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Hazoor Paak ‎ﷺ manners are perfect. He has perfected how and what good manners are. We cherish him ‎ﷺ because of his ‎ﷺ way of interaction with each and every. His ‎ﷺ seerah is our guideline in how we can reach his ‎ﷺ awsome character, truthfulness, sincerity, genuine care, cheerfulness, problemsolver, comforter, supplications, obedience to Allah, Purity, Asr, strength, inclusiveness, dislikes of sins, heartmelting speech and conduc, good treatment of others regardless of what they own, gratitude to Allah, concern and mercifulness for all humanity. 

The Upper Class With Good Manners 

People nowadays, often find excuses of why people are difficult, because of their lack of manners. Just teach him/her manners. That is more important than knowledge. I dont agree with this. First of all, knowledge is useless without behaviour in accordance with what we have learned. It’s not enough to “know” that the best of men are those who are good to their wife. It must also be seen in their conduct. Second point is that many people know, how to eat, sit, what to say, not say, the prohibitions of guarding tongue and private parts. The upper class knows how to behave, but they lack the good islamic values in their life. They know what to wear, how to decorate their home, how to befriend anyone. Still they lack the basic teachings of Islam. The problem isn’t that they do not say salam to people, the problem is that when that person has passed, most people are not able to guard their tongue from sins of the tongue, eyes or private parts. This has become so ordinary, that people doesn’t see any problem with it. 

He ‎ﷺ seeked advice from his ‎ﷺ wife

It’s not enough to say that you love Hazoor Paak ‎ﷺ because of how he helped everyone, and supported everyone all the time, when you are too ashamed to help your wife in front of your friends, because your friends makes fun of the sunnah of helping your wife. His wife decides everything. Hazoor Paak ‎ﷺ has wives who have helped him with what he should do, when the sahaba raa were not obeying his command. His ‎ﷺ wife said, don’t tell them to cut their hair and make sacrifice. Do it and they will follow your conduct. And what she raa said, happened. 

95 % Of Muslims Are Not Doing It

How can we talk about manners without talking about Hazoor Paak ‎ﷺ seerah. His ‎ﷺ most perfect treatment of others. How are we today? Do we lower our gaze? Do we read 5 salah everyday? Do we speak truthfully? Do we slander? Do we make fun of others? Are we practising humility? If only 5 % of muslims pray salah, and the salah, protect us from doing sins, it means 95% of muslims are surely sinning, not only by not praying, but because they aren’t praying, they are not able to stop themselves from those sins prayers protect them from committing. 

A New Time Of Ignorance? 

I know that the problem of the ummah, is that there has come a new time of jahiliyah (ignorance). There is no event we can attend where there isn’t people who are sinning with their tongues, with their eyes and with their private parts? The protection a practising muslim sees, is by simply decline. I don’t want to be a part of any event, where my islamic values are disrespected. 

Can You Hear Hazoor Paak ‎ﷺ weeping? 

I’m sure Hazoor Paak ‎ﷺ knows what we are going through. Can you imagine his ‎ﷺ feelings? He ‎ﷺ weeping. He ‎ﷺ weeping. He ‎ﷺ sobbing. What will happen to my ummah, when the ummati are just as afraid from another ummati, as they are from a non-muslim? 

marriage-quran-strong-bond-enemies-husband-wife-help-from-allahMany men talk about having more than one wife. According to Islam, it is allowed. The time of the sahaba, many widows needed support, and men were allowed to marry them. The orphans would get helped, and the women get supported. In that time the sahaba raa didn`t either see any bad in marrying any women whom had been married before. Also the muslim women, were more reliable.

