You are currently browsing the tag archive for the ‘Responsibility’ tag.

marriage-quran-strong-bond-enemies-husband-wife-help-from-allahMany men talk about having more than one wife. According to Islam, it is allowed. The time of the sahaba, many widows needed support, and men were allowed to marry them. The orphans would get helped, and the women get supported. In that time the sahaba raa didn`t either see any bad in marrying any women whom had been married before. Also the muslim women, were more reliable.

Friendships With Opposite Gender Outside Marriage

Nowadays, men frighten their first wife, if you don`t stop the discussion, I would marry another. Alhamdolillah, it is allowed in Islam. It is only that the society of today, is much different from the time of the sahaba. The era of today is full of fitnah everywhere. Many are struggling with hijab and modesty. Integrity is seen less. People have become more materialistic. There is more lying than before. Good conduct and decent values are rarily found in people. In these trying times, most wives wonder about their husbands integrity. Most husbands wonder about their wife`s integrity. Husbands are wondering about one wife, what if you had four, demanding the same right? So one day you`re with one wife. Can you trust the second, third and fourth at that time? What reason do you have to be assured, that they are not with anyone else? Most women of today, can`t wait a day for her husband, when he is away. Also internet makes it easy to get friends, easily. When friends between the genders are ok, when do we know if both husband and wife have haya and practice modesty, when they are with other people? That is why it is important to choose spouse because of good character and decent values. Don`t choose spouse because of beauty, status or money. You are not choosing a car.  You are choosing the mother of your children. The qualities you see in her, will be seen in your children. The purity of the children is dependent on the purity of the husband and wife. If you want good children you can`t afford to choose wrong. Imagine your children imitating their mother. Dancing at bollywood songs and addicted to dialogues from indian dramas or movies. I would prefer to have a spouse where we both remember our Lord in everything we do, by practising obedience to Him in public and private. Following sunnah guidelines. Your married life isn`t dependent on your wife`s appearance. Your married life is dependent on you and your wife`s good qualities and abilities.  If your too obsessed about the beauty or luxury of this dunya, how will you be able to work for your souls home? The place you`re going to spend an eternity.  Ya Allah, protect us from bad faith. Aamen. Grant every ummati a righteous spouse. Aamen.

What If You Make The Same Mistake With Second Wife?

One can understand from this, that even if a man marries a second wife, there will be a half-year happy time, after that both will get used to each other. Than the same mistakes he made in the first marriage, will be seen in him towards his second wife? He didn`t fix them then. Of course, it wasn`t his faults. So the solution of disagreements between couple, is not to get another wife. It is to find ways of increasing love between the husband and wife in the first marriage. Finding ways of increasing compatibility. Understanding how your spouse feels loved and how your spouse accepts apologies. Showing love through gestures of respect, appreciation and gifts.

A Husband And Wife Of This Trying Time, Need To Prove Their Integrity To Each Other Every Day

One matter is settled. Men and women has a responsibility to cultivate in them good conduct, in private and public. Even if someone might win a blessing. He / she can easily lose it, if he / she doesn`t know how to value it. When it comes to Allah`s friends. Allah will never give His diamond, to a man who is not able to protect it and take care of it. That is something, that must be proven every day. Not just one day of a year. Ya Allah, grant every husband and wife to win the struggle of correcting their integrity, niyah, ikhlas and haya. Aamen. Protect every ummati from those who are un-reliable, untrustworthy, and those who have bad character. Aamen. A woman is tested when her man has nothing. A man is tested when he has everything. Let`s see who really passes the test? Ya Allah, grant every ummati help to make good decisions in life. Protect every marriage from envy, jealousy, magic and evil eye til the end of time. Aamen

Picture courtesy : The muslim show.

prophet-muhammad-pbuh-i-love-mohammadOne matter we can improve is helping our children to get addicted to reading drud sharif as early as possible. There are many benefits of reading drud sharif, but the reason why I`ve heard it is good for families, is that it brings gentleness into our conduct. Many parents often complain that teens often become very rude and difficult. Reading drud often, everyday, can be something that tames their emotions and grant them control over themselves, so they become more easygoing, even within the family, not only with their friends.

