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We know that many muslim families in the west, help their children start wearing hijab from primary school. Many non-muslim disagree about this practice. Even politicians have spoken against it, and want the authorities to ban hijab from school. Hijab is fardh, obligatory, from puberty, in Islam. The years before puberty it is optional for the child if she prefers to wear it. Often parents want the child to start with hijab early, because parents want their child to use hijab from their early teens. If they get used to the idea, it will become an easy choice for them to choose it also for their early adulthood. The problem arises because non-muslims think that children are forced to wear hijab. So they are thinking about banning it so no child is forced to wear it. The parents here are helping children wear covering clothing that increases the dignity and honour of girls. That can prevent them from becoming easy victims of sexual abusers.

Teens Who Hide Their Age

How do they dress in the west? Children are influenced to wear clothing like adults. The media, commercials, socializing with friends, celebrities sites. A whole industry of buying what is “popular” right now. The pressure is immense. Many children wear revealing clothing that adults wear, that while their real age is 10, they look like they are adults. In other words, 15-20 years ago, it was easy to see the real age of children from what clothing they wear and their behaviour. Now that is impossible. The influence of youtube and media, how a child behaves and what she chooses to wear, often robs them from their childhood. The children’s mind and thoughts mature faster than their age. When children, girls, behave and think and wear clothing that is above their age, they will easily attract the opposite gender who are more mature and elder than them. When they go places no-one knows their real age, they can easily fake being 18 etc. We know the issue about under aged children, fake ID and trying to get in contact with elder people, just to experience the thrill of having done something brave, and a good story when they meet their ordinary friends. We have heard real incidents in Norway and in uk about underaged girls having sexual relations with men in their twenties. There is a possibility that these girls have hid their real age. We can`t be assured that it is only the mens fault. It is of great trouble for the community when children look like adults, because of what they wear and how they behave. It is very important for a child to have friends that are on their own age and not above their age. When they first grow up, they can`t be a child again. But if they grow up too early, and we could prevent it, we robbed their childhood from them. That is really sad. If we are to decide that a muslim child can`t cover themselves completely, I think it is also about time we decide that non-muslims are not allowed to wear certain revealing clothing at the primary school. If we Morally evaluate the effect of half-naked children at school, compared to all-covered children at school, the effect of lesser clothing, is worse than the effect of those who choose to cover themselves completely.

How A Rapist Choose His Victim

When we read about those who have raped, some people have done a study of these people. As to why they rape, and who they choose. In these studies, they have come to the conclusion that if the rapist saw two women coming to the area he wants to attack, and one of them are dressed half-naked and the other is wearing covering clothing, he will choose the woman with less clothing. In other words, the rapist won`t choose a woman who is covered. Even though we agree that raping is not allowed. And those who rape are not allowed to rape, even if the whole town doesn`t wear clothing. Even if it is not the victims fault that she is being raped. To protect her from being raped, every caring mother would tried to convince her daughter to not wear these clothing outside the house, where she is in danger of being a victim of abuse. Where she can come across other rapists. We have to help our children make good choices so we can save them from these dangerous people. No-one sends their children to dangers. We love our children more than we love ourselves.

How Can Our Sons Focus Easier And Learn More At School

When there comes to understanding relationships and why and how men or women behave, we all agree that they are different. Different in how they understand love, how they understand respect, different in what qualities are important for them in their relationship. Men are turned on differently then women. Men are visual. The more of beauty that can be seen of a woman the more the man will have difficulties to not look. In the book “What you need to know about inner life of men” by Shaunti Feldhahn, she explains how men think and why. This is how Allah made men. This is the test of men. If women are more aware of their clothing when they step outside their home, and hide their beauty with hijab, many men would have easier days outside their homes. If men lose focus of what they are doing when they see a beautiful woman, I`m positive so does a boy lose focus of what they are doing when they see a beautiful girl at school. As a mother of boys, how well do you think your sons focus is in school, if a girl, a class-mate of his is wearing half-naked clothing every day of summer?