Friendships With Opposite Gender Outside Marriage

Nowadays, men frighten their first wife, if you don`t stop the discussion, I would marry another. Alhamdolillah, it is allowed in Islam. It is only that the society of today, is much different from the time of the sahaba. The era of today is full of fitnah everywhere. Many are struggling with hijab and modesty. Integrity is seen less. People have become more materialistic. There is more lying than before. Good conduct and decent values are rarily found in people. In these trying times, most wives wonder about their husbands integrity. Most husbands wonder about their wife`s integrity. Husbands are wondering about one wife, what if you had four, demanding the same right? So one day you`re with one wife. Can you trust the second, third and fourth at that time? What reason do you have to be assured, that they are not with anyone else? Most women of today, can`t wait a day for her husband, when he is away. Also internet makes it easy to get friends, easily. When friends between the genders are ok, when do we know if both husband and wife have haya and practice modesty, when they are with other people? That is why it is important to choose spouse because of good character and decent values. Don`t choose spouse because of beauty, status or money. You are not choosing a car.  You are choosing the mother of your children. The qualities you see in her, will be seen in your children. The purity of the children is dependent on the purity of the husband and wife. If you want good children you can`t afford to choose wrong. Imagine your children imitating their mother. Dancing at bollywood songs and addicted to dialogues from indian dramas or movies. I would prefer to have a spouse where we both remember our Lord in everything we do, by practising obedience to Him in public and private. Following sunnah guidelines. Your married life isn`t dependent on your wife`s appearance. Your married life is dependent on you and your wife`s good qualities and abilities.  If your too obsessed about the beauty or luxury of this dunya, how will you be able to work for your souls home? The place you`re going to spend an eternity.  Ya Allah, protect us from bad faith. Aamen. Grant every ummati a righteous spouse. Aamen.

What If You Make The Same Mistake With Second Wife?

One can understand from this, that even if a man marries a second wife, there will be a half-year happy time, after that both will get used to each other. Than the same mistakes he made in the first marriage, will be seen in him towards his second wife? He didn`t fix them then. Of course, it wasn`t his faults. So the solution of disagreements between couple, is not to get another wife. It is to find ways of increasing love between the husband and wife in the first marriage. Finding ways of increasing compatibility. Understanding how your spouse feels loved and how your spouse accepts apologies. Showing love through gestures of respect, appreciation and gifts.

A Husband And Wife Of This Trying Time, Need To Prove Their Integrity To Each Other Every Day

One matter is settled. Men and women has a responsibility to cultivate in them good conduct, in private and public. Even if someone might win a blessing. He / she can easily lose it, if he / she doesn`t know how to value it. When it comes to Allah`s friends. Allah will never give His diamond, to a man who is not able to protect it and take care of it. That is something, that must be proven every day. Not just one day of a year. Ya Allah, grant every husband and wife to win the struggle of correcting their integrity, niyah, ikhlas and haya. Aamen. Protect every ummati from those who are un-reliable, untrustworthy, and those who have bad character. Aamen. A woman is tested when her man has nothing. A man is tested when he has everything. Let`s see who really passes the test? Ya Allah, grant every ummati help to make good decisions in life. Protect every marriage from envy, jealousy, magic and evil eye til the end of time. Aamen

Picture courtesy : The muslim show.

If your husband has female “friends”, you will have problems in your marriage. 

If your wife has male “friends” you will have problems in your life.

There is no need to socialize more than necessary with the opposite gender. It will lead to fitnah. No one is immune to fitnah, no matter how many masters or bachelors they have in their cv. That is one of the main reasons why mixing between genders is prohibited in Islam. 

If it can’t be avoided because of work, at least minimize it to the bear minimum, and be as proffesional as possible. Nothing breaks the heart of a spouse more than realizing that his / her spouse  is engaging with others in non-islamic ways. 

I can’t understand why there is any need to have friends from the other gender. These friendships ruin lives. Infatuation. Many wrongs happen when fitnah is not stopped. 

May Allah protect all marriages. And keep us pure, from having friendships with the opposite gender. And protect us from jeopardize our marriage for anything else. Aameen. 

keep calm and give a big bear hug, hugs, children,Hugging therapy is definitely a powerful way of healing. Research shows that hugging (and also laughter) is extremely effective at healing sickness, disease, loneliness, depression, anxiety and stress.

