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I remember a few years back when I was at the mela in Oslo enjoying it with my baji. We had lots of fun listening to music and drinking garam chai and eating garam garam jalebi:) There we met a friend of my baji`s. She had a little son joh khel raha tha udar. There were so many people there and her son was going idhar se udhar, must have been at least five meters away from hers. I was quite scared, udhar bachein gum bhi ho jatein hain na 😉 But she was watching her son and was quite confident. When I discussed this with my sister I was wondering how she could do that, I mean if it would have been my kid I`d maybe never ever let go of his hand. But phir meri baji ne mujhe samjaya ke she was doing correct. And I was like what?? She meant that kids should be given the smallest amount of freedom when they are kids. Like for instance that they eat themselves, put on their own clothes and tie their own shoes. Small things maybe you think, but no, it means a lot for the confidence level of that kid later on when he/she will become an adult.

I know that we Asians are very overprotective of our kids and sort of spoil them in a way, doing everything for them. The mothers I mean:) So the point is lean back sometime and let them make their own decision with your supervision, of course. Let them stand on their own feet. Let them build up their confidence level so that they won`t have any difficulty later in their life to make any decision. This is a must for every person in the world. On day or the other they will be on their own, and if they lack self-confidence, that could lead them to make some wrong decisions. People can misguide them, anything can happen. Give your children ache borein ki pehchan and most of all give them guidance so that they can make their own decisions asking themselves and not anyone else. After all, it is themselves who`m mostly know what is good for them and what is bad. Agar woh khud ko pehchantein hain tou woh apne liye acha faisla karein ghe, as long as they have that little self-confidence in themselves:) Just a thought:)

I`m the youngest one of my siblings, where i have mostly brothers. As being a girl and the youngest one is not the best combination always. Don`t take me wrong. Although it`s great to have brothers and everything they might be a bit overprotective about what`s happening in your life, and wants to protect you against everything almost always. I understand that they all care for me, though if everyone is going to make my decisions for me than I won`t be able to have that confidence in me to live my life and find my way. I`ve worked with this a lot and become more and more confident about myself. Though I sometimes think that what would be “death” for me is if I one day would get an overprotective husband as well.

Asian families are known as being more overprotective towards their daughters than their sons. This is the worst thing you can do to your kids. You have to have faith in your kids. Teach them all the good universal values and let them take their own decisions. Guide them don`t make their decisions! Soon the generation will change and Inshallah will the kids be brought up more equally. Inshallah they will be given the right upbringing to make them wonderful independent beings to have lots of guts to face what their life has to offer. I have a dream.. 🙂

One thing is for sure though. I have been very protected in my life, but it has kept me from coming into bad company as well. So I`m thankful for that.

I`ve thought about this several times that one actually always learn best from one`s own experience rather than someone else`s experience. I believe that that is the best source of learning. Well oki let me elaborate what I mean 🙂 I think it`s very important to listen to our elders be it a parent or anyone elder in the family.  But to a certain age the kids or the youth should be given the opportunity to learn from their own experience. Like you for one tell the kids this is like this and that is like that, and then you give them free chance to make up their own choice, right. You know they`re not going to listen to you hehe 😉 But anyway, you give them your lecture hmm.  And of course they act something you told them not to do. But you see now you have them in your hand 😀 Because from this they`ve learned that what the elders say is actually, well it actually makes sence and is for their own betterment. So next time you say anything to them, they`ll be thinking like he/she was right last time maybe he / she is right this time also 😉 And from there you have your kids in your hands 😉

And another important thing never ever let the kid inside of you grow up. Once that has happened there is no way back. Like a saying in Norwegian “aldri gi slipp på barnet I deg..” But of course this does not mean that one neglects ones own responsibilities. As an adult one has certain responsibilities to ones surroundings, keep fulfilling them as best as you can:) Letting the kid in you stay alive means: let`s have some fun:) Thats all 🙂

I`ve heard a saying that goes something like

if you want to hear the truth ask the kids because you`ll get a lot of it from them

..without censor.. There`s something about this that catches my mind. Everything just gets out of their mouth without them thinking it through. This has led me to the conclusion that there has come a change between the kids that grew up before and the ones that are being brought up nowadays. I feel kids have lost their innocence. Sometimes they talk about stuff that I never even knew about when I was at their age. Although I must admit my childhood was quite protected, being the youngest sibling. Anyway the kids learn a lot at school but I reckon it’s the media that has most of their attention, internet and especially television telling the kids everything from A to Z about everything…

Maybe I`m a bit old fashioned when I say that I wish we could protect the kids more than we do. I think the parents should not let the kids watch too much television or sit on the net all by themselves. The parents should know what the children`s are watching and not let the media take over the upbringing but have the total control in their own hand. If I could influence the parents I would say never let the kids sit alone on the net or watch television without you knowing anything about the program. Be strict and become their inspiration in doing outdoor activities by setting a good example. Occupy them with healthy habits from the start, like reading books or different kinds of exercises to trim their mind as well. Just take a trip to the bookstore nearby and see if you can find something useful.

Check out and click on site www . Purify Your Gaze . com

My Prayer..

“O Allah, place light in my heart, and on my tongue light, and in my ears light and in my sight light, and above me light, and below me light, and to my right light, and to my left light, and before me light and behind me light. Place in my soul light. Magnify for me light, and amplify for me light. Make for me light and make me a light. O Allah, grant me light, and place light in my nerves, and in my body light and in my blood light and in my hair light and in my skin light.” Ameen

Bukhari and Muslim

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January 2020
« Apr    

Surah 105 Al Fil

Let not man be intoxicated with power, Or material resourses, They cannot defeat. The purpose of Allah. So Abrahah Ashram Found to his cost. His sacrilegious attack On the holy Fane of Allah brought about His own undoing:what seemed but frail Destroyed his mighty hosts in a day!

The foolproof tip of the day for everyone else!



(",) My Mum always says that
you should marry someone
who loves you more than you
love him, because that man
would never ever make you cry
or be the reason that your
sheding tears. He would do
anything to always keep you
happy and satisfied (",)


(“,) Your heart is mine and mine is yours, and so it`s been since I`ve known love`s true meaning itself, holding each others hand we stand together beneath the lovely sky, gazing towards the same destiny, just U and I (“,)

Naat/hamd-Quote of the moment :)

Saari duniya ke liye dard
se mahmor hain jo..
Ik faqat Rehmat-e-aalam
hi ka seena dekha..

Ye sab tumhara
karam hain Aka
ke baat ab tak
bani hoyi hain..

Ehsas dein toofik dein..
Phir jazbaen Siddiq dein..

Kya ye zarra likhein
Shaan Unki, jin pe
bejhein Salaam
khud Khudai..

Quote of the moment :)

Though we might sometimes
have to struggle through thick
or thin,We will receive each
other’s support to be there to
win..And we will blossom like
this through eternity..
Ameen summa ameen

Når du er forent med en
du elsker, er det ingenting
du ikke klarer :)

Gode ord skaper tillit.
Gode tanker skaper
Inderlighet. God
giverglede skaper

Mood :)