Cultivate Gentleness In Your Child

Parents have a big job cultivating good qualities in their children. Often times as the child is growing, parents give their children different duties they have to do everyday, or some days in the week, to help them learn new task through responsibility. The parents make a chart for the whole week, and give a star for every accomplished work. One duty they can add to those chores is reading 100 drud sharif every day, in front of their parents, in the start, just so that the parents can hear them, help them recite it correctly, and make sure, they are actually reading it. As the child will get the hang of it, and the taste of it`s delights, parents can often say, if all four children read, drud every day 500 times, when each of the family member has read 10 000 drud or 100 000 drud, we will celebrate with an outing on a good halal restaurant, or a vacation somewhere they want to go, with islamic content, or some kind of reward / goal, you will easily motivate them.

The Atmosphere Will Change Positively

If your child start reading drud sharif regularly, You will see an immense difference in their attitude and behaviour. They will become more gentle in everything they do and say, and they will start liking sunnah deeds. Their love for Hazoor Paak pbuh will increase, and through that love, their obedience to Allah in private and public will improve. The drud sharif will beautify their inside and outside, with good sunnah conduct and noraniyat. What else can a muslim parent want for his / her child / teen? This will change the entire atmosphere of the house. Soon you will have less quarrels, more love and gracious practice towards each other. The love within the family, will increase. When the children slowly realize the good effect of reading drud sharif in their life, they will increase their practice of it, regardless of your motivation. When that happens you have done a great job, guiding your child to healthy habits. This will bring them bliss in this life and the hereafter. The drud sharif supports the reader of it, until the reader reads drud sharif so much, that Allah make it, the readers vasila, and take all his / her matters in His own Hands. Ya Allah grant this for every child, teen and adult of the ummah. Aameen.

An attachment can be positive and it can be negative. Like a child is attached to his parents until he is independent. This is a natural attachment that we must go through. Like a nest. The baby birds learn to fly from their parents, and one day they leave their parents nest. 

The tricky part is when the attachment become negative to abusive. Like in the start of a friendship everyone seems good and nice. After a while you can see similarities of mental abusive and controlling behaviour. This often happens to people who are not able to understand how they need to respect themselves. So they tolerate disrespect from others. Other times, the “friends” doing the abuse tear down their selfesteem and confidence with their negative behaviour and remarks, that they are not able to protect themselves. 

The most important point is to learn your own value, and never let anyone devalue you. If they attempt to ridicule/ harass/ threatening/ demean or any other negative behaviour, you have to stop letting them into your life. Avoid them. 

Don’t let them manipulate you to think you can’t become succesful without them. Your success is not tied to one person. Our success comes from Allah. Bad influence is never welcome. At least not if you can’t protect yourself from the bad qualities of those people. 
This kinds of freindships are seen more in the internet world. It becomes a bad attachment when you miss them, when they’re not around. Like when a bad friend is with you, he / she treats you in a wrong way. The day he/she doesn’t come, you forget the negative treatment and miss the “company”. It’s not good for us to be around people that drag us down to bottom, everytime we meet them. Good people encourage others. Say good stuff. Gently and privately change the negative they see in you. They empover you. Anything else can not be tolerated. 

We must get rid of the bad influence in our life by making boundaries, people do not cross. If they try, first attempt: warning, second attempt: out. When we let other walkover our boundaries, they can become more cruel. 

The shephards has to protect who is under their responsebility, if they are not able to protect themselves. And every shephards will be questioned about their responsebility. If they do good, it is a way to earn immense reward. Responsability is mostly given to those who can fulfil it. If unnessasary mistakes are common. Their deeds can make their afterlife miserable. That is the greatest misery of all time. May Allah protect us. Help us diligently fulfil our duties towards those we are responsible for. And grant us wisdom to protect ourself and our loved ones from bad influence forever. Ya Allah, make us of those who have the courage of stopping the hands of the oppressors, when and if they harm us or our loved ones. Aameen ya rab. 