I Worry More About My Daughters

Often people worry about mothers of daughters, because they think that they have a more difficult job raising their children than those mothers of sons. I don`t think the one is easier or more difficult than the other. Both jobs, raising a son or a daughter is challenging. It is important to teach both genders to behave modestly and good. Sons must be taught to respect women regardless of how they behave. Women must be taught to respect themselves and behave with dignity and honour and protect their beauty. If we allow children to go around half-naked at school and ban those people who choose to cover themselves completely, we are shooting ourselves, by making it more troublesome for the children to focus in their learning, and may not be able to protect them from illicit relations / problems were the moral standards are low. If the authorities could balance their decision, it would be more helpful. Do not allow children to wear half-naked clothing of sexual art at school. Those children who choose to cover themselves should be allowed. If we think from what the child says, that she is being forced to wear a hijab, than take action. If we find out that children are wearing hijab with free will, it should be allowed. There should be some sort of balance. Non-muslims do not understand the detrimentalness of socializing between boys and girls who have no sence of modesty, dignity and honour. The police in Norway often update their social media platform, with info about crimes in Norway. Lately they have said that there is an increase of sexual offences. Many experts in the field assume there are much higher number of sexual assaults than what is reported to them. This often comes from filth in the media, nudity, weird programs on internet and tv, internet and socializing with the wrong people and alcohol and drugs. No boundaries is equal to chaos. If we look at the behaviour of places in Norway there is more muslim youth and places where there are less muslim youth, experts say in places with many muslims, the youth smoke less and drink less alcohol. And places where there are less muslim youth, the youth drink more alcohol. It is said that if the parents drink alcohol, it is likely that their children will adopt the drinking habits of their parents. If we look at the education of muslims and foreigners, they are on top when it comes to taking higher education. Especially the girls. The boys are behind. Maybe the reason why boys are behind when it comes to higher studies is the fitnah, tribulations they experience. So we see that the muslim community has also increased the communities with goodness. It is not all negative. But negative information gets more coverage in media. They blow up information. People who don`t know or check the real facts, start believing the mis-information of many journalists. Ya Allah, please help us to protect every ummati from negative influence and grant every ummati all good righteous company everyday, all day. Help us to protect our communities for our families and for the families that will live here in the future. Aamen

israel, usa, world, president, war crimes cartoon gaza under attack israel carlos-latuffI get so amazed by some people when they say that they love a country/ethnicity etc. I know love is blinding, but most people do take this quite literally. For instance when your son is misbehaving in any way. You would, out of love as a parent, try to help him behave the right way. No parent would say, “Oh, I love my son so much, that I`ll let him do whatever he does, because I don`t want him to get hurt/sad”. That doesn`t make any sense. A parent when they see his son trying to catch “fire”, would stop him, so he wouldn`t get burned. Lets replace the little kid/son/brother with the name of Israel, and lets replace the name of parent/big brother with U.S. Now Israel is killing innocent civilians in Palestine, taking over their country. Some real mean stuff. The whole world knows their atrocities. Still father/big brother U.S. is backing him up. “Do whatever you want son. I`ll prevent you from falling or being jailed”, U.S. says. The whole world can see that and admit that most of what the Israelis are doing are wrong. Despite this, I know people whom praise Israel, like they can`t see their war-crimes.

Imagine Your Son Is Misbehaving At School

He is bugging some other kids. You wouldn`t, if you were a good decent parent, cheer him for doing this. I`m sure parents with good values, would stop their child from hurting others. Imagine, if you actually praised him for bullying some class-mates. What do you think would happen to your son? His confidence would increase, and he might do more and meaner stuff. Why? Because your backing him up. If you keep backing up your son, when he does something wrong, it will motivate him to keep on doing it and probably increase him in his wrongdoing. If you don`t want your child to eventually be criticized by the principal or get expelled, most parents, would try to use some incentives to help him stop from misbehaving at school. So you see when son Israel know that father/big brother U.S. has got his back no matter how much wrong he does to bullied Palestine, he won`t stop.