Research shows a proper deep hug, where the hearts are pressing together, can benefit you in these ways:

1. The nurturing touch of a hug builds trust and a sense of safety. This helps with open and honest communication.

2. Hugs can instantly boost oxytocin levels, which heal feelings of loneliness, isolation, and anger.

3. Holding a hug for an extended time lifts one’s serotonin levels, elevating mood and creating happiness.

4. Hugs strengthen the immune system. The gentle pressure on the sternum and the emotional charge this creates activates the Solar Plexus Chakra. This stimulates the thymus gland, which regulates and balances the body’s production of white blood cells, which keep you healthy and disease free.

5. Hugging boosts self-esteem. From the time we’re born our family’s touch shows us that we’re loved and special. The associations of self-worth and tactile sensations from our early years are still imbedded in our nervous system as adults. The cuddles we received from our Mom and Dad while growing up remain imprinted at a cellular level, and hugs remind us at a somatic level of that. Hugs, therefore, connect us to our ability to self-love.

6. Hugging relaxes muscles. Hugs release tension in the body. Hugs can take away pain; they soothe aches by increasing circulation into the soft tissues.

7. Hugs balance out the nervous system. The galvanic skin response of someone receiving and giving a hug shows a change in skin conductance. The effect in moisture and electricity in the skin suggests a more balanced state in the nervous system – parasympathetic.

8. Hugs teach us how to give and receive. There is equal value in receiving and being receptive to warmth, as to giving and sharing. Hugs educate us how love flows both ways.

9. Hugs are so much like meditation and laughter. They teach us to let go and be present in the moment. They encourage us to flow with the energy of life. Hugs get you out of your circular thinking patterns and connect you with your heart and your feelings and your breath.

– taken from mind body green fb-page –

every child is gifted, a success story, build people, family, parentingPeople doesn`t always understand when we talk about different emotions and how different approaches can have an impact on others. Unless we help them understand it with money. 😛 Yes we want someone to do something or not do something, simply add or delete the cash. If we think about ourselves as having a bank of emotions in our soul/heart. A positive word, will put a deposit in the account. A negative word or action might take a withdrawal from it. If we keep the positive deposit more than the negative we will be feeling good. If the negative account is more than the positive we will be feeling sad or some negative emotion.

 

People Can Be Good And People Can Be Bad

We all have something good and bad in us.  If we always pinpoint why our children aren`t cleaning their room or anything negative they are doing, every time we talk, they will be filled with negative energy. They might not want to spend time with us. If we instead, fill them with positive feedback that is precise and  positive, not being vague in speech, we will soon, fill them with so much positive energy that, if and when we sometimes give them some negative feedback, it won`t be the end of the world for them. Because a lot of positive deposit doesn`t mind if a withdrawal comes once in a while. If we already have a negative account, and withdrawal would be devastating.

 

every kid childDon`t Use Fear 

People have different incentives to help their loved ones achieve new heights. Some motivate others with love, others with fear. And what would work depends on the situation and the person. Expressing love has the power that will give a positive deposit in the loved ones bank-balance. If we genuinely care for others, we will rather inspire others in this way. A person whom gives and gives will certainly be given back. If we on the contrary would try to make people change because of fear. That might work for the moment. Some day that fear can be given back in a negative way by a withdrawal from your account. It can`t lead to good, if you always use fear as a method for people to behave a certain way. I pray that our family`s are of those who build us and not those who tear us down. That will make us easily manage the ups and downs in life. If the family always has a “told-you-so” waiting whenever we fail in something, it teaches us to not have confidence and trust our own judgement. Later when we, have to make our own decisions these qualities makes a big difference in our life. We need to nurture self-confidence, self-esteem, trusting own judgement, independence, self-respect, self-worth. We are more with our family`s than anyone else. They have a real great opportunity to help us grow as muslim and humans. Only selfish reasons would make us want to prevent each other from achieving success. Always hesitate to make a withdrawal without knowing if there is enough balance to withdraw from.

