You are currently browsing the tag archive for the ‘Cultivate’ tag.

prophet-muhammad-pbuh-i-love-mohammadOne matter we can improve is helping our children to get addicted to reading drud sharif as early as possible. There are many benefits of reading drud sharif, but the reason why I`ve heard it is good for families, is that it brings gentleness into our conduct. Many parents often complain that teens often become very rude and difficult. Reading drud often, everyday, can be something that tames their emotions and grant them control over themselves, so they become more easygoing, even within the family, not only with their friends.

Cultivate Gentleness In Your Child

Parents have a big job cultivating good qualities in their children. Often times as the child is growing, parents give their children different duties they have to do everyday, or some days in the week, to help them learn new task through responsibility. The parents make a chart for the whole week, and give a star for every accomplished work. One duty they can add to those chores is reading 100 drud sharif every day, in front of their parents, in the start, just so that the parents can hear them, help them recite it correctly, and make sure, they are actually reading it. As the child will get the hang of it, and the taste of it`s delights, parents can often say, if all four children read, drud every day 500 times, when each of the family member has read 10 000 drud or 100 000 drud, we will celebrate with an outing on a good halal restaurant, or a vacation somewhere they want to go, with islamic content, or some kind of reward / goal, you will easily motivate them.

The Atmosphere Will Change Positively

If your child start reading drud sharif regularly, You will see an immense difference in their attitude and behaviour. They will become more gentle in everything they do and say, and they will start liking sunnah deeds. Their love for Hazoor Paak pbuh will increase, and through that love, their obedience to Allah in private and public will improve. The drud sharif will beautify their inside and outside, with good sunnah conduct and noraniyat. What else can a muslim parent want for his / her child / teen? This will change the entire atmosphere of the house. Soon you will have less quarrels, more love and gracious practice towards each other. The love within the family, will increase. When the children slowly realize the good effect of reading drud sharif in their life, they will increase their practice of it, regardless of your motivation. When that happens you have done a great job, guiding your child to healthy habits. This will bring them bliss in this life and the hereafter. The drud sharif supports the reader of it, until the reader reads drud sharif so much, that Allah make it, the readers vasila, and take all his / her matters in His own Hands. Ya Allah grant this for every child, teen and adult of the ummah. Aameen.

positive parents, children, upbringingGood and bad health is in the hands of our Creator. There is also something we have in our hands to change the situation. Many people know the right of the parents and talk and praise those who treat them well. Though we need to talk more about how parents should treat their children also. Their childhood shape them for their adulthood. If we want them to be good contributors as adults, we nee to know how to mould them into what we want them to become. I have a few thoughts about this, I would like to share.

Children Above Their Age

Children need to learn the parents rights. The parents also should be aware of the children’s rights. If a childs` opinion is validated, and their parents make them feel like they can contribute to the conversation, even with their little intellect at the moment. They would be able to, see with amazement, that many times children say words that are above their age, and good for the conversation. It is the parents that build the childs` confidence in the beginning. Just like any spouse want un-divided attention, children also need a good dose of positive attention, love, care and nurture from their parents. If the parents are able to show this in a good way, they help build healthy people who are an asset for the community and the people they interact with.

parents recognize childrens abilites and efforts,Don`t Downplay Their Abilities

It is so easy to for a parent to say to a child, don`t be disrespectful. Though the parents must also realize that if you treat he/she with respect, and teach them how to behave in a good way, with encouragement, they will. If the only way to get any attention is when children does something wrong, of course, the child that need validation, would do anything for it. To bring out good qualities in our children, we must comment positively and take out time to listen to them and reason with them, to help them think good. Not only teaching them what to think, but how to think right. Don`t downplay their abilities. That is where they learn to downplay their own abilities, in their relations as adults. At the time a child is born, it is like a white sheet. Whatever it becomes and how it behaves depends on the values that are cultivated in him/her. The parents need to realize their responsibilities before it is too late. Encourage your children and see them blossom. Build confidence and self-esteem while keeping them humble and filled with humility and gratefulness. Knowing that good would not happen to them without the will and help of Allah and hard work. When they don`t win the game, appreciate their efforts, because they worked hard. We need to raise children that will be good for the community, muslims and non muslims, but most importantly, good for Islam. May Allah help all elders and children value and respect each other and fulfil their rights and obligations towards each other in a sunnah way and help them become resourceful for the community and to each other.

muslim couple, rights and obligations, quran, love, rose, flower, marriageOften when some husband take good care of their wife, and fulfil their obligations towards her and their children, his friends and family might comment that he has become a robot, where his wife decides everything. I want to highlight a few thoughts about this and why people might say such things.