israel vs palestineThis Makes Me Angered And Sad

When other people whom supposedly love Israel, praise the state, despite the wrong decisions it has made, and how many war crimes it is involved in. How can you close your eyes to the fact that even if Israel can be doing 1% right, he is still doing 99% wrong. By cheering him up, just because you generally love Israel, because of it`s holy-ness, is wrong. Yes the land is holy, and muslims also believe that Judaism came before christianity and then Islam came after that. But we can`t stand here and say to someone who just because your message at that time was gods message, I agree with what you are doing now. That doesn`t make any sense. Besides. If you saw jews as your friends, you would tell him when his wrong. Even if that hurt him. You wouldn`t cheer on your friends when they make mistakes, big mistakes, like killing people. If you have the right values, you would make him go to the police and take the sentence the court judges. Because your friend killed another person. It`s not allowed. Just because your friend was born on holy land doesn`t make himself holy. Our Prophet pbuh said too his daughter Fatima raa, your lineage would not make you go to Paradise, so work on doing good deeds. That is the only way of going to Paradise. He said that to his own daughter. Ma sha Allah, that is Islam. Everyone has to pay for their own bad deeds, and will be rewarded individually for their good deeds. If they want to prosper, they will work on this. There is no shortcuts to success, each and every has to take the stairs, one step at a time. If you`re a friend of jews and Israel, a “real” friend, you would stop him from doing wrong. It`s that simple. And if the jews and the state Israel, doesn`t stop it`s war-crimes. It will have a bad end. Maybe in this world, but most certainly in the hereafter, when their crimes will be judged before Allah. They most certainly will have to pay for it. It`s not only about saving your butt in this world. The most important point is whether you are saving your or others butt in the next world, hereafter, when it really will matter. Because the outcome will decide your faith for eternity. May Allah open our eyes, before we become guilty in the same crime, because we didn`t put any effort in stopping it. Aameen.

love increase with age, old couple, with quoteOften in life we come to a road that leads to two different places. We don`t know which one to choose. The decision is tough and we are not always familiar with all the pros and cons. That is when we seek advice from people whom has more wisdom and knowledge than us. Someone whom has travelled such a distance, can know about the dangers and the traps of the journey. Likewise when a child becomes an adult and is mature enough to take the responsibility of marriage. They will most often ask their parents for help in choosing a spouse. They have, after all, more experience and wisdom than their children. If the parents are going to find a spouse, it is crucial that they know their daughter`s /son `s wishes and goals. After all they are the one’s life it is about, not their parents wants and preferences.

 

Level Of Imaan

When the family are informed about a potential spouse, they spend time to find out more about that person through a third-party, the advisors.  An important aspect of seeking advice is to know the advisors personally, whether they have the same values as yourself. The advice you receive will depend on the advisors being a practising muslim or a non-practicing muslim. Whatever suits your child. The important point here is to find someone who’s level of imaan is compatible to your childs.

 

An Eligible Advisor

Parents, when you ask someone for advice about a potential spouse for your child, remember to ask someone whom is known to be just/fair. A just person would only say the truth. A friend would only praise the person. An enemy would only tell negative things. A just person will tell the positive and negative he/she knows, without adding extra spice/sugar to the information. There is no person without some negative qualities. The main thing is that the two individuals add up to each others qualities.

 

Their Answers Depend On Their Benefit

Your criteria for liking/disliking someone can be different from others. People often look for their own benefit in the matter before they give any advice. These kinds of people are mostly not truthful because they base their answers on their on benefit of the situation and it could change.

 

Be Just

Advisors beware: today someone is asking you about another muslims daughter. You will be asked from Allah about how you answer. Be just. Today it is someone else`s family, tomorrow it could be someone in your own family. People whom misguide others on purpose, will have a tremendous sanction for it from Allah. May Allah protect the Ummah from seeking advice from people whom aren`t eligible for giving it and help us not accept advice from people whom are not truthful. Aameen.

siblings, brother, sister, sur, little brotherHaving children is a great blessing for parents. To pass on the legacy of Islam to another generation that will live Islam. Often both parents prefer sons over daughters. Mainly because they think that they will be the most supportive because they become providers too. They have forgotten that Prophet Muhammad pbuh`s legacy was passed on by his daughter Fatima raa.

 

Pray For Piousness

Parents shouldn`t focus on the gender of the child, but rather praying for it to be a good muslim/muslimah. Praying for pious children even before marriage shows that you are responsible and worried about their Hereafter. Instead of competing in numbers or a specific gender, rather be motivated to increase the quality of upbringing. We don`t always know whether a son will be more valuable than a daughter. Allah is going to send tribulations through our sustenance. We will meet both difficulties and ease. Thinking that those who have daughters are less blessed is wrong. Most parents realize later in life that daughters are a greater blessing. Mostly because of their softheartedness and emotional intelligence they take better care of their family/parents, compared to their sons.