It is very important that teachers whom master some kind of talent, should be sure, that those they teach it too, have right values and will not misuse it by going to the “dark side” and “selling/teaching” it to bad people who can further on, misuse it. 

It’s like teaching children martial arts. It is very important that the teacher install good values in their students, so they won’t misuse what they have learned and beat other kids. 

Even if the teachers takes this into consideration, there can be students who pretend to be good to learn something. 

When some kind of power comes in the hands of wrong people, we know they will make difficult situations for those they dislike. 

It’s like training up a soldier to become a master in everything soldiers should know. If his teachers in the army, doesn’t make sure this person is capable of mastering this or perhaps might have any hurt inside that can drive him/her to misuse it, they probably won’t enroll him/her. 

People with good ethics does not go around training up people who will become a “killing machine”. 

It’s like training up ordinary people in a land of war with new tehniques to fight in a war, without considerating that they can be “bought” by their enemy, or driven to the enemies, in order to hurt those (countries) whom taught it to them. Not a good tactic if you want less enemies.

rose, quality muslimah, islam, conduct, knowledge, wisdom, practice Islam, understandI have met so many amazing muslimahs the last 9 years. Women who has so much to offer, yet their resourcefulness is not being utilized. Their lives would have been so much more meaningful, if their family had backed them more. Let me explain more.

The Help They Need

A wife`s first priority after marriage is her husband, and after some time their children. In most asian muslim families, where daughters are brought from back home to the west. It take many years to help them adapt to the society here. Some learn the language easily, while others might never ever be able to pass test to be able to work. Although it is the family`s responsibility that these women are helped through there first years here, many times they do not get the help they need.

First Of All Imagine.

You have a network of family and friends back home. When you come here, you not only have to adapt into a whole new family but also build your own new network. That is not always that easy. Especially for wives, when they often get busy with parenthood, before they are able to learn the language properly. They have to postpone their own dreams in order for the family. I might dare say, many women come back to school, years afterwards, where they tell how much they also wanted to utilize their life for something more meaningful than just stay home with children and the little network they have or might not have. They have dreams to also earn a living, using their resources to earn money and buy things without always thinking of their expenditures. A little more planning and help from the husband could have made their situation easier.

Being A Mother Is Very Giving

Every woman has dreams of her own. Apart from being a mother and a wife. Doing something meaningful that is important to here. Having a social life, friends, network, buying things she need, without always have to ask for permission, or to be able to have women only evenings with her friends. Husband doesn`t realize that if they would support their wife more in achieving her dreams and some sort of independence, she would become a much better wife for him and a better mother for her children. Often times when women get married, they give little precedence to their own needs. Their husband needs come first. Than their children’s needs. Then their in-laws preferences. After a list, at the end their own needs come, if they have any energy or time to spend for themselves. For a mother to give her children to her husband and have a friends dinner out, is if i might dare say, not the reality for many asian wives. Although the husband in the same family, has at least one day a week, he can enjoy with this friends. If not many more. Even though the parenthood is both parents responsebility, often the mothers take the most heaviest burdens. They have a such job, that they never get any time off. It`s a 24/7 on work for their family.

Education Going To Waste

When husbands stop their wifes from getting a job or an education or to work when they have a sound education. They should re-think what they are doing. If and when the parents of a muslimah doctor had thought the same. The wife of these husbands had to meet a male doctor at the hospital for a check up under her pregnancy. Thank god, that some parents encourage their daughters to get a decent education with good values so that they can contribute to the community. We have muslimah doctors, nurses, teachers, dentists, engineers and so on. It is not easy for them to go out of their home and work. Their best hijab is in their home. But yet we must not forget that if every muslimah had thought that, our own muslimah wives, would have had difficulty getting any good help, without meeting their own “tribe”, when they need some sort of help/assistance. We can`t stop these resources from contributing positively for the society, and be so selfish and only think about our own good. Of course that comes first, but we must also try to help others, whom might have more difficult life than ourselves.

