because He think something can hurt us through it. Other time He withholds to give us a bigger gift or to purify us and raise our status before we are given a gift.

 

Every Child Is Precious

Be fair to your children and express your love to them often.  Make them feel loved, so they are not misled by people. Fill their bucket of confidence. Don`t hesitate to motivate them when they are down, or gently correct them when they need to be advised. Teach them good values to make them a contribute for the Ummah and their community. Through your efforts in their early years they can be a sadqah jariyah for you. Most of all treat them equally. Sibling rivalry can easily be controlled if the parents are fair between them and each child gets quality time alone with parents, so they don`t feel neglected. The other siblings won`t get jealous of the love they are giving. Gently advising them privately is the best way of getting any changes in their behaviour that can be improved for the future.

 

Thank you allah, heartWithout appreciating what people have done for us, and being thankful, we are not appreciating what Allah has done for us. Because when people help us, it is directly sent from Allah. He sends people as blessings and inspire them to help us, in some way. For example there was a person that was drowning in an ocean. He cried out, “Allah help me”, when there came a boat from nearby and helped him. He was thankful for being saved. In reality the help was sent from Allah. Allah`s help and love is sent us through people whom help us and mould us in the people we become. So when we are not thankful for those whom have helped us, we can clearly see that we are not thanking Allah.

 

Is There Any Big Problem?

Imagine your own birth, and your mother giving you away to an orphanage, were you are brought up, without siblings and the security of parents and family. You are only given the basics of education to cope with life and are sent out in the world to save yourself. Now imagine the reality of your life. You were born, with parents, and grew up with siblings and secure home with good education, and your basic need were fulfilled by your family. You grew up to be the young man/woman and your parents found a match and married you to a spouse that became your world. Now you have a job, a spouse, children and friends with a succesful prosperous life ahead of you. Is there any big problem?

 

Right Priorities?

Most of us might say no, alhamdolillah we are blessed. But are you grateful? Are you thankful of Allah? Are you taking care of your parents, now that they need you like you needed them when you were borned. Time changes and I have seen more of people neglecting their parents need when they get their own families. Mostly sons. They forget the fact that wouldn`t it be for their parents sacrificing their life from the time they were born, they wouldn`t be where they are today? How can they now, when their parents are old, and in need of care, forget their efforts? In fact, when they aren`t thankful to their parents, they are being ungrateful to Allah as well. Hadrat Jibrael as said that those whom have old parents and doesn`t earn Paradise because of that, will not earn Allah`s mercy, and Prophet Muhammad pbuh said aameen to that dua. We are told to be good to parents and treat them well, and remember their favours on our life. Still there are so many married children, that get so occupied in their life, that they forget it, or neglect it. Sometimes I wonder how their children will be with them, when they come in the same age. We can see that times are changing. Not only in western countries but now also in some muslim countries we have seen homes for the elderly, where their children leave them their, and mostly doesn`t contact them again.

 

How Can We Return The Favour?

When I see old Norwegians going somewhere alone, without any children or grandchildren, my heart cries in sorrow for them. This is a universal value, to be good do parents, no matter religion or ethnicity. If we are not demonstrating good treatment toward or elderly than the next generation will learn that from us, and we will see the fruit of our work. May Allah wake us before it is too late. Parents are a gift, that no matter how much time you spend with them, once they are away, one always feel that the time we spent with them wasn`t enough. May Allah reward our parents with good in this world and the next and may Allah give them infinite deeds multiplied with infinity for every difficulty they have gone through because of us or anyone else, and may Allah help us to take care of them as much as they deserve, and help us repay all their favour upon us and make us a sadqa jariryah for them. Aameen summa aameen.

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 129 other followers

My Prayer..

“O Allah, place light in my heart, and on my tongue light, and in my ears light and in my sight light, and above me light, and below me light, and to my right light, and to my left light, and before me light and behind me light. Place in my soul light. Magnify for me light, and amplify for me light. Make for me light and make me a light. O Allah, grant me light, and place light in my nerves, and in my body light and in my blood light and in my hair light and in my skin light.” Ameen

Bukhari and Muslim

Calender

June 2017
M T W T F S S
« May    
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
2627282930  

Surah 105 Al Fil

Let not man be intoxicated with power, Or material resourses, They cannot defeat. The purpose of Allah. So Abrahah Ashram Found to his cost. His sacrilegious attack On the holy Fane of Allah brought about His own undoing:what seemed but frail Destroyed his mighty hosts in a day!

The foolproof tip of the day for everyone else!

USE YOUR OWN VOICE TO RAISE YOUR OPINION!

Nasiyat..

(",) My Mum always says that
you should marry someone
who loves you more than you
love him, because that man
would never ever make you cry
or be the reason that your
sheding tears. He would do
anything to always keep you
happy and satisfied (",)

:) W & R one 2 one :)

(",) Your heart is mine and mine is yours, and so it`s been since I`ve known love`s true meaning itself, holding each others hand we stand together beneath the lovely sky, gazing towards the same destiny, just U and I (",)

Naat/hamd-Quote of the moment :)

Saari duniya ke liye dard
se mahmor hain jo..
Ik faqat Rehmat-e-aalam
hi ka seena dekha..

Ye sab tumhara
karam hain Aka
ke baat ab tak
bani hoyi hain..

Ehsas dein toofik dein..
Phir jazbaen Siddiq dein..

Kya ye zarra likhein
Shaan Unki, jin pe
bejhein Salaam
khud Khudai..

Quote of the moment :)

Though we might sometimes
have to struggle through thick
or thin,We will receive each
other’s support to be there to
win..And we will blossom like
this through eternity..
InshaAllah
Ameen summa ameen

Når du er forent med en
du elsker, er det ingenting
du ikke klarer :)

Gode ord skaper tillit.
Gode tanker skaper
Inderlighet. God
giverglede skaper
kjærlighet:)

Mood :)

Overjoyous :) I wonder which song is always on my mind (",)

(“,) Always on my mind (“,)

Be mine all the time,
never cross the line,
I`m a one man woman,
I don`t share
what`s mine,
never settle for less..

Song of the moment :)

:) If you just love me, i will let you see, how more you need? :)

:) Discover enlightenment
holding your hand.. :)