 

Practice Equality In Giving

Often people with children from both genders, prefer the son more than the daughter. Prophet Muhammad pbuh was once sitting with some sahaba when one sahabi`s daughter came and she seated herself beside him. A while after his son came, he kissed him and let him sit on the lap. When the Prophet pbuh saw this he said that we can`t treat our children differently, but they should be treated equally. If you give a gift to one, the gift has to be given the other siblings. If not they will be questioned about that on the Day of Judgement. When Fatima raa visited Prophet Muhammad pbuh, he pbuh would kiss her hand and let her have his pbuh seat. She would return the gesture to him pbuh, when he pbuh visited her. He pbuh was also helpful in the house. Even if times have changes some men doesn`t help as much as they should. Learning about the sunnah might motivate men to do more.

 

When Allah withholds A Gift

It is Allah whom chooses sons for some and daughter for others. We can`t complain to Him and question His Wisdom behind the decision. Whatever Allah gives us, be grateful in good times and show patience in difficult times. There will be both. The happiest people are those who are content with the little they are blessed with. Being happy with the decree of Allah shows our dependency and trust in Him. He is the one in Control. We can draw a comparison through the lesson where a child is in his mother’s lap and wants to touch the fire. The mother knows that if he touches the fire, he will burn himself. The child doesn`t know that. The mother because of the love for her child, will keep him away from the fire. It is the same with every blessing. Sometimes Allah withholds something from us because He think something can hurt us through it. Other time He withholds to give us a bigger gift or to purify us and raise our status before we are given a gift.

 

Every Child Is Precious

Be fair to your children and express your love to them often.  Make them feel loved, so they are not misled by people. Fill their bucket of confidence. Don`t hesitate to motivate them when they are down, or gently correct them when they need to be advised. Teach them good values to make them a contribute for the Ummah and their community. Through your efforts in their early years they can be a sadqah jariyah for you. Most of all treat them equally. Sibling rivalry can easily be controlled if the parents are fair between them and each child gets quality time alone with parents, so they don`t feel neglected. The other siblings won`t get jealous of the love they are giving. Gently advising them privately is the best way of getting any changes in their behaviour that can be improved for the future.

 

Thank you allah, heartWithout appreciating what people have done for us, and being thankful, we are not appreciating what Allah has done for us. Because when people help us, it is directly sent from Allah. He sends people as blessings and inspire them to help us, in some way. For example there was a person that was drowning in an ocean. He cried out, “Allah help me”, when there came a boat from nearby and helped him. He was thankful for being saved. In reality the help was sent from Allah. Allah`s help and love is sent us through people whom help us and mould us in the people we become. So when we are not thankful for those whom have helped us, we can clearly see that we are not thanking Allah.

 

Is There Any Big Problem?

Imagine your own birth, and your mother giving you away to an orphanage, were you are brought up, without siblings and the security of parents and family. You are only given the basics of education to cope with life and are sent out in the world to save yourself. Now imagine the reality of your life. You were born, with parents, and grew up with siblings and secure home with good education, and your basic need were fulfilled by your family. You grew up to be the young man/woman and your parents found a match and married you to a spouse that became your world. Now you have a job, a spouse, children and friends with a succesful prosperous life ahead of you. Is there any big problem?

 

Right Priorities?

Most of us might say no, alhamdolillah we are blessed. But are you grateful? Are you thankful of Allah? Are you taking care of your parents, now that they need you like you needed them when you were borned. Time changes and I have seen more of people neglecting their parents need when they get their own families. Mostly sons. They forget the fact that wouldn`t it be for their parents sacrificing their life from the time they were born, they wouldn`t be where they are today? How can they now, when their parents are old, and in need of care, forget their efforts? In fact, when they aren`t thankful to their parents, they are being ungrateful to Allah as well. Hadrat Jibrael as said that those whom have old parents and doesn`t earn Paradise because of that, will not earn Allah`s mercy, and Prophet Muhammad pbuh said aameen to that dua. We are told to be good to parents and treat them well, and remember their favours on our life. Still there are so many married children, that get so occupied in their life, that they forget it, or neglect it. Sometimes I wonder how their children will be with them, when they come in the same age. We can see that times are changing. Not only in western countries but now also in some muslim countries we have seen homes for the elderly, where their children leave them their, and mostly doesn`t contact them again.

 

How Can We Return The Favour?