Muslimah`s And Islam – The Sunnah Way

Under the time when the prophet Muhammad pbuh had to do hijrah to medina with Abu bakr Siddiq raa, they left makkah and passed by cave thawr. They stayed there for a few days to protect themselves from their enemies. The daughter of Abu Bakr siddiq raa, Asma Bint Abu Bakr, came to them with food-supplies, through difficult roads and facing many dangers. The muslimah sahabi`s have helped Islam not by being passively at home, but by being with the muslims in wars, also fighting the enemies and taking care of those wounded. So you see it is not Islam that oppresses women, it is the illiterate minds. Even knowledgable people can be illiterate for not being able to believe in what is right and haqq. If knowledge opened minds of everyone than the most knowledgable lecturers would have accepted Islam. Not everyone does. Even in the most intelligent people there are many who doesn`t accept what is right for what is right and what is truth for what is truth. I believe that if you as a mailman have managed to find your way to Allah and believe in him and try to enjoin good and forbid evil, you are more intelligent than the lecturer with a phd, that thinks that Islam is not haqq or right. I have learned to calculate people, from how faithful and obedient they are to Islam. Islam doesn`t oppress women. Mostly the wrong culture does. May Allah give all wives help to realize their dream in their life. And make all the muslimah`s resourceful for each other and helping each other prosper. And guide husband to be more supportive of their wife. The sunnah way. Aameen summa aameen.

outward, inward, tazkiya, soul, dhikr, tawbah, ghusl, wudhu, sheikh mohammed yaqoubiIt is not un-common in the days we are living in that people are affected negatively by their community. I have noticed this from when I was younger, though the materialistic values have increased. Often children are more obsessed about what they own so they can brag to their friends, and be of those whom are admired. Is the fact that someone has something a reason to admire that person? It depends, if we are talking a pure heart, good conduct, righteous friends, good company, good values, than I won`t disagree at all. Unfortunately what people rather admire is the fancy house, new cars, new fancy clothing, numbers of followers or friends etc. When in fact these things doesn`t say anything about the person’s real treasure.

It Is Not illegal To Be Rich

People are competing in a race where there is no goal. The development of technology in the world is increasing so rapidly that even if you have a Ipad 5 today, in a few months 7 or 8 will be out in the shops. We can`t keep up with this race without losing what is really important; our values. What is important is not how big your house or car is, but rather your values as a person and how close you are to Allah. It`s not illegal to be rich, but with it comes a lot of responsibility. In fact, the people whom have the most money will be the people whom will be questioned about where they used it. Alhamdolillah, tabarakAllah, my point is not that we sell everything we own, to live a simple life. It is mear to point out that just because you are rich, doesn`t mean that you can`t have the right values. In other words, focus on what is important, your values, your character and conduct. Your life and your hereafter.

Compete In Cultivating Right Values

Instead of competing in number of kids and size of house and number of cars, compete in cultivate the right values in your children and family, so that no matter how much you are blessed you will always remember the sacrifices our previous predessors made for us to be where we are now.  Not only that, but your family will appreciate the blessings more when they realize that it could have been given to others. When in fact they know the suffering of children around the globe. They would most probably like some children, join other friends and collect money for them, with what they can do. By selling lemonade and mum-made cakes, early in their life they will realize what is important. Everyone has a right to have a good life and food and water and home and security. Though because the worlds treasures are not equally divided between people, some have more than others. It doesn`t necessarily mean that they deserve what they get. They are being tested by Allah for what they are doing with what they have. At the same time it will keep our feet on the ground, when we realize that all of this is not given for our joy. The test of ease and the test of difficulty. Some people are tested by given a gift, others are tested by witholding a gift from them. Allah knows how much patience people without the basics in life, has to go through, of troubles that might be the reason why they will go to Paradise, years before the rich muslims. Abu Bakr Siddiq raa gave away everything he owned before he died. He didn`t even leave anything for his children, just to be amongst those people that will be entitled to go to Paradise first. SubhanAllah what a determination.