We all are striving.

Some people are doing a great job when it comes to following sunnah. Not only when their friends and acquaintances are with them, but also at the time when no one is with them accept their loved ones and Allah. Some men are not shy off being good to their wife. Why should they be? Prophet Muhammad pbuh has said, the best of man is the one who is good to his wife, and I am the best to my wives. He pbuh lived what he said. He was not shy off helping around the house and giving un-divided attention to his other half. He gave them importance and supported them. If men want to follow his sunnah, being a good husband is also part of his sunnah. Not only praying on time and giving zakat.

Muslims can not be shy of practicing some part of their deen

No matter what others say. Hazoor pak saw has said he is afraid of a time when the disbeliever will be proud of their disbelief and a true believer will be shy of practicing his belief. I`m sure even those who comment negatively towards other, have their moments of being an awesome husband, though they are afraid of admitting it, because they see it as a quality we should not find in a man. How can they think that following the sunnah is not a quality they should have in themselves. I remember a time when Hazoor Pak pbuh was not to shy to admit in front of all the sahaba`s that the one he pbuh loved the most was Aisha raa. If he pbuh was not afraid of showing his love in front of everyone, than neither should any muslim husband.

Have we ever thought why other people comment negatively?

1.Jealousy/envy. Why are they so happy?
2.Not knowing what being a man is about.
3.Arrogance. That work is below my worth/standard.
4.Hobby: Putting hurdles in lives of succesful people.
5.Wrong understanding of Islam. Our rights and obligations.
6.Bad company.
7.Bad role-models.

We do not boast about following the Sunnah

Or become proud of the fact that we are Sunnis. To what extent we follow the Sunnah, shows the intensity of our love for our Prophet pbuh. So sometimes people might try to hide their good deeds from people to the extent that they would not like anyone to find out. In case they maybe returned because the intention is changing. The Prophet pbuh his family and sahaba, went to a lot of struggles for us. We must find ways to keep our intentions in check, but shying away is not the solution. The society has come to such matters, that we need good role-models that are not shying away from showing the right path, they have found. How can we say that we love him pbuh the most and be afraid to show the world that we want to live like him pbuh and are striving to cultivate his pbuh qualities in us. May Allah make us proud of our heritage in Islam, and help us practice it to as close to his pbuh life as possible. And not being shy of good conduct, even if we have people in our circle who are against it. May Allah guide us to good, till we accept nothing but good. May Allah mould us into what He wants us to become. Let us reach excellence in those qualities Allah and Hazoor pak saw like. And take out of our heart, soul and body, those qualities Allah and Hazoor pak saw dislikes. Aameen.

svane familieMany people often neglect children’s need to be seen and heard and valued for who they are, where their abilities are appreciated regardless of their siblings or friends achievements. A childs joy, when their parents listen attentively, and value all the siblings individually, when they are together as a family, is important. Often we wonder why some adults are so quiet and not into talking that much. When they grow up amongst many siblings, where some are very dominating, it is obvious that other doesn`t get that much chance to blossom or show their abilities. It could lead to they not cultivate their talents as much as their potential. People in general grow better in the right environment. Since everyone has different needs, we grow the best in different places. Seeing your child as the individual he/she is and value them for who they are, without comparison to other, is important.

