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fitnaHave you heard about, a young sahabi, whom saw a naked woman doing ghusl, and been so guilty of it, and cried for a long time, until he died of it. Not only ashamed of the action, but by the fear of Allah, how Allah will punish him. This was a young sahabi named Tha‘labah ibn ‘Abd ar-Rahmaan of the time of Prophet Muhammad pbuh.

Don`t Walk Near The Pit-falls

We know that times are changing. This time is filled with fitnah. It is very easy for a child, teen or adult to easily get access to any kind of filth, without their parents, or spouse, knowing. Hazoor Paak pbuh has said, in the time when the sahabi lived, Allah expected more from muslims when it comes to good deeds and quality. Because they were many, it was easier to do good deeds, with good quality. Hazoor Paak pbuh, said the time will come when holding to your deen is like holding to a coal of fire. Allah will expect less of the muslim, because it is very difficult for muslims to do deeds with good quality in times of fitnah. So no, we can`t excpect us muslim to be as good as the muslims of the sahabi era, but Allah doesn`t tell us to give up. We must struggle. Allah rewards us according to our struggle, niyah and ikhlas. So we must try to find ways that can help each other to remove pitfalls, so we can protect our own home and every muslim from the ummah, who is listening.

Your Charges Are Dropped, If You Marry Who You Raped

There is a country with many muslims. In that country, when a man rapes another woman, if he agrees to marry her, he will not get punished by the court. I don`t understand how it is possible that a country can make such rules. I do understand that this can`t be ok for the girl/woman who is raped. First of all, no girl / woman can be ok with marrying someone who doesn`t respect her. Someone who doesn`t respect a “no”. By letting these men of the hook, may put out the fire, but it won`t prevent more men to do the same. Easy way out. We rape her, we marry her for some time and divorce her when we want to. This is not ok. Instead of this rule, that country, should try to change the mindset of the younger teens and men, how to respect a girl/women. You might have other from the same gender in your family? A sister, a mother, a wife, a daughter. We must teach the male gender that they have to work on their self-control. Be in control of themselves in tough times. No matter what a girl, women does or says, nothing can justify a rape, in any way. But the girl and women, need to be responsible with how they behave. We have to be careful how we behave, in front of other men. We can revive the sunnah of modesty in our life.

coal-hand-islamNon-muslims Are Attracted To Modesty In Muslims

Another side of the story, if a muslim girl/woman wears perfume, and goes outside where other non-mahram might be. This is not allowed, because men will experience fitnah. So some people asked a scholar, what if a man puts on perfume? A woman experience fitnah. Then what? Some scholars say the reason this is not applied to men, women don`t stalk men. But men can easily stalk a woman. Time is changing. Here in the west, the husbands, sons, brothers of our family, is a muslim minority. When they step out of their homes, most people they meet at school, college, work are men and women who are non-muslims. Non-muslim women has less barriers to interact with the opposite gender. At the same time single people are increasing in our country. Muslim mens modesty and faith, is very attractive. I`m talking about non-muslim women who are almost always being lusted by others, wherever they are. Many of them who get tired of this, wants to be loved for who they are not what they look like. It is not only a muslims identity to practice modesty, but can be seen in general in asian cultures, no matter what religion. Many non-muslim women easily fall in love with muslim men, because they see in them qualities they hardly find in their own people. So the fear of being stalked by a non-muslim women is not to fare fetched. A non-muslim woman can create more difficulties for muslim men who are in the struggle of correcting their hijab. The struggle becomes more dangerous. You can read any book about the struggle men have when a beautiful women is nearby. They struggle to perfect the hijab, is much more difficult. A readable book: what you need to know about the inner life of men, by shaunti Feldhahn.

Muslim Girls Who Travel Alone

Non-muslim girls and women aren`t the only who make the struggle harder for men. Because of the weak iman in many muslim girls and women, they can easily become a stalker themselves. Nowadays, it`s not seen as difficult, for a group of muslim girls/ women to go for a vacation without any mahram. Many travel only with their female friends to many countries. If a muslim girl can take the airplane to scotland, to visit a friend, or relax for a weekend trip, it can most certainly, not be difficult for her to find out about another male muslim, where he lives, matters about his life, and try to make him like her, and want to marry her. In other words, men who aren`t working on their hijab, and use perfume, and look good, will experience fitnah from non-muslim girls/women AND muslim girls/women. So yeah their struggle is real. I can`t say I want muslim men to not go outside, they are the provider. They have to. But they must be aware of these matters. Ya Allah, grant all muslim men of the ummah to win the struggle to perfect their hijab, in public and private. Protect them from experiencing fitnah and bad company. Aameen

