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strong, brain, excersise, trening, hjernen  (1)Can you imagine that sometimes when you speak with your friends, you`re giving away your good deeds to those you don`t like. If that wasn`t enough you are also receiving their bad deeds in your account. The worst deal we can ever make is to backbite others, and that is what this comes from.

 

What To Socialize About?

Have you ever seen people whom likes to tell stories, without any friends? I certainly have not. People like to be with others whom is good at telling stories. Doesn`t matter if they are true or not, as long as they are funny and entertaining. Have you thought of if people would stop backbiting if we didn`t lend them our ears. If no one would want to listen to stories because they would know that more than 50% of it could be all made by assumptions, and give them a deaf ear, they`d immediately stop. People need something to talk about and socialize about. I like the quote : “Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, small minds discuss people” – Eleanor Roosevelt. If we think that we have great minds, why do we than degrade ourselves by discussing people? If we used more time discussing ideas, we`d might certainly find more solutions to our issues.

 

Our Perception Is Coloured By Our Values

What we talk about says something about who we are and is coloured by our perception of matters. Two friends are in a coffee shop drinking coffee while they see something strange happening. Because of their individual perception, they will speak and understand what they saw differently. They have invisible glasses on them that are made by their values. So even if they tell the story about this incident to two different people, chances are they won`t match. And if those two people they talked to are friends and somehow discuss what they told them, they will see how different they understood it, and how it is coloured with their point of view.

 

whoever gossips with you, will gossip about youPeople Like The Juicy / Funny Stories

Ancient historical happenings aren`t as interesting as the juicy and funny stories about their friends party the other day. Can you guarantee that a storyteller hasn`t told a lie? People like to listen to that which makes them feel good about themselves. What can possibly make them feel better than seeing someone they dislike, struggling in something. Prophet Muhammad pbuh has said that being happy when some people are afflicted with a calamity, can be difficult for them. Allah can save those afflicted with the calamity and make it a blessing for them and afflict those who laughed, with the same or something similar, that the other was saved from. So never be happy in others misfortunes. No muslim is allowed to make fun of or laugh of other fellow muslims or call them by offensive nicknames, Surah Hujraat. Seriously, today, do you know someone whom hasn`t laughed at another fellow muslim once, in a day. Yes we call ourselves muslims, but we are sometimes far from the manners it teaches. May Allah guide us.

 


Rasollallah Wants To See The Whole Ummah In Paradise

Another story which is connected to backbiting is something mostly girls/women do a lot; make allies. When couple of friends doesn`t like one person in the click, they can easily, fill their friends with hatred about them. She said, this and that about you, which could have been said but the intention for saying something and what it meant could have been 180 degrees opposite. Winning friends by fueling each other with hatred about each other, is not uncommon amongst girls/women. Jealousy kicks in once in a while and they don`t like that others succeed. Bringing others down won`t make you look better. Those who help other when they are down to achieve a similar success are the truly succesful people. Jannah is for all, right. If you don`t share your success stories with your surroundings in case they succeed more than you, your jealousy would eat up your good deeds. Imagine you tell something good to someone, and they perfect it more than you. One thought could lead to jealousy and the other to gratefulness. The gratefulness would come of the fact that every good deed that person does will be added to your account of deeds, just because you directed them to it. So all in all, being good can never be a loss. We should strive to become better than what we are today, recognizing our own potential. Our goal is not to be better than someone else at the mosque or any other event. Sallallaho wasallam wants to see all of his Ummah in Paradise. So if someone err, you can be a gentle reminder or at least, don`t be the reason others fail.

 

gossip1You Will Gain Only Good From It

A sunnah that can be revived is making excuses for your brother when you don`t know the whole story. If you hear something from someone regarding any matter, don`t think of it as the ultimate truth. One can draw a parallel to the mother of the believers, Ayesha raa. She was seen with another person and was left behind because of the necklace that she had lost on the way. When people saw here, they starting making all these tales about her. They only spoke about what they saw, but didn`t know the reasons behind. Allah proved her innocence in the Quran. Things aren`t always as they seem. Sometimes our own perception colours our glasses, but isn`t the entirely truth. That is why it is so important to have goodwill for our brothers and sisters in Islam. Whenever someone backbites anyone, make excuses, because we don`t know whether the backbiter is true or not or if he has made a tale out of assumptions. Think good of others. Give the backbiters a deaf ear. Next time they have something to tell, they won`t come to you. The thing is, it won`t be your loss. You will gain only good from it. Only when people will stop listening to backbiting, the vicious circle of blabbering mouths, would also stop. The punishment for the sin of the mouth is severe. A person can fall very deep into hell just because of some word he/she utters, or be given a higher status in Jannah because of something good he/she says. “The world will not be destroyed by those who do evil, but those who watch them without doing anything”.

when someone does something wrong, rightI know economy is not the first thing that is on your mind after marriage. But often it is quite important that this is sorted out, to avoid discussions between the husband and the wife after marriage. A lot of marriages break nowadays, and it`s got a lot to do with quarrels about money.