 

Undiscovered Potential

Sitting at the dinner table with the family, and giving everyone chance to respond and talk to the family, is must, no matter how old they are, because their opinions need to be valued, to make them feel that they also have important opinions. Who hasn`t heard a toddler or a young child say something that is beyond his/her age. By excluding some children from the conversations, we can damage their self-esteem, and prevent them from believing in themselves. The saying “ghar ki murghi daal barabar”, is quite funny and accurate to prove the point. People outside of the family, sees so much potential in a child, while within the family, he/she can be neglected.

 

Values Are More Important Than Education

Our parents might have had this way of raising us. If we havent learned from their mistakes, we have not learned anything worthwhile. What can be more important than moulding our next generation into beautiful/giving people with good values who has the confidence to stand for what they believe in. I`m sure if we ask our friends all of them has something to point out about how they got raised by their parents. Good solid education won`t do any good for anyone, if the conduct, character, morals, manners, self-esteem etc are not cultivated and sound.

 

When You Are On Right, You Will Be Rewarded

Teaching children that nothing comes in this world without hard work. There is no elevator to success, everyone has to take the stairs, one step at a time, as long as you work hard and abide by the rules, you are a winner, no matter the outcome. Even if others doesn`t value your efforts know that Allah sees your struggles and will reward you, in this life and next. A good environment starts at home and as the child grows older other places like kindergarten, school, college, work and friends will have an impact on them. If we don`t cheer our children for their achievements, no matter how small, they will find someone who does. And that someone isn`t necessarily a good influence on them. For them to have a solid confidence to say no to bad things, they must have a good dose of self-esteem and confidence, that is taught from their early years. When children realize that Allah will reward, they will turn to Him, instead of other people for validation. Help them see the beauty in their conduct and character not their appearance. Having a rich character, makes one feel good. The only way to feel good is to know that you are doing something right, and having trust that you will be rewarded for it by Allah.

 

 

happy feetSee, Hear And Value Your Children

Treat them as individuals. Cheering them for having good conduct, character, and filling their bucket of esteem and confidence, and cultivating good values in them, will help them in all their struggles in life. Helping them believe in themselves will make it easier for them to cope with challenges. There is no bigger favour a parent can do for his/her child. Being fair so that no one is excluded and everyone gets a fair chance to speak, is important. It proclaims a message of equality. We need to be fair when some of the children are more dominating. When we teach children to listen to each other, they will of course do that. Growing up in an environment where we can`t express our views without fear of being ridiculed by other siblings, is damaging. The parents can make rules for a healthy conversation/discussion at home and make sure that they are also followed. Since the parents are the shepherds of the family, they need to make sure that their children are under good care and that their individual needs are filled and they are given space where they grow best. They will be questioned about their care, from Allah.

beauty2We have been taught in a young age through media and magazines that if we are not in a certain color size or shape, no one will like us. If we want to be anything we have to have good looks, regardless of our intelligence. I think it has rather become even worse nowadays, when children at a very young age are so obsessed about their looks and clothing. The media promotes that if you don`t have the right looks, you won`t succeed at all.

Good people are always beautiful
It is not the physical appearance of a person that tells us whether a person is good or not. It is the character. If you meet someone with good looks but cruel of nature, would you like that person? On the other hand, if you meet someone whom is of average looks, but is so easy to talk with and makes you feel comfortable, would you have liked that person? I guess, looks matters only for the first impression, but it doesn`t tell you the truth. Beautiful people aren`t always nice, but nice people regardless of their looks, are always beautiful. Their character shines through their good behaviour.

There is so much more to friendship
When we put a standard of whom we are going to interact with based on the looks of people, we can easily come into a circle of friends that may look great beside you, but are they good, trustable, supportive friends? We cannot make that judgement on those criteria. It is so much more to friendship than that.

Status higher than angels
Why do girls wear make-up? When they feel good about themselves, are happy or because they think they aren`t good enough, compared to others? When do we use perfume? When we are fresh or when we want to hide a foul smell? If we feel good about ourselves regardless of our looks, we will spread good thoughts into the community. If we always feel inadequate because the media or our surrounding tells us that we aren`t good according to their standards, that could break us down, and make us feel quite low. The only way to feel good about oneself, is to develop self-esteem that tells us that we are irreplaceable, one of a kind, a creation of Allah that can achieve a higher status than angels.