Fear Of Tribulations For Both Genders

An aspect that is less talked about because of the tabu issue, is the fact that a girl/ woman raping a boy/ man. Just because it is less addressed doesn`t mean it doesn`t happen. Mostly men are seen as the strong, so it is very difficult for them to admit that a girl/ woman tried or succeeded in raping them. Since we already have realized the big tribulations are on rise, there are girls/women who are guilty of this. This is a very sensitive topic. But it needs to be addressed. The numbers are unknown. This is a very important reason, why muslim girls / women must be helped to correct their hijab by their family, friends or the muslim women leaders of the community. When a girl/ woman says she has been raped, everyone immediately, accepts that as the truth, because she is the weak part, most of the times. When boys / men have been raped, it`s more difficult for them to complain to the police, because of shame of being man and weak. If and when they feel that, they need to read the surah Yusuf, chapter of Quran. Both gender can experience someone trying to seduce them. We must help each other and all the community to find solutions, and help to protect every marriage in the community. Ya Allah, make it easy for all the ummah to win the constant struggle of perfecting our hijab, in public and private. Ya Allah grant every ummati to master their self-control in public and private. Ya Allah, grant the ummah to win the struggle of protecting ourself and each other from bad company. Ya Allah, help all the ummati to win the struggle of being in good company all the time. Don`t let bad qualities have any effect on any ummati. Inspire the muslim women/men leaders, to address their followers about this, in a way that will have good effect on those listening. Aameen

love between spouse, sunnahIt is good to see that the community has seen the value of educating people before they get married to make sure that they are familiar to their responsibilities and their rights. Alhamdolillah. That is a great start. I feel that we need dig a bit deeper into the issue of marriage. To get a better result we must start earlier. First of all. Most of parents are not aware of the rights their children have to choose their own spouse, and mostly the relatives put many roadblocks in their way, if they don`t want two people to join in marriage. To give back the two individuals right to marriage, we must also educate their parents and their relatives, meaning the elders. Mostly whom has a twisted interpretations of Islam, and therefore also the practice.

The Struggle Is Real

If the mosque could have dars for parents that have children who are in their teens, it would help them understand, what kind of struggle teens have. We need to help parents understand that it is not easy for them to live here in the west and still stay pure. Parents can use the life of Sahaba to educate the teens on how they lived their life and what is expected from them according to Islam. Practice what they preach. Sadly most parents spend their time on matters that are pretty un-islamic. Teens learn love from the media, bollywood, hollywood and dramas, and think that they portray the right kind of love. WHen in fact they are not even near it. If the teens are taught about love through the lives of Prophet pbuh and Sahaba raa they will be educated in what could give them a more fulfilling and lasting marriage.

Asking For Trouble

If we want to get to the root of the problem, that is the parents and the community. If they have right values and live and act according to Islam, they will teach the same values to their children, through their life. Not just what they say or what image they have in their community. In most families the relatives wants to have a say when two families are thinking of marriage for their children. The chacha of fla fla is against it. Or the khallla of fla fla feels the same. Parents are also pressurized from the community and don`t know what to do. When in fact it is not the whole community that decides this. The people who want to get married doesn`t have a right to choose their spouse freely. When they meet so many roadblocks on the way. The elders are asking for trouble. Not only are they making it difficult for the ones that want to get married, to live a pure life, they are also increasing fitna by not accepting the good spouse that asking for their child in marriage. And most of all, I don`t understand how the alims or the mosque can close their eyes to this. Do they not know? Or maybe they agree to it. The culture is given precedence over religion. And that will make it more difficult for muslims to be true and sincere muslims.

Who Is To Blame?

It is to easy to put the blame on the spouses when a marriage fails. It is the fault of the community and their parents. What values they taught them from they were children and if they helped them follow Islam from them leading by example. It is the communities fault that they have not educated the parents. It is the parents fault that they have not taught the spouses their rights and obligations. When culture is more important than religion, we will have more trouble. We must get back to Islam not only by speech. That is where we will find blessings and everlasting happiness.

siblings, brother, sister, sur, little brotherHaving children is a great blessing for parents. To pass on the legacy of Islam to another generation that will live Islam. Often both parents prefer sons over daughters. Mainly because they think that they will be the most supportive because they become providers too. They have forgotten that Prophet Muhammad pbuh`s legacy was passed on by his daughter Fatima raa.

 

Pray For Piousness

Parents shouldn`t focus on the gender of the child, but rather praying for it to be a good muslim/muslimah. Praying for pious children even before marriage shows that you are responsible and worried about their Hereafter. Instead of competing in numbers or a specific gender, rather be motivated to increase the quality of upbringing. We don`t always know whether a son will be more valuable than a daughter. Allah is going to send tribulations through our sustenance. We will meet both difficulties and ease. Thinking that those who have daughters are less blessed is wrong. Most parents realize later in life that daughters are a greater blessing. Mostly because of their softheartedness and emotional intelligence they take better care of their family/parents, compared to their sons.

 

Practice Equality In Giving

Often people with children from both genders, prefer the son more than the daughter. Prophet Muhammad pbuh was once sitting with some sahaba when one sahabi`s daughter came and she seated herself beside him. A while after his son came, he kissed him and let him sit on the lap. When the Prophet pbuh saw this he said that we can`t treat our children differently, but they should be treated equally. If you give a gift to one, the gift has to be given the other siblings. If not they will be questioned about that on the Day of Judgement. When Fatima raa visited Prophet Muhammad pbuh, he pbuh would kiss her hand and let her have his pbuh seat. She would return the gesture to him pbuh, when he pbuh visited her. He pbuh was also helpful in the house. Even if times have changes some men doesn`t help as much as they should. Learning about the sunnah might motivate men to do more.