It`s quite common that both of the spouses share the expenses of the house. Even though the wife is not obliged to do so by Allah. In fact she can use her money wherever she wants and the husband has to pay the family`s bills and give her enough money for expenditure, which is normal in the society she lives in. Of course when only one of the husband work, he might have to have more than one job to manage. I have heard a lot of women whom gets bored by being home with the kids all the time, and after a few years want to earn their own money. Often they`re bored by doing the same chores and wants to earn enough for their lifestyle. Sometimes it could also be that she wants to help her husband with the bills, just so that she can ease some of his worries.

If one decides to marry back home and bring the spouse to the west, there could be some hurdles in the way. One of them is economy. Often if the spouse that came from back home, has a family there, they want to help them out with the expenses and start sending money to them. This can go both wrong and right. I have seen that when a desi family sees money coming, the demands often increase, and then the issues and quarrels about money starts. The spouse brought up in the west thinks that the desi spouse is sending too much money back home and therefore their own needs and the needs of their children are not met. A lot of quarrels and sometimes, divorce.

I don`t understand how a desi spouse would want to build up their family ties back home, and wreck their own family. Who should they be more committed to? Their children and their spouse or their family back home, that don`t have to work because they are receiving gifts from the desi spouse.

Sometimes it goes so wrong, that the desi spouse start sending money, without telling their spouse about it, so their money starts to decrease, without the other spouse knowing where they are spent. And from there on the quarreling about the money starts, and often it doesn`t end well.

Sometimes the desi spouse, is looking for allies to prove his/her innocence and therefore twist the real picture after their opinion and starts saying bad things about their spouse to other people. Often the childcare organisations gets involved and the children gets lost. The desi parent use their own children as shield and messes with their mind against their other parent. The children not having enough understanding of the situation gets confused as to how behave and what to do and not do.

So you see economy in a family should be sorted out before marriage, to avoid such circumstances.

May Allah help us help others. Ameen.

Check out and click on site www . Purify Your Gaze . com

https://purifyyourgaze.com/

My Prayer..

“O Allah, place light in my heart, and on my tongue light, and in my ears light and in my sight light, and above me light, and below me light, and to my right light, and to my left light, and before me light and behind me light. Place in my soul light. Magnify for me light, and amplify for me light. Make for me light and make me a light. O Allah, grant me light, and place light in my nerves, and in my body light and in my blood light and in my hair light and in my skin light.” Ameen

Bukhari and Muslim

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Surah 105 Al Fil

Let not man be intoxicated with power, Or material resourses, They cannot defeat. The purpose of Allah. So Abrahah Ashram Found to his cost. His sacrilegious attack On the holy Fane of Allah brought about His own undoing:what seemed but frail Destroyed his mighty hosts in a day!

The foolproof tip of the day for everyone else!

USE YOUR OWN VOICE TO RAISE YOUR OPINION!

Nasiyat..

(",) My Mum always says that
you should marry someone
who loves you more than you
love him, because that man
would never ever make you cry
or be the reason that your
sheding tears. He would do
anything to always keep you
happy and satisfied (",)

Poetry

(“,) Your heart is mine and mine is yours, and so it`s been since I`ve known love`s true meaning itself, holding each others hand we stand together beneath the lovely sky, gazing towards the same destiny, just U and I (“,)

Naat/hamd-Quote of the moment :)

Saari duniya ke liye dard
se mahmor hain jo..
Ik faqat Rehmat-e-aalam
hi ka seena dekha..

Ye sab tumhara
karam hain Aka
ke baat ab tak
bani hoyi hain..

Ehsas dein toofik dein..
Phir jazbaen Siddiq dein..

Kya ye zarra likhein
Shaan Unki, jin pe
bejhein Salaam
khud Khudai..

Quote of the moment :)

Though we might sometimes
have to struggle through thick
or thin,We will receive each
other’s support to be there to
win..And we will blossom like
this through eternity..
InshaAllah
Ameen summa ameen

Når du er forent med en
du elsker, er det ingenting
du ikke klarer :)

Gode ord skaper tillit.
Gode tanker skaper
Inderlighet. God
giverglede skaper
kjærlighet:)

Mood :)

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