What makes you feel beautiful?
We usually feel good when we do good deeds, and bad when we do bad deeds. If we keep giving ourselves positive self-talk about the good that we do, we would increase our feeling of self-esteem. When people feel good about themselves, they don`t need validation from outside. So they don`t need to dress to impress, but they`ll rather dress in a modest way, because they will feel beautiful from the inside. It`s something else to look beautiful and something else to feel beautiful. When we are good and spread goodness, we feel good about ourselves. Not necessarily because we get a good feedback from our surroundings, but because we have realized that if we do what Allah wants us to do, He will be satisfied with us, and there is no better achievement than that. If we do something that angers Allah, His wrath may descend on us and that will make us feel bad and anxious.

love prophet muhammad pbuh

Our teachers are a inspiration
Everyone one of us has a talent in us. It is up to us, our teachers/leaders to cultivate it, and inspire us and motivate us to let it grow and utilize it for our own benefit and for the benefit of the society. We need to teach the children that beauty is not mere looks, but good character. If we help our children/youth increase their self-esteem and sence of self-worth, they won`t let the media control them, because they`ll know that they are one of a kind. When we know our worth we won`t degrade ourselves to let everyone see us, but rather hide our beauty for the one that truly deserves us. If we teach them the value of decent character, they will try to cultivate it. The best example is by our actions. If we lead with good conduct, also the children will feel inspired to the same path. The best feeling is achieved by sincerely doing good deeds and being helpful with what we have capacity to manage. May Allah help us understand what beauty actually is, and make our character a reflection of Prophet Muhammad pbuh`s way of living. Ameen summa ameen.

Check out and click on site www . Purify Your Gaze . com

https://purifyyourgaze.com/

My Prayer..

“O Allah, place light in my heart, and on my tongue light, and in my ears light and in my sight light, and above me light, and below me light, and to my right light, and to my left light, and before me light and behind me light. Place in my soul light. Magnify for me light, and amplify for me light. Make for me light and make me a light. O Allah, grant me light, and place light in my nerves, and in my body light and in my blood light and in my hair light and in my skin light.” Ameen

Bukhari and Muslim

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 134 other followers

Calender

December 2018
M T W T F S S
« Apr    
 12
3456789
10111213141516
17181920212223
24252627282930
31  

Surah 105 Al Fil

Let not man be intoxicated with power, Or material resourses, They cannot defeat. The purpose of Allah. So Abrahah Ashram Found to his cost. His sacrilegious attack On the holy Fane of Allah brought about His own undoing:what seemed but frail Destroyed his mighty hosts in a day!

The foolproof tip of the day for everyone else!

USE YOUR OWN VOICE TO RAISE YOUR OPINION!

Nasiyat..

(",) My Mum always says that
you should marry someone
who loves you more than you
love him, because that man
would never ever make you cry
or be the reason that your
sheding tears. He would do
anything to always keep you
happy and satisfied (",)

Poetry

(“,) Your heart is mine and mine is yours, and so it`s been since I`ve known love`s true meaning itself, holding each others hand we stand together beneath the lovely sky, gazing towards the same destiny, just U and I (“,)

Naat/hamd-Quote of the moment :)

Saari duniya ke liye dard
se mahmor hain jo..
Ik faqat Rehmat-e-aalam
hi ka seena dekha..

Ye sab tumhara
karam hain Aka
ke baat ab tak
bani hoyi hain..

Ehsas dein toofik dein..
Phir jazbaen Siddiq dein..

Kya ye zarra likhein
Shaan Unki, jin pe
bejhein Salaam
khud Khudai..

Quote of the moment :)

Though we might sometimes
have to struggle through thick
or thin,We will receive each
other’s support to be there to
win..And we will blossom like
this through eternity..
InshaAllah
Ameen summa ameen

Når du er forent med en
du elsker, er det ingenting
du ikke klarer :)

Gode ord skaper tillit.
Gode tanker skaper
Inderlighet. God
giverglede skaper
kjærlighet:)

Mood :)

Content.