 

When Allah withholds A Gift

It is Allah whom chooses sons for some and daughter for others. We can`t complain to Him and question His Wisdom behind the decision. Whatever Allah gives us, be grateful in good times and show patience in difficult times. There will be both. The happiest people are those who are content with the little they are blessed with. Being happy with the decree of Allah shows our dependency and trust in Him. He is the one in Control. We can draw a comparison through the lesson where a child is in his mother’s lap and wants to touch the fire. The mother knows that if he touches the fire, he will burn himself. The child doesn`t know that. The mother because of the love for her child, will keep him away from the fire. It is the same with every blessing. Sometimes Allah withholds something from us because He think something can hurt us through it. Other time He withholds to give us a bigger gift or to purify us and raise our status before we are given a gift.

 

Every Child Is Precious

Be fair to your children and express your love to them often.  Make them feel loved, so they are not misled by people. Fill their bucket of confidence. Don`t hesitate to motivate them when they are down, or gently correct them when they need to be advised. Teach them good values to make them a contribute for the Ummah and their community. Through your efforts in their early years they can be a sadqah jariyah for you. Most of all treat them equally. Sibling rivalry can easily be controlled if the parents are fair between them and each child gets quality time alone with parents, so they don`t feel neglected. The other siblings won`t get jealous of the love they are giving. Gently advising them privately is the best way of getting any changes in their behaviour that can be improved for the future.

 

Be to Allah as he wishes to.On our way to living the life we want each and every one of us has one day or the other been tried through different circumstances in their life. This life is a test and we are tested all the time if we make the right choice or not.

Remember that Allah test those He love, more than others. If you feel it`s been a bit too much lately, remember you are in His eyes 🙂 From these tests Allah wants to cleanse us from our bad deeds. He wants to make us clean from every impurity and raise us.

It`s very difficult to think like this at the moment one is tested, though if we ask Allah to help us in every possible way in our life, He will in sha Allah guide us as well at that time also.

Think about all the tests you have gone through throughout your life? Haven`t you learned a valuable lesson through them all? One way or the other, we learn something from every tests. They were sent in our life for a reason. To make us stronger? To guide us to something? To prevent us from getting on the wrong road?

When one starts to think through why something happens the way it does, one starts to realize that it is Allah that is guiding us through all the hurdles and the troubles. He wants us to be safe but first He wants to cleanse us. And when we will have thrown away all the impurities Allah will hand us our gift as a result of that, in sha Allah.

Allah is here for us. He always listens. It if our responsibility to take out time to talk to Him, to make supplication to Him. If we are on this road, sooner or later, we will also see the light. Put your trust in Him and He will take care of rest, in sha Allah. Ameen summa ameen

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My Prayer..

“O Allah, place light in my heart, and on my tongue light, and in my ears light and in my sight light, and above me light, and below me light, and to my right light, and to my left light, and before me light and behind me light. Place in my soul light. Magnify for me light, and amplify for me light. Make for me light and make me a light. O Allah, grant me light, and place light in my nerves, and in my body light and in my blood light and in my hair light and in my skin light.” Ameen

Bukhari and Muslim

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Surah 105 Al Fil

Let not man be intoxicated with power, Or material resourses, They cannot defeat. The purpose of Allah. So Abrahah Ashram Found to his cost. His sacrilegious attack On the holy Fane of Allah brought about His own undoing:what seemed but frail Destroyed his mighty hosts in a day!

The foolproof tip of the day for everyone else!

USE YOUR OWN VOICE TO RAISE YOUR OPINION!

Nasiyat..

(",) My Mum always says that
you should marry someone
who loves you more than you
love him, because that man
would never ever make you cry
or be the reason that your
sheding tears. He would do
anything to always keep you
happy and satisfied (",)

Poetry

(“,) Your heart is mine and mine is yours, and so it`s been since I`ve known love`s true meaning itself, holding each others hand we stand together beneath the lovely sky, gazing towards the same destiny, just U and I (“,)

Naat/hamd-Quote of the moment :)

Saari duniya ke liye dard
se mahmor hain jo..
Ik faqat Rehmat-e-aalam
hi ka seena dekha..

Ye sab tumhara
karam hain Aka
ke baat ab tak
bani hoyi hain..

Ehsas dein toofik dein..
Phir jazbaen Siddiq dein..

Kya ye zarra likhein
Shaan Unki, jin pe
bejhein Salaam
khud Khudai..

Quote of the moment :)

Though we might sometimes
have to struggle through thick
or thin,We will receive each
other’s support to be there to
win..And we will blossom like
this through eternity..
InshaAllah
Ameen summa ameen

Når du er forent med en
du elsker, er det ingenting
du ikke klarer :)

Gode ord skaper tillit.
Gode tanker skaper
Inderlighet. God
giverglede skaper
kjærlighet:)

Mood :)

Content.