 

When Given A Good Portion Of Love

Each and every would be able to move mountains and become the person they are meant to be. We work best when we our stomachs/souls are full. When we help others feel good, we become better people. We feel good also because of being giving. Don`t be miserly in choosing a positive approach, and see how it changes every situation to something beautiful, and be ready because it will come back to you. Making others feel good about themselves is an art and on-going- charity that will have positive side-effects. Help each other to practice it. Jazak Allah kheyr.

smiley starYou know when your children come home from school, and you see that their arguments and their behaviour has changed. The first thing you should find out is if they have been with some new or old friends lately. Most people are easily affected by people and their thoughts. Some people let others opinion have precedence no matter how many good points they have to contribute.

 

The Sun Is White Today

It is great to have friends and have someone to spend time with, share ideas, have fun, and be yourself. Though it is very important that we understand that friends arguments are colored by their opinions and values. You should make your own opinion about matters rather than letting other people (your friends) decide what you should think. It is like some friends can say; today the sun is white. You won’t believe it because you know that the sun is always yellow. But when you see that all of your friends are saying that the sun is white today, eventually you’ll stand beside them, and say the same. Pressure.

 

Research, Research, Research

Listen to others opinions, but make your own thoughts about the matter, after you’ve heard all sides. In that way you won’t let your opinions be based on a few distorted opinions that are far from the truth. Rather your opinion will be based on what is right and correct after you`ve researced all sides of the matter, and concluded with your opinion. Since all of us are not born einstein, we sometimes have to ask other people to help us, when there is something that is out of our own understanding. Make sure that you ask people who are reliable and knowledgable and they wouldn`t distort the truth for some benefit, but would rather be bold enough to say it as it is. Not to gain support but to open people`s mind to what is happening.

 

Conclusion

No matter how many people your socialize with don`t lose your own voice, even when you are in a crowd. Hear all sides of the story but at the end make your own opinion. Talk with experts in the field rather than listening to people`s random opinions about the subject.

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My Prayer..

“O Allah, place light in my heart, and on my tongue light, and in my ears light and in my sight light, and above me light, and below me light, and to my right light, and to my left light, and before me light and behind me light. Place in my soul light. Magnify for me light, and amplify for me light. Make for me light and make me a light. O Allah, grant me light, and place light in my nerves, and in my body light and in my blood light and in my hair light and in my skin light.” Ameen

Bukhari and Muslim

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Surah 105 Al Fil

Let not man be intoxicated with power, Or material resourses, They cannot defeat. The purpose of Allah. So Abrahah Ashram Found to his cost. His sacrilegious attack On the holy Fane of Allah brought about His own undoing:what seemed but frail Destroyed his mighty hosts in a day!

The foolproof tip of the day for everyone else!

USE YOUR OWN VOICE TO RAISE YOUR OPINION!

Nasiyat..

(",) My Mum always says that
you should marry someone
who loves you more than you
love him, because that man
would never ever make you cry
or be the reason that your
sheding tears. He would do
anything to always keep you
happy and satisfied (",)

Poetry

(“,) Your heart is mine and mine is yours, and so it`s been since I`ve known love`s true meaning itself, holding each others hand we stand together beneath the lovely sky, gazing towards the same destiny, just U and I (“,)

Naat/hamd-Quote of the moment :)

Saari duniya ke liye dard
se mahmor hain jo..
Ik faqat Rehmat-e-aalam
hi ka seena dekha..

Ye sab tumhara
karam hain Aka
ke baat ab tak
bani hoyi hain..

Ehsas dein toofik dein..
Phir jazbaen Siddiq dein..

Kya ye zarra likhein
Shaan Unki, jin pe
bejhein Salaam
khud Khudai..

Quote of the moment :)

Though we might sometimes
have to struggle through thick
or thin,We will receive each
other’s support to be there to
win..And we will blossom like
this through eternity..
InshaAllah
Ameen summa ameen

Når du er forent med en
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du ikke klarer :)

Gode ord skaper tillit.
Gode tanker skaper
Inderlighet. God
giverglede skaper
kjærlighet:)

Mood :)

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