The Inside The Same As The Outside

In the time of Islam and the years after, people were more worried about the qualities in them that were not seen on the outside, their clothing and what they own. Nowadays people are more worried about if their clothing is matching their shoes or hijab, or for men if they have the right amount of beard, with the right new trendy clothing. Gotta look smart. If we put just as much effort in cleaning our souls, and our hearts, as we do in keeping ourself looking awesome, than maybe our inner and outer self would be the same. If we won`t do that than it might happen that our outer self looks better than our inner self. For people with the right values, their goal is that their inner self is better than the outer self or at least just as good. To keep their sincerity and intention correct they do as much they can in secrecy, to avoid show-off in their deeds. Whereas most of us are those who share the smallest achievement in regards of ibaadah, when in fact a simple evil-eye-affect can reverse it for us.

It Is A Worldwide Muslim Issue

I see people being consumed in things that aren`t good for their hereafter, and I feel so helpless because I don`t know what to do or how to help them. I`m no expert and not even close to what experts in this field could help us with. All I know is that mosques need to talk about so many topics in their gatherings with sisters and brothers and youth that needs to be dealt with asap. Or else we are in hands of our own destruction. This is a worldwide problem everywhere were there are muslims. May Allah preserve us and help us and guide us and give us a heart that accepts guidance. Aameen summae aameen.

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 129 other followers

My Prayer..

“O Allah, place light in my heart, and on my tongue light, and in my ears light and in my sight light, and above me light, and below me light, and to my right light, and to my left light, and before me light and behind me light. Place in my soul light. Magnify for me light, and amplify for me light. Make for me light and make me a light. O Allah, grant me light, and place light in my nerves, and in my body light and in my blood light and in my hair light and in my skin light.” Ameen

Bukhari and Muslim

Calender

June 2017
M T W T F S S
« May    
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
2627282930  

Surah 105 Al Fil

Let not man be intoxicated with power, Or material resourses, They cannot defeat. The purpose of Allah. So Abrahah Ashram Found to his cost. His sacrilegious attack On the holy Fane of Allah brought about His own undoing:what seemed but frail Destroyed his mighty hosts in a day!

The foolproof tip of the day for everyone else!

USE YOUR OWN VOICE TO RAISE YOUR OPINION!

Nasiyat..

(",) My Mum always says that
you should marry someone
who loves you more than you
love him, because that man
would never ever make you cry
or be the reason that your
sheding tears. He would do
anything to always keep you
happy and satisfied (",)

:) W & R one 2 one :)

(",) Your heart is mine and mine is yours, and so it`s been since I`ve known love`s true meaning itself, holding each others hand we stand together beneath the lovely sky, gazing towards the same destiny, just U and I (",)

Naat/hamd-Quote of the moment :)

Saari duniya ke liye dard
se mahmor hain jo..
Ik faqat Rehmat-e-aalam
hi ka seena dekha..

Ye sab tumhara
karam hain Aka
ke baat ab tak
bani hoyi hain..

Ehsas dein toofik dein..
Phir jazbaen Siddiq dein..

Kya ye zarra likhein
Shaan Unki, jin pe
bejhein Salaam
khud Khudai..

Quote of the moment :)

Though we might sometimes
have to struggle through thick
or thin,We will receive each
other’s support to be there to
win..And we will blossom like
this through eternity..
InshaAllah
Ameen summa ameen

Når du er forent med en
du elsker, er det ingenting
du ikke klarer :)

Gode ord skaper tillit.
Gode tanker skaper
Inderlighet. God
giverglede skaper
kjærlighet:)

Mood :)

Overjoyous :) I wonder which song is always on my mind (",)

(“,) Always on my mind (“,)

Be mine all the time,
never cross the line,
I`m a one man woman,
I don`t share
what`s mine,
never settle for less..

Song of the moment :)

:) If you just love me, i will let you see, how more you need? :)

:) Discover enlightenment
holding your hand.. :)