When I see old Norwegians going somewhere alone, without any children or grandchildren, my heart cries in sorrow for them. This is a universal value, to be good do parents, no matter religion or ethnicity. If we are not demonstrating good treatment toward or elderly than the next generation will learn that from us, and we will see the fruit of our work. May Allah wake us before it is too late. Parents are a gift, that no matter how much time you spend with them, once they are away, one always feel that the time we spent with them wasn`t enough. May Allah reward our parents with good in this world and the next and may Allah give them infinite deeds multiplied with infinity for every difficulty they have gone through because of us or anyone else, and may Allah help us to take care of them as much as they deserve, and help us repay all their favour upon us and make us a sadqa jariryah for them. Aameen summa aameen.

sunnah is helping around in the house, men, husband, fatherRamadan is a month to let our soul connect with Allah through ibaadah. It is important that all the family members get a chance to improve themselves, not only the men. Often the women in the house, daughter, sister, mother, wife does not get the chance to spend as much time for ibaadah because of the chores of the house. It is important that the whole family helps around, so that it doesn`t burden a few. Ramadan is not about the iftars and food we are going to eat at the end of the day, it is about getting closer to Allah and how can we possibly achieve that if we are over-burdened.

It is important that men help around the house more in ramadan. The same if you have children, keep them also busy helping. Good family ties kan only be kept from team work, we are in this together, one goal, and we help each other to do good. If ramadan is meant for us to forget the women in the house and overburdening them with our request for iftar meals, we are not living the essence of ramadan.

help me draw closer to you this ramadan.You are not the only one whom prayers are obligatory for. Your family must also pray. Make it easy for each other to pray. Give the women in your family breaks at salah time to complete the salah with khusoo and no concern for the food that is cooking. Men will be held accountable for every salah their daughters, sister, mother and wife missed or read being overburdened. Work chores can easily become family time, if we try to keep a good environment for each other. Maybe that is something that won`t make the chores that unwanted, especially by the children or teens. If these teens boys and girls are given good values from the start they will grow up and become an asset to the whole community, not only for themselves. Parents can teach them good qualities. It is vital that we give them time as the fragile age they are in. A good muslim is first and foremost good to his family. Ramadan is a time to grow spiritually. Make this a time for the whole family to help become better people and better muslims.

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My Prayer..

“O Allah, place light in my heart, and on my tongue light, and in my ears light and in my sight light, and above me light, and below me light, and to my right light, and to my left light, and before me light and behind me light. Place in my soul light. Magnify for me light, and amplify for me light. Make for me light and make me a light. O Allah, grant me light, and place light in my nerves, and in my body light and in my blood light and in my hair light and in my skin light.” Ameen

Bukhari and Muslim

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Surah 105 Al Fil

Let not man be intoxicated with power, Or material resourses, They cannot defeat. The purpose of Allah. So Abrahah Ashram Found to his cost. His sacrilegious attack On the holy Fane of Allah brought about His own undoing:what seemed but frail Destroyed his mighty hosts in a day!

The foolproof tip of the day for everyone else!

USE YOUR OWN VOICE TO RAISE YOUR OPINION!

Nasiyat..

(",) My Mum always says that
you should marry someone
who loves you more than you
love him, because that man
would never ever make you cry
or be the reason that your
sheding tears. He would do
anything to always keep you
happy and satisfied (",)

Poetry

(“,) Your heart is mine and mine is yours, and so it`s been since I`ve known love`s true meaning itself, holding each others hand we stand together beneath the lovely sky, gazing towards the same destiny, just U and I (“,)

Naat/hamd-Quote of the moment :)

Saari duniya ke liye dard
se mahmor hain jo..
Ik faqat Rehmat-e-aalam
hi ka seena dekha..

Ye sab tumhara
karam hain Aka
ke baat ab tak
bani hoyi hain..

Ehsas dein toofik dein..
Phir jazbaen Siddiq dein..

Kya ye zarra likhein
Shaan Unki, jin pe
bejhein Salaam
khud Khudai..

Quote of the moment :)

Though we might sometimes
have to struggle through thick
or thin,We will receive each
other’s support to be there to
win..And we will blossom like
this through eternity..
InshaAllah
Ameen summa ameen

Når du er forent med en
du elsker, er det ingenting
du ikke klarer :)

Gode ord skaper tillit.
Gode tanker skaper
Inderlighet. God
giverglede skaper
kjærlighet:)

Mood :)

Content.